Robotech Blooper Reels

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 6:19 pm

#"...what?..."#
#"Zentraedi ships are supposed to be green and grey....possibly purple....Lose the paint job...NOW"
#"But all I wanted was a little color..."#
#"NO racing stripes...and no bright red and orange and white scheme...."
#"....awww...."#
#"..And get rid of the 'Pizza Hut' logo."#
#"...but I already signed a contract...!"#

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Wed Oct 14, 2009 10:07 pm

taalismn wrote:#"...what?..."#
#"Zentraedi ships are supposed to be green and grey....possibly purple....Lose the paint job...NOW"
#"But all I wanted was a little color..."#
#"NO racing stripes...and no bright red and orange and white scheme...."
#"....awww...."#
#"..And get rid of the 'Pizza Hut' logo."#
#"...but I already signed a contract...!"#

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Oct 15, 2009 2:53 pm

Gloval's List of Things to Do If I Had to Do It All Over Again(Cont.):

*If I absolutely HAVE to utter some inane ephiphet, it will NOT be 'Thundering Asteroids!'...It will be something more suitably obscene and creative, like 'Flaming Hot Sasquatch ####!'

*If the peace activist complains again about 'military warmongers', I will immediately appoint him as our official representative to negotiate with the enemy....If he is able to distract them, I will use the time gained to consolidate our positions and prepare our defenses; if they kill him, I will use his death to make him a martyr and demonize the enmey for any other peaceniks who feel as he did, if he sells us out I will have him executed as a traitor, and, if, by some incredible long shot, he actually manages to make peace on terms agreeable to all, I will recommend him for sainthood and hang up my uniform.

*I will make sure the reconstructed alien starship I am in command of has its main armaments physically disconnected from fire control and power systems before the shakedown cruise.

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Thu Oct 15, 2009 10:48 pm

taalismn wrote:Gloval's List of Things to Do If I Had to Do It All Over Again(Cont.):

*If I absolutely HAVE to utter some inane ephiphet, it will NOT be 'Thundering Asteroids!'...It will be something more suitably obscene and creative, like 'Flaming Hot Sasquatch ####!'

*If the peace activist complains again about 'military warmongers', I will immediately appoint him as our official representative to negotiate with the enemy....If he is able to distract them, I will use the time gained to consolidate our positions and prepare our defenses; if they kill him, I will use his death to make him a martyr and demonize the enmey for any other peaceniks who feel as he did, if he sells us out I will have him executed as a traitor, and, if, by some incredible long shot, he actually manages to make peace on terms agreeable to all, I will recommend him for sainthood and hang up my uniform.

*I will make sure the reconstructed alien starship I am in command of has its main armaments physically disconnected from fire control and power systems before the shakedown cruise.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Oct 16, 2009 5:22 pm

The Regis appears on screen, looking as grumpy as ever, then she raises a tall glass of some sort of liquid, drains it down,...and her whole demeanor changes to 'sunny and smiling'...

%Ah, Flower of Life Juice...Amazon Select...Pulpless...It starts your day out right!%

(*Brought to you by the Flower of Life Growers' Association)

Ariel appears on screen, apparently, judging from the way she's dressed and doing her hair, she's going through her morning routine, when she apparently thinks of something: "Oh Scott? That's not OJ on the table, that's...oh dear, you already drank it? Well, it's either a trip to the Emergency Room or intense sex...I'll call your superior officer and tell him you'll be out for the day...Just stay there..."
She's smiling as she turns to the phone....

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sat Oct 17, 2009 12:30 am

taalismn wrote:The Regis appears on screen, looking as grumpy as ever, then she raises a tall glass of some sort of liquid, drains it down,...and her whole demeanor changes to 'sunny and smiling'...

%Ah, Flower of Life Juice...Amazon Select...Pulpless...It starts your day out right!%

(*Brought to you by the Flower of Life Growers' Association)

Ariel appears on screen, apparently, judging from the way she's dressed and doing her hair, she's going through her morning routine, when she apparently thinks of something: "Oh Scott? That's not OJ on the table, that's...oh dear, you already drank it? Well, it's either a trip to the Emergency Room or intense sex...I'll call your superior officer and tell him you'll be out for the day...Just stay there..."
She's smiling as she turns to the phone....

Ya, I am sure that she happen to forget to tell him that. :roll:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Oct 17, 2009 10:00 am

Yeah...it's something of a common occurance at the Bernard household...first with Flower of LIfe syrup and now with fresh-squeezed...Poor Scott STILL hasn't caught on yet...It's also why they don't have guests over any time...

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sat Oct 17, 2009 11:35 pm

taalismn wrote:Yeah...it's something of a common occurance at the Bernard household...first with Flower of LIfe syrup and now with fresh-squeezed...Poor Scott STILL hasn't caught on yet...It's also why they don't have guests over any time...

Though I am sure he doesn't complain about it much.

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Sun Oct 18, 2009 12:30 am

Alpha 11 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Yeah...it's something of a common occurance at the Bernard household...first with Flower of LIfe syrup and now with fresh-squeezed...Poor Scott STILL hasn't caught on yet...It's also why they don't have guests over any time...

Though I am sure he doesn't complain about it much.

Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration :demon:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Oct 18, 2009 1:38 pm

DhAkael wrote:
Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration

"Ugh...gagh...hurgh...gah!.,.(Scott clambers up into view, a bottle on the table next to him...he looks like he's run the Iron Man TRiatholon twice backwards and forwards) Hydromax....ten times more hydrating than the next leading sports drink...packed with healing factors, proteins, and low-residue energizers...Formulated to keep you going through those long patrols, crisis situations like alien invasions, and long makeout sessions with alien spouses...Endorsed by four out of four mixed marriages....HydroMax...Hydro to the Max!(hears something offscreen) COMING, DEAR!" (uncaps bottle, chugs it down, walks off-camera)

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Sun Oct 18, 2009 7:44 pm

taalismn wrote:
DhAkael wrote:
Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration

"Ugh...gagh...hurgh...gah!.,.(Scott clambers up into view, a bottle on the table next to him...he looks like he's run the Iron Man TRiatholon twice backwards and forwards) Hydromax....ten times more hydrating than the next leading sports drink...packed with healing factors, proteins, and low-residue energizers...Formulated to keep you going through those long patrols, crisis situations like alien invasions, and long makeout sessions with alien spouses...Endorsed by four out of four mixed marriages....HydroMax...Hydro to the Max!(hears something offscreen) COMING, DEAR!" (uncaps bottle, chugs it down, walks off-camera)

Yup.
That about covers it :angel:

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sun Oct 18, 2009 9:42 pm

taalismn wrote:
DhAkael wrote:
Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration

"Ugh...gagh...hurgh...gah!.,.(Scott clambers up into view, a bottle on the table next to him...he looks like he's run the Iron Man TRiatholon twice backwards and forwards) Hydromax....ten times more hydrating than the next leading sports drink...packed with healing factors, proteins, and low-residue energizers...Formulated to keep you going through those long patrols, crisis situations like alien invasions, and long makeout sessions with alien spouses...Endorsed by four out of four mixed marriages....HydroMax...Hydro to the Max!(hears something offscreen) COMING, DEAR!" (uncaps bottle, chugs it down, walks off-camera)

drewkitty ~..~ · Mon Oct 19, 2009 2:48 am

taalismn wrote:
DhAkael wrote:
Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration

"Ugh...gagh...hurgh...gah!.,.(Scott clambers up into view, a bottle on the table next to him...he looks like he's run the Iron Man TRiatholon twice backwards and forwards) Hydromax....ten times more hydrating than the next leading sports drink...packed with healing factors, proteins, and low-residue energizers...Formulated to keep you going through those long patrols, crisis situations like alien invasions, and long makeout sessions with alien spouses...Endorsed by four out of four mixed marriages....HydroMax...Hydro to the Max!(hears something offscreen) COMING, DEAR!" (uncaps bottle, chugs it down, walks off-camera)

hum.... stamina juice

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Oct 19, 2009 5:51 pm

drewkitty ~..~ wrote:
taalismn wrote:
DhAkael wrote:
Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration

"Ugh...gagh...hurgh...gah!.,.(Scott clambers up into view, a bottle on the table next to him...he looks like he's run the Iron Man TRiatholon twice backwards and forwards) Hydromax....ten times more hydrating than the next leading sports drink...packed with healing factors, proteins, and low-residue energizers...Formulated to keep you going through those long patrols, crisis situations like alien invasions, and long makeout sessions with alien spouses...Endorsed by four out of four mixed marriages....HydroMax...Hydro to the Max!(hears something offscreen) COMING, DEAR!" (uncaps bottle, chugs it down, walks off-camera)

hum.... stamina juice

Comes in four bottle sizes-Full(.75liter), Magnum(1 liter), Scott Bernard/Methuselah(6 liters), and the Shinji Ikari-Sterling/Balthazar(12 liters)

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Mon Oct 19, 2009 9:41 pm

taalismn wrote:
drewkitty ~..~ wrote:
taalismn wrote:
DhAkael wrote:
Well, except for the bruising, possible protein depletion and dehydration

"Ugh...gagh...hurgh...gah!.,.(Scott clambers up into view, a bottle on the table next to him...he looks like he's run the Iron Man TRiatholon twice backwards and forwards) Hydromax....ten times more hydrating than the next leading sports drink...packed with healing factors, proteins, and low-residue energizers...Formulated to keep you going through those long patrols, crisis situations like alien invasions, and long makeout sessions with alien spouses...Endorsed by four out of four mixed marriages....HydroMax...Hydro to the Max!(hears something offscreen) COMING, DEAR!" (uncaps bottle, chugs it down, walks off-camera)

hum.... stamina juice

Comes in four bottle sizes-Full(.75liter), Magnum(1 liter), Scott Bernard/Methuselah(6 liters), and the Shinji Ikari-Sterling/Balthazar(12 liters)

I am almost afraid to ask how those were inspired.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Oct 19, 2009 10:54 pm

Champagne sizes....Have you ever SEEN a Balthazar-sized bottle? Forget about building a ship in one...you could build an aircraft carrier or a small tropical island in one...

drewkitty ~..~ · Tue Oct 20, 2009 5:48 pm

Energy drinks have been for many years (30-40) have been sold in japan. They were first sold in places that catered to couples 'getting together'. So they ended up being called Stamina Juice in slang.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Oct 20, 2009 7:16 pm

Southern Cross Soldier: "WE're in TROUBLE here!!!!! Scouts verify: the aliens are shooting up their shocktroops with Red Bull!!!"

Tirolian Clone Master: "I thought we were dosing the expendables with pain serum?!"
Clone Tech:"At this point, with our supplies all messed up, we're using whatever we can get our hands on..."
TCM: "Including animal steroids, I see."(as they watch a HUMUNGOUSLY muscled clone trip on his way out of the dropship, fall, and break his neck)

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Tue Oct 20, 2009 9:39 pm

taalismn wrote:Southern Cross Soldier: "WE're in TROUBLE here!!!!! Scouts verify: the aliens are shooting up their shocktroops with Red Bull!!!"

Tirolian Clone Master: "I thought we were dosing the expendables with pain serum?!"
Clone Tech:"At this point, with our supplies all messed up, we're using whatever we can get our hands on..."
TCM: "Including animal steroids, I see."(as they watch a HUMUNGOUSLY muscled clone trip on his way out of the dropship, fall, and break his neck)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Oct 21, 2009 3:36 pm

"Taskforce Foxtrot here, sir! We've found that shipload of enemy troopers and...."
"And?! Are you engaging them?! What's your situation?"
"Well, sir...looks the enemy already took THEMSELVES out..."
"...what...?!"
(Shot of the Tactical Corps unit in dug-in position while below them, in plain sight, is a congregation of clone soldiers...
utterly zoned out....most of them are on the ground staring up into the sky with stupid grins on their faces...a few are staggering around, bumping into each other, waving their arms slowly...except for one hopping up and down flapping his arms...A few are looking at the guns in their hands, utterly entranced by the highlights shining off the plastic, or waving them slowly around...while other clones are watching the circles the gun muzzles make twirling in the air oh SO intently....others in the background are playing with strands of grass...or eating it....another one is trying to eat his uniform sash...and so on...suffice to say, NONE of them appear very belligerent...)

Meanwhile...aboard the Robotech Mothership.
Guard Centurion(glaring at medtech who's staring at the hypo in his hand): "You idiot! Pain serum! PAIN SERUM! -NOT SEDATIVES- YOU IMB(medtech jabs him with the hypo-FZZT-)Ieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee(thud)"

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Wed Oct 21, 2009 9:56 pm

taalismn wrote:"Taskforce Foxtrot here, sir! We've found that shipload of enemy troopers and...."
"And?! Are you engaging them?! What's your situation?"
"Well, sir...looks the enemy already took THEMSELVES out..."
"...what...?!"
(Shot of the Tactical Corps unit in dug-in position while below them, in plain sight, is a congregation of clone soldiers...
utterly zoned out....most of them are on the ground staring up into the sky with stupid grins on their faces...a few are staggering around, bumping into each other, waving their arms slowly...except for one hopping up and down flapping his arms...A few are looking at the guns in their hands, utterly entranced by the highlights shining off the plastic, or waving them slowly around...while other clones are watching the circles the gun muzzles make twirling in the air oh SO intently....others in the background are playing with strands of grass...or eating it....another one is trying to eat his uniform sash...and so on...suffice to say, NONE of them appear very belligerent...)

Meanwhile...aboard the Robotech Mothership.
Guard Centurion(glaring at medtech who's staring at the hypo in his hand): "You idiot! Pain serum! PAIN SERUM! -NOT SEDATIVES- YOU IMB(medtech jabs him with the hypo-FZZT-)Ieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee(thud)"

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Wed Oct 21, 2009 11:10 pm

Zor on first sampling the flower-of-life; "...whoa...colours."
Zor's second sample; "Y'know Regis... you look really pretty for a slug."
Zor's 3rd. sample; "Duudddeee... I know mecha-fu!"
Zor sobers up; "No seriously. I [censored] a slug?! :eek:

"

drewkitty ~..~ · Thu Oct 22, 2009 12:17 am

DhAkael wrote:Zor on first sampling the flower-of-life; "...whoa...colours."
Zor's second sample; "Y'know Regis... you look really pretty for a slug."
Zor's 3rd. sample; "Duudddeee... I know mecha-fu!"
Zor sobers up; "No seriously. I [censored] a slug?! "

I guess the regis never told him you aren't suppose to smoke it.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:47 am

DhAkael wrote:Zor on first sampling the flower-of-life; "...whoa...colours."
Zor's second sample; "Y'know Regis... you look really pretty for a slug."
Zor's 3rd. sample; "Duudddeee... I know mecha-fu!"
Zor sobers up; "No seriously. I [censored] a slug?! "

Regent: "WHATEVER possessed you to shag a monkey!? WHAT were you smoking, lady?!"

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:07 pm

DhAkael wrote:Zor on first sampling the flower-of-life; "...whoa...colours."
Zor's second sample; "Y'know Regis... you look really pretty for a slug."
Zor's 3rd. sample; "Duudddeee... I know mecha-fu!"
Zor sobers up; "No seriously. I [censored] a slug?! "

taalismn wrote:
DhAkael wrote:Zor on first sampling the flower-of-life; "...whoa...colours."
Zor's second sample; "Y'know Regis... you look really pretty for a slug."
Zor's 3rd. sample; "Duudddeee... I know mecha-fu!"
Zor sobers up; "No seriously. I [censored] a slug?! "

Regent: "WHATEVER possessed you to shag a monkey!? WHAT were you smoking, lady?!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Oct 23, 2009 4:48 pm

Rick Hunter and Lisa Hayes are having a lazy, non-confrontational, day at his apartment, just sitting on the sofa in the living room in their civvies, vegging out in peace...
(*WINDOW-SHAKING BOOM*)
...Out the front window, across the street, we see a fireball ascend from behind the neighbors' house...
Rick and Lisa are utterly unperturbed by this....
Lisa: "Stove?"
Rick: "Nah....too light, and it's coming from behind the Sterlings'...Gas grill..."
Lisa: "Barbeque?"
Rick: "Yeah...Max was talking about cooking outside..."
Lisa: "So, splashdown in Lake Michigan?"
Rick: "Nah....grill's too light...I'll bet escape velocity."
Lisa: "I'll check with Air Traffic Control and Near Space EWNet....Same stakes as before?"
Rick: "Yah...I'll say ten bucks on orbit. You?"
Lisa: "Lake Michigan."
Rick: "Poor Miriya...she really doesn want to learn how to cook..."

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Fri Oct 23, 2009 11:35 pm

taalismn wrote:Rick Hunter and Lisa Hayes are having a lazy, non-confrontational, day at his apartment, just sitting on the sofa in the living room in their civvies, vegging out in peace...
(*WINDOW-SHAKING BOOM*)
...Out the front window, across the street, we see a fireball ascend from behind the neighbors' house...
Rick and Lisa are utterly unperturbed by this....
Lisa: "Stove?"
Rick: "Nah....too light, and it's coming from behind the Sterlings'...Gas grill..."
Lisa: "Barbeque?"
Rick: "Yeah...Max was talking about cooking outside..."
Lisa: "So, splashdown in Lake Michigan?"
Rick: "Nah....grill's too light...I'll bet escape velocity."
Lisa: "I'll check with Air Traffic Control and Near Space EWNet....Same stakes as before?"
Rick: "Yah...I'll say ten bucks on orbit. You?"
Lisa: "Lake Michigan."
Rick: "Poor Miriya...she really doesn want to learn how to cook..."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:00 pm

Time Loop: Roy Fokker
"Honey, I think I'll SKIP the pineapple salad...maybe even not report for work...I think I'm coming down with the flu or something nasty..."

drewkitty ~..~ · Sat Oct 24, 2009 7:25 pm

taalismn wrote:Time Loop: Roy Fokker
"Honey, I think I'll SKIP the pineapple salad...maybe even not report for work...I think I'm coming down with the flu or something nasty..."

Or just show up blindingly drunk..... himmm.. that would work in RT, but not Macross.

Roy Folker L,DYR:"You can still Fly while Druunk"

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:21 pm

taalismn wrote:Time Loop: Roy Fokker
"Honey, I think I'll SKIP the pineapple salad...maybe even not report for work...I think I'm coming down with the flu or something nasty..."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Oct 25, 2009 2:09 pm

"Okay, who's in Skull One?!"
(shot of Lynn Kyle bond and gagged and shoved into a flight suit resembling Roy's, jammed behind the controls of Skull-1...now refitted to fly by remote control...Kyle's eyes roll up into his head as the fighter gets cat-launched to the music of the Crash Test Dummies...)...

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sun Oct 25, 2009 9:37 pm

taalismn wrote:"Okay, who's in Skull One?!"
(shot of Lynn Kyle bond and gagged and shoved into a flight suit resembling Roy's, jammed behind the controls of Skull-1...now refitted to fly by remote control...Kyle's eyes roll up into his head as the fighter gets cat-launched to the music of the Crash Test Dummies...)...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Oct 26, 2009 6:30 pm

Claudia Grant's List of Things To Do If I Ever Had to Do It All Over Again:

*'Accidentally' space Maistroff
* Run over Minmei(AFTER the Battle with Dolza's fleet)
*Hit Lisa(honestly, sometimes she can get so boneheaded)
*Hit ON Lisa(why not? Great way to relieve stress)
* Keep a paramedic's kit and blood plasma in my shipboard quarters
* Better yet, arrange to have my sister-in-law the doctor aboard the SDF-1 and invite her to dinner when Roy comes over after a firefight
* Have Roy Fokker's arms broken before a certain dogfight...even if I have to hire 'Shaft' to do it...
*Get a pet....either something like a good attack dog I can sic on Rick Hunter when he acts boneheaded, or a nice cat I can throw at Lisa when she's feeling down....
*Quit my tamiguichi habit...damn thing will just have to go 'hungry' when we're in the middle of a battle, damnit!

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Mon Oct 26, 2009 9:30 pm

taalismn wrote:Claudia Grant's List of Things To Do If I Ever Had to Do It All Over Again:

*'Accidentally' space Maistroff
* Run over Minmei(AFTER the Battle with Dolza's fleet)
*Hit Lisa(honestly, sometimes she can get so boneheaded)
*Hit ON Lisa(why not? Great way to relieve stress)
* Keep a paramedic's kit and blood plasma in my shipboard quarters
* Better yet, arrange to have my sister-in-law the doctor aboard the SDF-1 and invite her to dinner when Roy comes over after a firefight
* Have Roy Fokker's arms broken before a certain dogfight...even if I have to hire 'Shaft' to do it...
*Get a pet....either something like a good attack dog I can sic on Rick Hunter when he acts boneheaded, or a nice cat I can throw at Lisa when she's feeling down....
*Quit my tamiguichi habit...damn thing will just have to go 'hungry' when we're in the middle of a battle, damnit!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:09 am

"Hey, Angelo!"
"Lieutenant?"
"You see Polly anywhere?"
"You mean that strange looking dog you got?"
"It's a 'Pollinator', Angelo. Came in with me last night....You see him anywhere?"
"Can't say I have...when'd you last see it?"
"Last I saw Polly he was sleeping on a pile of laundry outside the service room. Didn't want to disturb him."
"Well, Phillips is charge of laundry today, ask him...He took a load in a while ago."
"Okay...probably nothing...that critter comes and goes as it ch--"
*GGGRRRAAAWWLLLLHHHHHH!!!*
"YARRRGGGHHHH!!!!"
"What the---?!"
"SEAN!"
------
"...louie...it came...otta...the dryer....fangs, claws, slavering jaws!...from the pit of hell!..."
"Hold still, Sean, I can't bandage you hands when you're waving them around like that!"
"But Polly's usually so well-behaved! What could have caused such a reaction?"
"I dunno, Dana...maybe being tumbled through a wash and dry cycle? Maybe being separated from its favorite blanket? Bad reaction to dryer sheets or fabric softener?"
"I don't care! I'm not doing laundry duty without full body armor! And a GUN! You hear me!?"

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:18 pm

taalismn wrote:"Hey, Angelo!"
"Lieutenant?"
"You see Polly anywhere?"
"You mean that strange looking dog you got?"
"It's a 'Pollinator', Angelo. Came in with me last night....You see him anywhere?"
"Can't say I have...when'd you last see it?"
"Last I saw Polly he was sleeping on a pile of laundry outside the service room. Didn't want to disturb him."
"Well, Phillips is charge of laundry today, ask him...He took a load in a while ago."
"Okay...probably nothing...that critter comes and goes as it ch--"
*GGGRRRAAAWWLLLLHHHHHH!!!*
"YARRRGGGHHHH!!!!"
"What the---?!"
"SEAN!"
------
"...louie...it came...otta...the dryer....fangs, claws, slavering jaws!...from the pit of hell!..."
"Hold still, Sean, I can't bandage you hands when you're waving them around like that!"
"But Polly's usually so well-behaved! What could have caused such a reaction?"
"I dunno, Dana...maybe being tumbled through a wash and dry cycle? Maybe being separated from its favorite blanket? Bad reaction to dryer sheets or fabric softener?"
"I don't care! I'm not doing laundry duty without full body armor! And a GUN! You hear me!?"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:02 pm

"Louie...you forgot it was your turn to clean out the lounge refrigerator again...."
"Did not.."
"You did...something GROWLED at me from behind the egg salad."
"That was the Lieutenant's pet..."
"Nope...Polly was on top of the cabinet, growling back at it..."
"Okay, so I was late last time, we had other things to deal with, what's the big deal?"
"Because the last time you forgot, Angelo needed anti-venom shots and a tetanus booster...and he STILL can't look at corned beef without getting the sweats..."
"Okay, okay...what you want me to do?"
"Meet me outside the mess kitchen in full battle gear...You, me, and Bowie are going to do a sweep of the room while Dante and Dana purge the ventilation and heating ducts leading out of there...hopefully we can get it before it escapes...Any idea what you might of forgotten in the fridge?"
"...uhmmm...might have neglected a tuna sandwich..."
"Great; we just have to keep it from taking to water then....I'll tell Dante to shut off the water as well..."

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 5:15 pm

Anatole Leonard 'Collecting his thoughts' in his personal, 5-star latrine facilities.
AL; "Ahhhh... another splendid day of power brokering, double dealing and alien anhilating. Life is good."
-buuurble-
AL; "What in blazes was that noise...wasn't me."
-Blorp-
*Gets off toilet and flushes*
AL; "Hmmm... need to get maintnence in here"
Leonard walks out, turning off the light; never noticing the ominus green glow eminating from under the toilet seat lid.

Meanwhile, back at 15th. ATAC

Angelo Dante; "Uh guys...I turned off the water. One problem. Something ATE through the sump's lining, and it wasn't Thursdays' chili..."

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Wed Oct 28, 2009 10:18 pm

taalismn wrote:"Louie...you forgot it was your turn to clean out the lounge refrigerator again...."
"Did not.."
"You did...something GROWLED at me from behind the egg salad."
"That was the Lieutenant's pet..."
"Nope...Polly was on top of the cabinet, growling back at it..."
"Okay, so I was late last time, we had other things to deal with, what's the big deal?"
"Because the last time you forgot, Angelo needed anti-venom shots and a tetanus booster...and he STILL can't look at corned beef without getting the sweats..."
"Okay, okay...what you want me to do?"
"Meet me outside the mess kitchen in full battle gear...You, me, and Bowie are going to do a sweep of the room while Dante and Dana purge the ventilation and heating ducts leading out of there...hopefully we can get it before it escapes...Any idea what you might of forgotten in the fridge?"
"...uhmmm...might have neglected a tuna sandwich..."
"Great; we just have to keep it from taking to water then....I'll tell Dante to shut off the water as well..."

DhAkael wrote:Anatole Leonard 'Collecting his thoughts' in his personal, 5-star latrine facilities.
AL; "Ahhhh... another splendid day of power brokering, double dealing and alien anhilating. Life is good."
-buuurble-
AL; "What in blazes was that noise...wasn't me."
-Blorp-
*Gets off toilet and flushes*
AL; "Hmmm... need to get maintnence in here"
Leonard walks out, turning off the light; never noticing the ominus green glow eminating from under the toilet seat lid.

Meanwhile, back at 15th. ATAC

Angelo Dante; "Uh guys...I turned off the water. One problem. Something ATE through the sump's lining, and it wasn't Thursdays' chili..."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Oct 29, 2009 10:06 am

Aboard the Masters' MOthership:

Sean Philips: "Strange place...intense lighting, air conditioning going flat out..strange plants all over the place...wonder what they're growing here...doesn't LOOK like food..."
Nameless Trooper:"Dope"
Philips: "WHAT?!"
Nameless: "It's dope sir...My brother's a cop...he's described enough drug busts that I'd recognize a dope greenhouse anywhere! This is cannibis!"
Philips: "You gotta be kidding me! Aliens growing mary jane?!"
(Meanwhile)
Terminator(to partner): "It's the COPS! They found our growing operation! We gotta snuff'em before they bring the rest of the narcs!"

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Thu Oct 29, 2009 10:30 pm

taalismn wrote:Aboard the Masters' MOthership:

Sean Philips: "Strange place...intense lighting, air conditioning going flat out..strange plants all over the place...wonder what they're growing here...doesn't LOOK like food..."
Nameless Trooper:"Dope"
Philips: "WHAT?!"
Nameless: "It's dope sir...My brother's a cop...he's described enough drug busts that I'd recognize a dope greenhouse anywhere! This is cannibis!"
Philips: "You gotta be kidding me! Aliens growing mary jane?!"
(Meanwhile)
Terminator(to partner): "It's the COPS! They found our growing operation! We gotta snuff'em before they bring the rest of the narcs!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Oct 30, 2009 4:40 pm

This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

keir451 · Unread post by **keir451** » Sat Oct 31, 2009 6:12 am

taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

Wait you mean there IS a difference? Maybe Dana should just go and... Dana, undressing in front of Zor as Zor mopes, "C'mon Zor, you can't keep this up forever." Zor, "I must atone for my many crimes". Dana, "That DOES IT!!!" pounces on Zor like a Puma on its prey,'You're MINE now buster!!!", Fade out to sounds of Lovemaking(pleasure/torture?) in Dana's quarters.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Oct 31, 2009 9:16 am

keir451 wrote:
taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

Wait you mean there IS a difference? Maybe Dana should just go and... Dana, undressing in front of Zor as Zor mopes, "C'mon Zor, you can't keep this up forever." Zor, "I must atone for my many crimes". Dana, "That DOES IT!!!" pounces on Zor like a Puma on its prey,'You're MINE now buster!!!", Fade out to sounds of Lovemaking(pleasure/torture?) in Dana's quarters.

Dana: "So...I should wear the Red Demoness outfit and use the whip? Or the Inquisition Nun? Maybe the Avenging Angel?"
Marie Crystal: "Dana, I'm not sure you want to shave your head bald for the 'Regis' Look...."
Dana: "..blah!..."

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Sun Nov 01, 2009 2:06 am

taalismn wrote:
keir451 wrote:
taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

Wait you mean there IS a difference? Maybe Dana should just go and... Dana, undressing in front of Zor as Zor mopes, "C'mon Zor, you can't keep this up forever." Zor, "I must atone for my many crimes". Dana, "That DOES IT!!!" pounces on Zor like a Puma on its prey,'You're MINE now buster!!!", Fade out to sounds of Lovemaking(pleasure/torture?) in Dana's quarters.

Dana: "So...I should wear the Red Demoness outfit and use the whip? Or the Inquisition Nun? Maybe the Avenging Angel?"
Marie Crystal: "Dana, I'm not sure you want to shave your head bald for the 'Regis' Look...."
Dana: "..blah!..."

Dana walks into her personal quarters, dressed in "modified" combat armour, decorated with Fluer de-lis' and her hair bleached white and flat ironed. Zor, chained to the bunk is gob smacked.

Dana; "In the name of the holy-throne, you shall pay for your crimes heretic." As the right gauntlet starts to hum (yes Louie is a sick sick sick man, but so is Ms. Sterling) dana approaches "..Prepare to recive 'the Emporoers Justice'."

Zor Prime; "...Mommy...help?" :eek:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Nov 01, 2009 11:19 am

Dante: "What the H---?! Louie, did you just see that?!"
Louie: "What?"
Dante: "I coulda sworn I just saw Zor rappel butt-naked onto the front lawn of the barracks, with a broken handcuff on his wrists, then go running off..."
Louie: "Butt-naked Zor? I DEFINITELY did not see that." How long have you been seeing male squadmates naked, Dante?"
Dante: "Don't start, Louie! Or I'll start remembering whose idea it was to overstarch the Lieutenant's 'delicates'..."
Louie: "Okay, okay! Really, Dante, I doubt there's anybody out there! I mean, they'd run into the Rottweilers..."
BARK!BARK!BARK!Yaiiieeeeee!!!!
Louie: "Which would chase any such unfortunate into the new electrified fence...
*ZZZZTTTTTTTT**OOoowwwiiiieeeee!!!
Louie:"...and into the new minefield..."
*BOOM*Yooouuupppppppppppp!!!!
Dante: "You think we maybe ought to investigate..."
Louie: "I heard nothing...besides, you really want to see a butt-naked Zor again...er, provided you saw him a FIRST time..."
Dante: "No....I saw and heard nothing...."

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sun Nov 01, 2009 11:01 pm

taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

keir451 wrote:
taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

Wait you mean there IS a difference? Maybe Dana should just go and... Dana, undressing in front of Zor as Zor mopes, "C'mon Zor, you can't keep this up forever." Zor, "I must atone for my many crimes". Dana, "That DOES IT!!!" pounces on Zor like a Puma on its prey,'You're MINE now buster!!!", Fade out to sounds of Lovemaking(pleasure/torture?) in Dana's quarters.

taalismn wrote:
keir451 wrote:
taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

Wait you mean there IS a difference? Maybe Dana should just go and... Dana, undressing in front of Zor as Zor mopes, "C'mon Zor, you can't keep this up forever." Zor, "I must atone for my many crimes". Dana, "That DOES IT!!!" pounces on Zor like a Puma on its prey,'You're MINE now buster!!!", Fade out to sounds of Lovemaking(pleasure/torture?) in Dana's quarters.

Dana: "So...I should wear the Red Demoness outfit and use the whip? Or the Inquisition Nun? Maybe the Avenging Angel?"
Marie Crystal: "Dana, I'm not sure you want to shave your head bald for the 'Regis' Look...."
Dana: "..blah!..."

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Sun Nov 01, 2009 11:03 pm

DhAkael wrote:
taalismn wrote:
keir451 wrote:
taalismn wrote:This is Zor:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime:
"Errrr....I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
This is Zor Prime on drugs:
"...aooowwwww...I'm pathetic...I must atone for my many crimes...."
Can you tell the difference?

Wait you mean there IS a difference? Maybe Dana should just go and... Dana, undressing in front of Zor as Zor mopes, "C'mon Zor, you can't keep this up forever." Zor, "I must atone for my many crimes". Dana, "That DOES IT!!!" pounces on Zor like a Puma on its prey,'You're MINE now buster!!!", Fade out to sounds of Lovemaking(pleasure/torture?) in Dana's quarters.

Dana: "So...I should wear the Red Demoness outfit and use the whip? Or the Inquisition Nun? Maybe the Avenging Angel?"
Marie Crystal: "Dana, I'm not sure you want to shave your head bald for the 'Regis' Look...."
Dana: "..blah!..."

Dana walks into her personal quarters, dressed in "modified" combat armour, decorated with Fluer de-lis' and her hair bleached white and flat ironed. Zor, chained to the bunk is gob smacked.

Dana; "In the name of the holy-throne, you shall pay for your crimes heretic." As the right gauntlet starts to hum (yes Louie is a sick sick sick man, but so is Ms. Sterling) dana approaches "..Prepare to recive 'the Emporoers Justice'."

Zor Prime; "...Mommy...help?"

taalismn wrote:Dante: "What the H---?! Louie, did you just see that?!"
Louie: "What?"
Dante: "I coulda sworn I just saw Zor rappel butt-naked onto the front lawn of the barracks, with a broken handcuff on his wrists, then go running off..."
Louie: "Butt-naked Zor? I DEFINITELY did not see that." How long have you been seeing male squadmates naked, Dante?"
Dante: "Don't start, Louie! Or I'll start remembering whose idea it was to overstarch the Lieutenant's 'delicates'..."
Louie: "Okay, okay! Really, Dante, I doubt there's anybody out there! I mean, they'd run into the Rottweilers..."
BARK!BARK!BARK!Yaiiieeeeee!!!!
Louie: "Which would chase any such unfortunate into the new electrified fence...
*ZZZZTTTTTTTT**OOoowwwiiiieeeee!!!
Louie:"...and into the new minefield..."
*BOOM*Yooouuupppppppppppp!!!!
Dante: "You think we maybe ought to investigate..."
Louie: "I heard nothing...besides, you really want to see a butt-naked Zor again...er, provided you saw him a FIRST time..."
Dante: "No....I saw and heard nothing...."

Sgt. Schultze anyone?

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 02, 2009 4:54 pm

As Zor Prime is frantically racing over electrified fences, evading raging guard dogs, and tiptoeing among the land mines, while in search of a pair of bolt cutters and pants, to his astonishment he sees Sean Philips in a similar state of...well...un-uniformedness- racing in the OPPOSITE direction....
As the two come opposite each other, Sean yells to Zor: "Dana?"
Zor nods, an obvious question on his face...
Philips: "Marie. She's getting REAL possessive of late..." as he runs to clear the first set of electrified wires on his way back to the barracks...

Alpha 11 · Unread post by **Alpha 11** » Mon Nov 02, 2009 11:40 pm

Harry Leferts wrote:
Alpha 11 wrote: Sgt. Schultze anyone?

Dante: (Heavy german accent) I know Nothing!

Signed,
Harry Leferts

taalismn wrote:As Zor Prime is frantically racing over electrified fences, evading raging guard dogs, and tiptoeing among the land mines, while in search of a pair of bolt cutters and pants, to his astonishment he sees Sean Philips in a similar state of...well...un-uniformedness- racing in the OPPOSITE direction....
As the two come opposite each other, Sean yells to Zor: "Dana?"
Zor nods, an obvious question on his face...
Philips: "Marie. She's getting REAL possessive of late..." as he runs to clear the first set of electrified wires on his way back to the barracks...

With what those two ladies go through, is it any wander they are like that?