Robotech Blooper Reels

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:54 am

No good series should be without it....a blooper reel...Robotech should not be an exception...
Submitt your footage of Robotech's less-than-cinematic moments and cut footage...

In general there are 3 themes of Bloopers:

*Life's a Stage---These are 'production bloopers', with the assumption that Robotech is being filmed live-action on a set with props and special effects, and the characters are aware they're playing fictional roles. The bloopers therefore tend to play off this, with missed cues, backstage hijinx, and editing errors. Xovers are possible, assuming that other shows are being filmed on adjacent 'sets', so StarScream subbing as a Veritech, or Ranma 1/2's Shampoo making a takeout delivery on a set (by coming through the wall) are entirely possible.

*In-Show Wipeout---These are accidents and incidents that COULD have happened in the course of the actual storyline, due to Reality(Laws of Physics) manifesting in force, and Probability taking its toll. Xovers with other series are very unlikely in these sorts of bloopers, but military hangfires, characters losing script immunity and actually getting killed, mechanical failures, and Cruel Twists of Fate are more likely.

*Off-Reservation---This is where things go off-script and defy reality. Alternate universes, dreamscapes, shocking revelations of the 4th Wall, and the like are the norm for Off-Reservation bloopers. Like Monty Python sketches where the odd is accepted as normal by the people trapped in the sketch. Xovers are almost a staple of this type of Blooper.

(Shadow Chronicles)
*Ariel flying in towards the Mother Hive...suddenly, instead of passing through its sides, she bounces off and falls into the trees...
*Ouch*
Above the special effects panel to the side of where she was supposed to fly in opens up...

(Convening with Scott at Reflex Point:
Ariel: "Scott, we're proof Human and Invid CAN co-exist!.."
Scott:(looking rather flabbergasted) "Ariel.."
Ariel: "Only I can convince the Regis there has to be another way..."
Scott: (looking slightly bugeyed and red-faced at this point)"Ariel!..."
(FRom Offcamera):"ARIEL! WE EDIT IN THE GLOWING NUDITY -AFTER- THE SHOT WITH SPECIAL EFFECTS!"
Ariel:(suddenly aware)"You do?!...eep..."

Macross:
MInmei: "And this is my cousin Kyle!"
(Kyle steps forward looking belligerently at Rick HUnter...starts to say something...then suddenly steps forward, grabs and embraces him in a French double-cheek kiss)
Kyle: "MY LONG LOST BROTHER! YOU'VE RETURNED!!!"
Minmei: "You forgot your lines again..."
(everyone breaks up laughing...)

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 11:18 am

ROFLMAO!!! Those would have ben funny to see made like that! :lol:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 3:49 pm

*Wham*
*Wham*
*Wham*
*Wham*
*Wham*
*Wham*

---Captain Gloval; constantly whacking his head on the bridge door coaming...

*WHUNCH*

--This time it's Claudia Grant who's out cold in the hatchway...

-----------------------------------------

(The Regis appears inside ReFlex Point towering over Bernard's group...
)
Regis:"HUMANS! YOU---!!!!!"
(She trips on the trail of her robes and falls over on top of several of the humans)
Regis: "A little help here...?"

-------------
Regis: "Behold, the Humans, tainted by the Children of the Shadow, as proven by tjeir latest technology....."
(The Hive sphere shows the ShadowFighters in all their brilliant black glory..)
ShadowFighter Pilot #1: "Hey! Looks! We're on Hive TV!"
ShadowFighter Pilot #2: "Hi, Mom!"
Director(off-camera): "CUT!!!"
ShadowFighter Pilot #2:"Hey, dude, like we're supposed to be invisible, right? Then how come she can see us anyway?"

----------------------------------

(SCott Bernard comes zipping up on his Cyclone, leaps into the air and starts transformation...only some of the parts miss connection...)
Scott: "OH SHI-----!"
(Hurdles off-camera)
WHAMCRUNCHOHBOYTHATSGINGTOLEAVEAMARK
"..medic.."

---------------------------------------

"Restore Zor's Memories."
(lab sequence shows the bar-graph showing Zor Prime's memories supposedly being returned to him...the bar reaches its end..Zor Prime wakes up...)
Zor Prime: "I feel like having a peanut-butter and bananna sandwich! And where's my rhinestone jacket?!"
Clone Master: "You fools! You transplanted Elvis's memories, not the original Zor's!"
(meanwhile, the 15th is waiting under cover and watching the procedure)
Dante: "Okay....I always knew Elvis was somehow involved with aliens...this just clenches it..."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 4:13 pm

ROFLMAO!!! Very good.

:::The zentraedi are in earth orbit. Breetai orders two cruisers to check out the fortress. The cruisers approach earth. Mean while on Macross Island the alarms start going off. The SDF 1 starts the automatic firing sequence. The beam fires like normal, but instead of the cruisers being hit. The beam plows straigth into Breetai's command ship!:::

Director: "opps. Can we get some replacement actors from the SAG. I'm sure they won't mind. We pay well. Make sure they can find someone who is very tall and brawny looking!"

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 4:19 pm

These are great, keep em up

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 4:24 pm

Exedore: "You brought in KHYRON!?! He's known as the Tapdancer among his own men...why are you looking at me like that...oh..."
(meanwhile Breetai is looking at him incredulously...The main view screen lights up to show Khyron grinning uncharacteristically as he begins to go through the pantomime motions like he's twirling a cane and lifting a straw hat and dancing, while the bridge crew and camera men break out laughing)

--------

Zentraedi ship hangar scene...Zentraedi troops are supposed to come in and bag Lisa Hayes...
Instead one of them overshoots and accidentally boots her across the room, kettle over arse....
Lisa: "Eeeeeyyyyyyyooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!........."*whompf*
Zentraedi Trooper:"Thanks be we left that pile of cleaning rags in the corner..."

-------

Bowie:"Musica!"
Clone: "No, I'm not Musica, I'm Allegra...she's Musica..."(points at triplet coming into scene..)
Clone2:"No, I'm Octavia, that's who.."
Musica(coming into scene): "Who's where?"
Allegra: "Who's on first..."
Bowie: "What?!"
Octavia: "What's on second..."
(and they're OFF!)

-------

(Musica sends her hovercar careening at the 15th and their execution guards...Only, instead of hitting the guards, it plows into the 15th instead, killing them all instantly)
Musica: "Oops..."
Clone Guards: "*Oh great...Orlin, call a Clone Master...we're going to have to speed clone these micronians back to life so THEN we can kill them like we intended, and get back on schedule...And YOU, young lady, are going to be ticketted for reckless operation of a motorvehicle..."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 5:06 pm

LOL Very good Taalismn!

:::A somber moment at the end of the Sentinels as Breetai and the Regent face each other in this last fight to the death. The two warriors step towards each other with menace on their minds. But as they approach each other they clasp hands. And then the argument starts.:::

:::Breetai::: "Its my turn to lead!"

:::Regent::: "No, its my turn."

:::Breetai::: "No, you led the last dance!"

:::Regent, suddenly looking serious faced::: "By goram you're right."

:::And the two dance off the camera. And then you hear from someone off camera.::: "War does make strange bed-fellows." :eek:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:03 pm

(Nova Satori, part of the GMP unit pocking through the battlefield after the Robotech Mothership made its escape, hears something, and instinctively pulls her sidearm while directing a spotlight at the source of the noise...)
Nova: "Who's there! Come out where we can see ---*BAM*(accidental weapons discharge)"
Zor Prime:(off-camera) *GHak!*
Director: "SAAATTTOORRIIII!!!! HOW_MANY_ TIMES MUST WE TELL YOU!?!
SAFETY _ON_!!! Miss Ayanami, get another Zor-clone out from props....And pick up a prop gun for Miss Satori while you're at it!"

BookWyrm · Unread post by **BookWyrm** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 10:29 pm

Scene: The SDF-1 begins it's power-up....the engines whine in build-up, the tech counts down to fold...but at T-01, the power cuts out, everything goes dark! There's just enough detail to see quick-shots of people looking at each other, confused....Then someone walks over to a panel, gives it the ol' Fonzie rap, and the power comes back on.

Same scene as above, only when the power cuts out, there is a moment of silence.....as the SFX of a bad car starter attepts to turn over....
Lisa Hayes: "What Happened?!"
Claudia Grant, speaking to Dr.Lang on the comms: "You flooded it again, didn't you?"
Lang: "Vhat? Eet vas fine ovir de veekend...."
Gloval: *sigh*

The launch sequence from the begining: Rich Hunter speeds down the launchdeck, the VF-1 just clears...there's an audible *TWANG!* as the jet's back-end drops, pointing the jet nose-straight-up but continues on it's 'normal' path......
FX Director: "BOB! I told you to use the GOOD piano wire! Jeez!"

The Macross Island Firefight: A Zentraedi Pod fires, then ducks behind a half-shattered wall--cut to the VT, about to return fire, swings his rifle into range and--
*CLICK*
(pause)
*CLICK CLICK CLICK*
VT Pilot: "D@mnitD@mnitD@mnit! Alright, everybody TIME-OUT! Anybody got a spare clip? I'm out of ammo....AGAIN!"
Z-Pod: *snickering*: "Dude, you gotta remember to *reload*!"
VT Pilot (sarcastic): "Yeah, thanks!"

The SDF-1 slowly cruises across the screen....a haunting familiar musical tone plays during the voiceover....
Gloval: "Shpace...ze final frrronteer....zees arr ze voyages off ze shtarship---"
Claudia: "Captain, what are you going on about?"
Gloval: "Oh ahhh, nohzing. Nohzing at all."

Comrade Corsarius · Sat Sep 15, 2007 3:29 am

The final battle against the Zentraedi is set. Dolza's fortress is in orbit about the earth. It is down to the loyal forces of Breetai, the SDF-1, and the magic of Minmei's music to even the score.

Gloval: 'Are you ready miss minmei?'
Minmei: 'Uh huh!'
Gloval: 'Then we begin. Roll the music!'
<Minmei begins to mime 'we will win', but the music track is 'the hamsterdance'>
Laughter all round, with Minmei looking upset.
Minmei: 'I was told I was going to be the STAR of this movie. I'll be in my trailer, talking with my AGENT about you!' (stomps off in a huff)

Director: CUT! (Gloval mimes 'Gag reel!' to the camera)

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 7:21 am

Rick and Minmei in the cockpit of VT.
Minmei:Oh,Rick th---.What's that smell?
Rick(smirking):What smell?

Camera shows Khyron and battle pods lined up.
Khyron:(singing)It's just a jump to the left!
Battle pods:And then a step to the right.
Director:cut!

On the bridge of the SDF-1.
Vanassa:Sir I'm reading some thing strange on radar.
Glovlal:Vat iss it vanassa?
Vanassa:It 's a one eyed-one horned-flying-purple-people- eater.Sir

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:32 am

Claudia: "Message coming in from the alien ship, sir!"
Gloval: "Put it up!"
(audio-video cuts to Dolza, Khyron, Azonia, and Grel doing a pretty good barbershop quartet rendition...)
Gloval: "Drop the Minmey Attack...they're onto us already."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:43 am

(THe attack on Macross Island)
Short Outtakes....
Battlepods constantly tripping and sliding down the roads on their faces..."Superior Alien Technology my a@@@" sniggers a VF pilot....

Gerwalk Veritech screaming along a roadway paralleling a Battlepod when the VF suddenly faceplants into a telephone pole...the Battlepod stops and the pilot gets out to pry the VF out of the roadbed amidst jeers...

Artillery Pod fires a salvo of missiles from the ridge...straight up...all surrounding pods book out of the way as the ABP goes noticeably knock-kneed looking up at the salvo coming right back down....

Rick Hunter shoots the Zentraedi BP Pilot...who promptly gets up and begins doing an overly dramatic 'death scene', groaning and growling and 'arghing' as he clutches his chest and careens from one side of the street to the other, falling to his knees, getting back up again, etc, etc...hamming it up....Roy Fokker comes up behind him and pantomimes putting the guy out of his misery as Minmei, behind Rick, is giggling her head off...

Battlepods go chasing a VF down a Macross City street...and whenever there's a street chase...yep...there's a fruit stand...which promptly gets annihilated....

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:04 am

Great stuff

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:42 am

*Claudia and Lisa are at their stand-up action positions looking serious when a soap bubble drifts by...then another...then another...Then there's giggling from behind them...then a double-bubble goes by..
They turn and look behind them...There's Gloval calmly seated and blowing soap bubbles through his pipe, while the Bridge Bunnies are trying not to break up laughing....

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 2:57 pm

On the set of minmei's movie.
Roy:Hi Minmei
Minmei:Hi F&*@#.I mean Fokker.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:38 pm

(Southern Cross Battle Bloopers)

-Hovertank in Gladiator mode rolls out its main gun and fires...WHOOSH!- and the recoil blasts it off the screen...
Director: "CUT! Let's drop the whole projectile cannon and go with an ion weapon, okay?!"

-Squadron of Logans flying in tight formation...then a Volkswagon Bug noses into the center of the formation...Suddenly the pilots realize they're flying too low....

--Bowie and Dana see bright lights around one of the Reflex Point mounds...they dismount to investigate, climbing over the rocks to see an area of bright lines and technological activity...then something BIG comes looming over them...
*BWHAW-BWHAW-BWHAW-BWHHAAAAAWWWWWWW*
(Human voice from below..)"Hey, you! In the rocks! Either get down here or get out of here! Can't you see we're having a First Contact situation here?!"
Grumbling, Dana and Bowie leave the 'Close Encounters of the Third Kind' crew and Mothership to go check on the activity at the OTHER mounds....

---Battle between Hovertanks and Bioroids....The Bioroids summon up their remote-control Hover Platforms to board and retreat...Only one Bioroid leaps for his craft and misses.....Another gets hit in the head by his own hovercraft...the last goes boogie-boarding out of control over the Hovertanks, trying to keep his balance, before falling off and rolling into the dust....

---Dana; the 'Rabbitech' gag....Cut scene showing Nova on the awards platform pulling on a hunting cap, working the slide on a shotgun she's pulled out of the lectern, and winking to her companion; "Qwiet...I'm huntin' wabbit!"

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 1:14 am

batlchip wrote:Rick and Minmei in the cockpit of VT.
Minmei:Oh,Rick th---.What's that smell?
Rick(smirking):What smell?

Camera shows Khyron and battle pods lined up.
Khyron:(singing)It's just a jump to the left!
Battle pods:And then a step to the right.
Director:cut!

On the bridge of the SDF-1.
Vanassa:Sir I'm reading some thing strange on radar.
Glovlal:Vat iss it vanassa?
Vanassa:It 's a one eyed-one horned-flying-purple-people- eater.Sir

BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 9:02 pm

(Shadow Chronicles Bloopers)

(Maia and Louie aboard the Icarus find Janice Em)
Maia: "Looks like some sort of android...looks broken..."
Louie:"Ah, them we'll just have to repair her....(fiddles around for a few minutes)...mmm, that didn't work...(fiddles some more)...not that either...We'll just have to do it the old-fashioned way.."
(Gets up and gives Janice a good stiff kick...She springs back to life immediately)
Janice: "WHO DID THAT?!!!!!"
Louie:"She did!"(pushing Maia at Janice, before running like hell...)

(Ariel teleports with Louie and several technicians aboard the Ark Angel....and immediately one of the techs falls backwards off the edge of the platform)
Ariel: "I -SAID_ STAY CLOSE TOGETHER!!"

(Security Guards escorting Janice Em to the Ark Angel...Suddenly one them stops)
Guard 1: "Guys? If she's an android who can assume any human form as a disguise, and she's suspected of working with the enemy.....Why isn't she in handcuffs or something, instead of just walking ahead of us free?"
Guard 2:"Oh crud....now the universe will have to plug the logic hole you just openned by killing us off!"
Guard 3:"I thought transferring off the Enterprise saved me from this sort of thing..."

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 9:21 pm

Great stuff, taalismn.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Sep 16, 2007 9:28 pm

Louie: "I said I was sorry! How was I supposed to know that kitchen magnets would work on Janice like that?! I didn't even KNOW she had errogenous zones...."
Maia: "You know the camera's on...?"
Louie: "Oh no!!!"
Director: "CUT!!! Where is this coming from? It's too early for you to even be THINKING about that sort of thing!!!"

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 2:52 am

Scene:Rick and Khyron faceing off. When suddenly Megatron leaps in front of the camera and blasts Rick's veritech to bits.
Megatron:Die! Opt---,oops.Sorry bout that.Wrong set.

Dana goes to kick Angelo in the shin misses and gets the twins
Dana:Oh, I'm terrible sorry.
Angelo:(Rolling on the floor)Uhhhh!

Scene:Breetai's Command center.
Breetai:Where's Exedore
Crewmen:Just got back from the microain ship sir.
Exedore(walking in wearing a leather jacket,blue jeans,biker boots, and a metalica shirt.)Dude, Those micro dudes are awsome!

Nxla666 · Unread post by **Nxla666** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 6:01 am

Rabid Southern Cross Fan · Mon Sep 17, 2007 6:23 am

taalismn wrote:(Southern Cross Battle Bloopers)

Nxla666 · Unread post by **Nxla666** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 9:28 am

Last words of Rick Hunter...

*sounds of naughtiness coming from a dark room*

Rick: "Oh, Minmay!!!"

Lisa (not Minmay): "WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!"

Rick: "OH SHI..glllkk."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:24 pm

ROFLMAO!!!!! Those were great!!!! :lol:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 9:20 pm

(Macross-"Reconstruction Blues")

Rick Hunter's trying to talk down two rampaging full-sized Zentraedi...One leans down and 'flicks' him with one finger, sending him crashing into the feet of the security Excaliburs...
---Shot after shot of the Zentraedi flicking an obvious stunt dummy and constantly missing the target....flipping it into a store front, into oncoming traffic...over the roofs over to the next street...The other Zentraedi is going "he shoots, he scores...we do the shot all over again!".

---Rick gets flicked into the feet of the Excalibur destroid...which inadvertantly steps on him...Shot of him being hauled off in an ambulance, while Lisa is saying "Hey, I didn't do it this time!"...

--------------

Rick, Lisa, and Ben locked in a cell aboard Breetai's flaghsip, discussing escape plans...
Rick: "Okay, flushing ourselves down the drain; novel and possible only in this situation, but not a good idea...Likewise the striptease to distract the guard...very bad..."
Lisa: "Why not?"
Rick: "Because just thinking about Ben doing a bump and grind is giving -me- stomach cramps...and we need to be on our best to take advantage of any opportunity..."

(Rick and Lisa running on Breetai's flagship from pursuing guards when the floor falls out from under them..)
Lisa: "IIIICCAANNN'TTTT SWWWIIiiimmmmmmmmmmmm*pludh*"

Lisa: "We fell into some sort of reservoir..."
Rick: "Rservoir...? Fell?..>Oh no...!!!"
Lisa: "What's wrong, Rick?"
Rick:"Giant beings, fall, reservoir, lost! We're in terrible danger, Lisa! Terrible danger!"
Lisa:"What ARE you talking about, Hunter?"
Rick: "Didn't you ever see King Kong?!!!!"
(around them comes the sound of scuttling in the darkness...)

The awards ceremony...
Minmei walks up to congratulate the returned heroes and to pin the medals on them for surviving the Zentraedi..she walks up to Rick, puts the medal on his chest...)
Rick: "*Plargh!*(coughs up blood and collapses)
(..she suddenly realizes she's pinned it through his -heart-...Before she can do it to anybody else, a senior officer steps foward and offers to do it -right-)

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 9:44 pm

ROFLMAO!!!

:::The counter attack at saturn. The SDF-1 begins to dexcend into the rings of saturn. The SDF-1 hits a very chunk of ice (can you say iceberg) which rips a huge chenk out of the ship. The alarms sound inside the ship. Captain Gloval immediately reaches for the public address mike.::: "Abandon ship! Abandon ship! Every man woman and child get to the lifeboats. Girls get to your lifeboat. I'm staying with the ship." :::The bridge crew departs the bridge. After everyone is gone Captainh Gloval smiles and lifts up a seat cushion. He pulls a pile of clothes from underneath.::: "Good thing no one ever looked underneath here." :::As he unfolds the clothing revealing a dress. He quickly dons it and then he reaches back into the area he picked thedress from and pulls a wig. He places the wig on. He looks around at the bridge and then he departs too.::: "Who says a Captain has to go down with his ship!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 10:00 pm

("Happy Holidays" Blooper)
(Khyron's just trashed Macross City...now his orders go out to his saboteurs...On a street corner a Santa prepares to press a transmitter...)
"HEY!!! This is -MY-CORNER you &*&7^&!!! Jerk%^%&^! Go find your own ^&*^78#!! corner, you $&$%^&!!!"
---A scruffy, drunken Santa and a short black elf begin kicking the snot out of the first Santa, breaking his arm, and smashing the transmitter in the process...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Sep 18, 2007 11:47 am

:::Continuing on another corner a zentraedi who wasn't micronized is dressed as a Santa walks onto the set.:::

:::Director::: "Hey you! You're are not supposed to be full sized. You're supposed to be human sized."

:::Zentraedi::: "I thought they wanted a full bodied Santa's!"

:::Director::: "We meant fully stuffed human sized Santa's!"

:::Zentraedi::: "Opps! Me bad!" :::Walks off set.:::

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Sep 18, 2007 8:16 pm

*Miriya in the Protoculture Chamber: "Hello! The latch is stuck! I can't get out this thing! Somebody?! Help!"

Doctor: "Fokker may well have survived the multiple gunshot and shrapnel injuries, if he hadn't choked on the pineapple salad first..."
(everybody looks askance at Claudia...)

*Lynn Kyle's fight in the Little White Dragon..
*Punch*Kick*Bodyslam**Chairsmash!*(THUD)
Kyle: "...owww.....wrong chair...you were supposed to use the OTHER one..."

*Max Sterling, hidding in a bathroom aboard the Zentraedi flagship when a Zentraedi bursts in...
Zentraedi: "Ah?! Look, dude, can you punch me out later? I REALLY gotta to go..."

*Rick Hunter's Veritech doing a flying transformation, when it falls apart in mid flight, sending the cockpit flying off into space....

*Rick Hunter's Armored VF blasts into the THeatre Scout and through the wall screens to see...
The three Zentraedi spies sitting in their crash couches staring intently at him, absentmindedly stuffing their faces with popcorn and sipping from cold drinks...
Rico: "Wow....I LOVE these three-dee graphics...You'd almost swear there WAS a micronian mecha in here with us...."

AuroraKet · Unread post by **AuroraKet** » Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:05 pm

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:38 pm

*Rick, Lisa, and Ben being interrogated by Dolza...
Lisa: "Kiss me, Hunter, that's an order..."
(One quick chaste kiss ...gagging Zentraedi...They both stop...and Lisa gets an unholy look in her eyes...)
Lisa:(huskily) "Take me NOW, Hunter, that's an order!"
(...and immediately proceeds to ravish poor Rick...)
Ben:(dodging a discarded shirt) "That dry spell musta been longer than we all thought..."
(meanwhile Dolza's petrified in shock, Breetai's out cold and blood running from his nose, there's an Exedore-shaped hole in the wall, and the three spies are looking like a mass food poisoning event..)

panzerfaust · Unread post by **panzerfaust** » Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:15 pm

taalismn wrote:*Rick, Lisa, and Ben being interrogated by Dolza...
Lisa: "Kiss me, Hunter, that's an order..."
(One quick chaste kiss ...gagging Zentraedi...They both stop...and Lisa gets an unholy in her eyes...)
Lisa:(huskily) "Take me NOW, Hunter, that's an order!"
(...and immediately proceeds to ravish poor Rick...)
Ben:(dodging a discarded shirt) "That dry spell musta been longer than we all thought..."
(meanwhile Dolza's petrified in shock, Breetai's out cold and blood running from his nose, there's an Exedore-shaped hole in the wall, and the three spies are looking like a mass food poisoning event..)

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Sep 19, 2007 10:52 am

Great ones Taalismn!!!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Sep 19, 2007 11:20 am

--Cut from consideration for the Shadow Chronicles:
--The Haydonite Petite Cola Machine Assassination Droid..."Tactically sound, but I don't think they drink it anymore!"
---Invid-owned 'Hooters' franchise...
---Protoculture-powered Baby Vending Machines...deposit coins, submit cell sample(s), open incubator when bell rings...sure, it would be an example of a non-military application of Robotechnology, and would solve the Hunters' family woes, but really....

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Sep 19, 2007 11:24 am

ROFLMAO!!! Great one Taalismn!!! :lol:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Sep 19, 2007 9:38 pm

*Reconstruction Blues: The Confrontation Scene in the Street...again...
Excalibur Destroid Pilot:(over loudhailer) "Cease and desisss...ssss...ah...ahCH*CHUMMMMMPFFFCHUMMPFFFBLAMBLAMBLAM-
BUDDABUDDABUDDABUDDABUDDABUDDABUDDASKREEEYYYYOOOOWW-
WHUMPFWHUMPFFFFWWWOOOOSSSHHHHHHHTAKTAKTAKTAKTAKTAKTAK-
BLAMBLAMMITYBLAMRIPROARSHHHROOOWWWWDANGADANGDANGA-
ZOOOUUUWWWWFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!*"

...when the smoke clears, the Excalibur is still standing there, but its gun clusters are smoking, its head machine guns are smoking, its shoulder and backpack missile racks are empty...even those puny little leg missile pods are empty, and its particle-beam cannon arms are glowing red...a pile of shell casings is heaped up around and over its ankles..

...and in a wide arc in front of it, there's not a building standing for over 3 miles...fires are blazing...there's two sets of Zentraedi-sized boots that are smoldering from mid-calf up...some assorted mecha parts...
...anxious eyes peering up from below street level show where somebody...probably Rick, Lisa, and Tommy Luan...since they aren't in sight in anywhere, and let's not assume the worst....apparently managed to go to ground in a storm drain...

Excalibur Pilot 2(in destroid next to the first): "Gesundteit..."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Thu Sep 20, 2007 3:19 pm

ROFLMAO Another extremely funny one! :lol:

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Thu Sep 20, 2007 4:15 pm

Southern cross
Scene:Nova and Dana in Dana's room.
Dana:(Walking past Nova in towle)Oh,take it easy.I'm just going to--
Nova:(Reaches out and pulls Dana close.)I can't stand it any more kiss me you fool.
Dana:You forgot your lines again didn't you.

Zor standing out of his biorid slips and falls.

Khyron yelling at Miriya:I tell you Mitilda.There is on--- Whoops(in a British accent)Sorry darling.forgot the line.

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Thu Sep 20, 2007 4:44 pm

LOL Great ones Batlchip!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 20, 2007 5:35 pm

*Zor versus two dozen Red Bioroids...they leap...he moves aside...they all collapse in one big heap in the middle of the room..

*Karno and his Guard Triumvirate standing ready..Karno gestures for his troops to open fire...and accidentally backhands his brother....

*Musica(after a clone takes a shot for her):"OH MY GOD YOU KILLED KENNY! YOU BASTARDS!!!"

*Dana catches the Protoculture Matrix and fails her move to bellyflop onto the floor unconscious...instead she trots to the end of the room and spikes it football-style as the thee Masters and Zor crack up...

*The Four Robotech Masters are shown there, looking menacing..>Wait, FOUR?! Okay, how did Zippy the Pinhead get in the shot?!

*The THree Masters confront Dana and Zor..Only the Masters are all wearing Hawaiian shirts, shorts, sandals, sporting sunglasses, and coconut drinks......"Much more comfortable than those silly robes"....
Zor is gobsmacked

*Zor pushes Dana into the escape pod...and gets his hand stuck as the hatch closes...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 20, 2007 8:27 pm

batlchip wrote:Southern cross
Zor standing out of his biorid slips and falls..

THis is a simple and classic FUBAR... Hard to be the dashing alien love-interest and enigmatic anti-hero when you're a klutz. :ok:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Sep 20, 2007 8:37 pm

*What Roy Fokker MIGHTA seen when they openned up a certain Battle Pod..

(A thin, famished-looking, Rick, Lisa, and Ben sitting around an improvized fire, chewing on bones...)
Rick:"Got any food, Roy? That space-warp took longer than we thought.."

(Ben, and Max climb out first, then lift a VERY pregnant Lisa up, with Rick coming up behind)
Rick: "Roy...don't ask...long story."

(Ben, Rick, Max, and Lisa standing inside the pod, waiting to be rescued...Only Ben's sporting a beard and has a hat pulled down over his eyes, Max is wearing a samurai swordsman's gi and blade, Rick's wearing a red shirt, and black loavers, and Lisa's wearing a skin-tight black leather biker's outfit...)
Rick: "Roy...don't ask...long story."

(Ben, Rick, Max, and Lisa standing inside the pod, waiting to be rescued...Ben's wearing a kung-fu muscle outfit showing off more muscles than a Dragonball-Z character, Max is clad in a suit of shining silver body armor like some sort of knight, Rick's wearing something like a Captain Harlock:Space Pirate outfit, and Lisa's dressed like Sheena, Queen of the Jungles of Mongo...)
Roy: (Interupts Rick about to open his mouth...)"Rick...I'm NOT going to ask...Long story, right?"

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Sep 21, 2007 11:54 am

ROFLMAO!!! Those were great! Poor Max in the first one!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 21, 2007 12:48 pm

*Macross---Reconstruction
The Zentraedi hijack a Protoculture Chamber and are making off with it on an enormous flatbed, while being chased...
--Suddenly the poorly secured chamber rolls off the flatbed during a turn, flipping several Zentraedi off in the process and rolling over two veritechs...THe flatbed continues on its course, as the remaining riders look back in dismay...

*The Grand Cannon
Grand Cannon warming up for its big shot....lights glowing, people running, orders being issued...
Admiral Hayes: "FIRE!"
(...sudden darkness and a winding down noise...)
Hayes: "Okay...what just happened?!"
Voice in Darkness: "Oops...pulled out the plug...just a sec.."
(Lights go back up, noise ramps back up, the Cannon fires...)

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Sep 21, 2007 12:51 pm

:::The grand cannon is about to fire! Instead of a beam of energy coming out a very large post and sign come out of the barrel. The sign says boom!:::

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Sep 21, 2007 8:42 pm

*Dolza, making important decisions before his most experienced advisors:
Dolza: "What about this? No? Then what about this?"
(...We see he's trying on various wigs and hairpieces, while his senior officers are looking on sweating and trying not to look too nervous or laugh out loud as a succession of toupees, afros, and shock-wigs are tried on...)

*Dana Sterling repelling out Zor's window, as Nova shakes her fist in anger....Dana's about to make it to the lower window when a hand reaches past Nova and ...pries loose the rope...With a scream, Sterling falls the rest of the way to the ground...
Nova turns around to see Zor, who's looking unashamed..
Zor: "Hey, she attacked me first!"

*Louie, angry about the misapplication of his pupil pistol, advances on the techs with a torch...
Louie: "You took my creation and made it into a weapon!! You bastards!"
Tech: "Well, what did you expect we were going to do with it? We're in Weapons Development, not Nintendo, nerdboy!"
Louie: "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME???!!!!"FWOOOSHHHH*WAAHHH!!!*

*Take 2: Dana steps between Louie and the techs.
Dana: "Louie, give me that--"FWOOOSHHHH*WAAHHH!!!*
Louie:(watching his CO rolling on the ground as the rest of the 15th rushes to put her out...)"Dang, these things are hair-trigger."

*BOwie and Musica get up in the morning in the wilderness...Bowie gets up...and promptly runs into a trooper with a messkit and coffee cup walking along....POV pulls out...the two fugitives are right in the middle of a camouflaged GMP bivuac area...."ARRGGGHHH!!"

Field Marshal Leonard: "Oh, I just thought you should know your godson is AWOL with a known alien agent!"
Emerson:"So, jealous he's getting some action and you ain't?"
(Leonard goes purple with rage...Like what's he gonna do to Emerson he hasn't already?)

batlchip · Unread post by **batlchip** » Sat Sep 22, 2007 1:02 pm

Scene:Max has just entered the closet with the ko'ed Soldier.
Zentraedi guard:(Opening the door)whoops sorry miss.(Closes door)
Scene 2:Max opens the door and walks out wearing High heels panty hose undies and a bra all in black.

Scene:Max showing off to ben and rick.
Max:This moves called Fokkers Fart, I mean feint
Roy:(Off camera) Fart uh.
Max:Sorry

Rimmer · Unread post by **Rimmer** » Sat Sep 22, 2007 4:48 pm

Rick and Minmay after just witnessing the bombardment of earth

MM: "mother...father...sob...."
RH: "Mr Whippy!"

This actually happened with my little bro, who just heard the Mr Whippy music and blurted it out at this moment.