randomer item table

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 10:14 am

#59

One helmet that looks to be from some sort of pilots armour from a fighter plane. Call sign "Starbuck". Seems to have been heavily abused.

8]

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Sat Feb 14, 2009 9:42 am

#60

A crude looking device that looks to be a weapon cobbled together from a rusty lawn mower blade, a pilot light, a motor cycle fuel tank and a hand brake lever from a motorcycle.

Rockwolf66 · Unread post by **Rockwolf66** » Sun Feb 15, 2009 4:31 am

Can I get a compiled copy of all the previous lists?

#61: a Combat Spork

#62: A Munchkin Fairy

#63: a 1970 Chevy Muscle car.

Rockwolf66 · Unread post by **Rockwolf66** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 2:58 am

Well I guess that I'm the guy collecting these things and posting the complete lists.

01: A cardboard box, with a Fed Ex label addressed to Detective David Mills. It's sealed and has dried blood around the corners.

"WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"
02: a sealed package with "do not open till (that day's date)" Inside being 3 dozen ampuals of a yellowish substance.
#03 A randomer item list list (and yes that was supposed to be double) that allows you to figure out which randomer item list your going to use.
# 04.

A pair of d10. Can be used to roll on the randomer item list list, if so desired.
05 a box containing a full set of Ikea Stainless Steal Flatware.
06- Jimmy Hoffa alive playing strip poker with Janis Joplin and losing
# 07

A pink plastic flamingo. They eyes glow red when approched, but it harmless to the first person touching or picking it up.

If placed standing up on it's feet and then left behind, it will then be activated. When something comes within a 5 foot radius, it detonates with all the force and effects of a plasma mini-missile.
08- A certificate of birth For Nostrous Dunscon with Joesph Proseck's father's name on it.
#09 (I don't know if this has been done before)
A cargo container full of knockoff C-10/C-12 rifles, They are made of neon colored plastic and while they are exactly the same (Weight, Range ect) as standard issue weapons, They do not deal any damage. (Training arms?)
# 10 A Certificate of Marriage with Karl Prosek and Erin Tarn's names written on it and signed (real).
11 a horse and saddle in a stassis chamber. Its alive, and a fully trained riding horse. Then saddle is of high quality with some silver embelishments. The saddle bags containing oats. (horse feed), and 100,000 in old US dollors.
12. Boneshaker the Cybersex Kitten aka. Nii the Suicidegirl.

13. the mint condition book "Care and feeding of Cyberpuppies" by Teirdes. Laying close by is a chewed on IAR-3 leg.
14. A TW slinky that walks upstairs. Makes a slinkety sound.
15. A winning ticket from a Pre-Cataclysm lottery that would have been worth fifty million dollars.
# 16

A $10,000 biro, capable of writing in 0-g enviroments. Next to it is a $0.49 lead pencil. Also capable of writing in a 0-g enviroment.
#17

A staple-remover that radiates supernatural evil. It isn't dangerous. Yet.

#18

A leerjet. Works like an ordinary jet, but you can't shake the feeling that it's undressing you with its eyes.
#19

A Hydrogen Derrigible armored with a soft dense metal (completely SDC and totally useless). An old disk player on board powered from an unknown source continuously replays a song... something dealing with stairs and heaven. It does float and is powered by the same unknown power supply as the disk player, so it can "fly". (Thanks Brisco County Jr.)
#20

A black 1cu ft. (1000 MDC) box with a red button under a flip up (250 MDC) glass panel. The box has the words: "DO NOT PUSH" written on it. (What happens when the button is pushed is up to the GM but it should be VERY unpleasant)
#21

A gigantic room with a floor which is covered with a highly detailed map of Pre-Apocolypse Earth. In a box on Antarctica are four grey foot tall mushroom shaped plastic pices. If anyone places one of those pieces on the board they will not notice anything different, except the piece can't be picked up again. If any piece is placed near their location, wich is marked with a green dot on the map, they will notice... something as would have anyone in the real locations they placed the other pieces.
#22

A cow's brain in a jar. Slightly used, but serviceable -- a perfect replacement should your cow ever be badly damaged.
#23: A 4 foot tall robotic replica of Optimus Prime. It has a computer AI mind controlling it and will be loyal to whoever turns it on, (it is found off). It can even transform into a truck like on the cartoon! It can talk but only says things like "Transform and roll out!" and "Let's kick some decepti-tail!".

Stats: IQ 14, ME N/A, MA 11, PS 13, PP 12, PE 20, PB N/A, SPD 12 or 45 MPH in vehicle mode. Physical stats are robotic.
MDC by location: Head 10, Body 40, Arm (2) 15, Leg (2) 15. It has an energy blaster that does 2d6 MDC with a range of 700 feet. The rate of fire is single shots and he can shoot 3 times a melee, can also do aimed shots. Won't fight hand-to-hand, only fights using its energy blaster. It has a nuclear power cell with a 20 year lifespan.
Bonuses: +2 initiative, +2 parry and dodge, +2 to strike with energy blaster (in addition to any bonuses gained from doing an aimed shot, etc).
#24 A 12' long #2 pencil. Anything it draws comes to life. Anything it drew or that is clearly a cartoon character like Optimus Prime or Floopers can be erased... good luck catching the floopers.
# 25.

A very fancy, expensive looking pen. With the cap on, it looks like a fine, cavalry sabre. Close examination, the pen seems to be able to be twisted in the middle. With the cap off, when twisted, it pushes the pen nib out so you can write with it. Twisted with the cap on, it becomes a full sized sabre.
#26 A REALLY thick novel entitled War and Peace. Roll a D20 versus MA. If the roll is over MA your driven to read it. What ever the condition of the world is War or Peace it will be the opposite once the book is completed. The player will not know, but they were placed in a pocket dimension and will not tire, grow hungry, bored of the book or have to use the bathroom... oh and time passed, only about 100 years and the peace won't necessarily last that long.
# 27

Another pen. This one is an old fashion caligraphy pen, with a sharp nib. No ink bottle is found, but the pen has a never ending supply of ink.

This pen can be used to create Magic Tattoos!!

When drawn on a person, the tattoo will behave the same way at a magic tattoo it depicts. Thus a tiger tattoo will summon a tiger, and a broken chain tattoo will grant supernatural strength.

It's not for free however. Firstly, it still costs the same amount of PPE to activate the tattoo. Secondly, and the greatest cost of all, is the permanent loss of those PPE expended to activate the tattoos!!!

Unless the propper research is conducted first, such as taking to Laslo or such, to get identified, noone will know about the PPE loss untill someone looses enough so they can no longer activate any tattoos.

Obviously, this means little to soldiers and the like, but obviously is the bane of all magic users!!
#28 a spikey haired plush yellow novelty doll with a pull string that says "Eat my shorts, Cowabunga, and do the Bartman."
#29 a plush doll of a little Jewish boy that when you squeeze it, it says "Oh my god you killed kenny... you BASTARD!"
#30) A model ship in a bottle. Roll to see what ship:
01-10: HMS Enterprise - ancient sailing ship
11-20: USS Enterprise - ancient aircraft carrier
21-30: USS Ticonderoga - super subcarrier
31-40: NGR Poseidon - super subcarrier
41-50: USS Missouri - ancient battleship
51-60: Exxon Valdez - can't tell. Lots of black oil on the inside of the bottle.
61-70: CVS Prometheus - super subcarrier
71-80: SLV Daedulus - super sub ambiphious assault ship
81-90: Horune Dreamship
91-00: RMS Titanic - ancient passenger liner. Model is broken in half.
#31 as above except the bottle shows the current status of the craft, including moving parts, location (within the area of the bottle), even people on deck and the firing of weapons. It is not live time though only the equivalent of one still frame per minute is seen. Shaking the bottle has NO effect on the "inhabitants". If the bottle is open nothing poors out but the image starts to fade, recapping it will not renew the image and will only keep it from further degrading. If the image completely dissipates a circuit card with LEDs and some sort of receiver can be seen at the base of the bottle.
#32

While traveling across the wilderness, the party see something glinting in the distance. What they find is a very large, wooden skull of some predator. It's as large as a two story house, and carved out of some type of hard wood, bleached near white from long exposure to the sun and the elements.

Or is it? Close examination will reveal that while made of wood, the skull has all the usual markings, growth patterns, muscle anchorage points, fused bone from past fractures.

If the party decide to dig down into the ground next to the base of the skull, they'll find a vertebrae....
#33 A PC trips. Looking back to see what it was, they see part of a metal loop sticking out from the ground. If a player pulls it out it begins to glow and a note on a piece of paper (which has miraculously survived all the elements) reads "For my lover may the challenges this brings guide you to your rebirth, I'll see you in the Spring." Everyone in the party gets the strong feeling that it needs to be put down IMMEDIATELY... except the holder, who is enthralled with it.
#34

A small box of wooden toothpicks. (Some look slightly used)
#35.

A small square of cardboard, seems to be the back of a small cardboard box. One the shiny side, is the instructions on how to use toothpicks.
#36

A small box filled with assorted seeds.
1- Roses
2- Daisies
3- Pumpkin
4- Lillies
5- Sunflowers
6- Tulips
7- Tomatoes
8- Corn
9- Green Beans
37 - jimmy hoffa
38

a door appears infront of the character, if opened it transports the entire party to the beginning of the campaign. the party will lose 10% of XP and knowledge of every thing that happened between the time the campaign began and they opened the door every min for 10 min.
#39 a post it note that fell of of the door in #38. It reads "Do not open door... I forget why."
40

a pet midgit
41: a small beaten up and badly abused cardboard box about 2ft square in size. after looking inside the box one would find that it was filled with nothingness ... the vast nothingness of an alternate universe!
42: the character's discover the meaning of life ... the double DVD platinum collectors edition.
43: A battered looking sea- chest. Contains a bottle of rum, a pirate eye- patch, a sextant, a stuffed parrot, a rusty cutlass, a foldable telescope and a map with a big red X in the middle.
44. Jesus.
45. A hula-hoop bobble doll for the dash of a vehicle. When the bobble doll starts to really bobble (vehicle on rough terrain), the vehicle magically doesn't leave any tracks. Completely useless for flying vehicles.
46: a single pair of elvis presley boxer shorts, glows in the dark. still in the original packaging

47: a singing trout

48: a pickled toe in a jar.
#49

A barrel of monkeys.

If opened near a leyline, instead of plastic monkeys, a pack of winged, flying monkeys flies out of the barrel and will attack all in the area. Use the stats of a lesser demon, according to your groups power level. There will be 2d4 + 1 per character in the group.

If you can summon Jefe, the monkeys will fly back into the barrel in terror. Otherwise, after attacking the party for 2 minutes, they will fly off into the distance.

If opened in the presence of a Rift, they will have the stats of a Balrog or like demon. Hope the party is powerful!!
#50 When traveling through tornado alley the party finds what appears to be two curled up stalkings, found under the corner of a house.
#51. MY DAM CAR KEYS!!!
52. The Cosmic Forge coloring book complete with Universal Map
#53. A counting book with the numbers between 51 and 99 torn out.
#54 (? Maybe?)

A Lesser Limitless Rod of Frost.
Casts magical homing frost bolts that do 6d6 SDC up to a range of 400 feet. The rod works an infinite number of times but once activated only lasts for 48 hours and then disintegrates. (1 bolt per melee action.)
Stay tuned for the Greater Limitless Rod of Frost later this evening.
#55 ... the partially filmed but never released [and somewhat prophetic] Rifts Movie still in a film can. is actually only good for stock footage. this item is cursed and whoever has it in their possession will find themselves unable to complete any tasks that they set out to do, leaving them all half finished and incomplete.

#56 ... a zombyfied talking head. the damn thing is cursed to forever talk your bloody ear off and will not shut up. once found it magically travels with the character wherever they happen to go. if they leave it behind, it will teleport to their exact location [say appear in their backpack, passenger seat of their vehicle or hotel room for example]. there is also something about it that reminds you of your now late grandmother who constantly nagged at you for not doing anything important with your life.

#57 ... a partially eaten 6 foot long sub sandwich that looks like it was left behind a home furnace for about a month. this item is also cursed, and the first person to find it is filled with an irresistible urge to eat it and the character will not be able to throw it away either. "can't let a good sandwich go to waste"
#58 sureptitiously renumberd #54 because #54 was too serious A great big box of a rare element... common sense, especially when dealing with the knowledge that with so many pages it is quite likely that more than one randomer item list exists in this thread.

If you go through all of it you will realize that there is at least 3 different lists and though a number or three have been skipped we do know... generally, how to count from 1 to a hundred. So though America may have its educational issues being able to read from first post to last is not one of them. BTW if you look through the pages you will find that each list has been consolidated into a single post... eventually.
59: Homeworld Cataclysm
60: A Wookie Bowcaster
61: Sanity
62: Poo
63# ... a super-duper-giga-pooper-scooper
#64

An ever plentiful container of toothpicks.

#65

An everclean spittoon. These two items are cherished out West.

#66

A set of Victorian silverware. When used correctly, will give a +15% bonus
to skills used during dinner. Eg, Oratory type skills used during discussion over the meal.

#67

A set of vintage fireproof racing drivers underclothing. Can be worn under body armour if desired. Will halve all sdc based fire damage. No protection to mdc fire damage. Will give a social bonus of +10% to any Operator or Driver/Pilot Occ.

#68

A pair of vintage sneakers. Gives a +10% to prowl in an urban enviroment.

#69 - whoopie cushion
70# ... a pair of tweezers capable of high jacking a CS plane.

71# ... a full pardon signed by Proseck

72# ... a garden gnome, actually a miniature golem.

73# ... the holy grail
#74 ... an Abacus and a Slide Rule. both are magically enchanted to do mathematic equations by dictation (98% skill level)
#75: you find 98 Moon bridge', a magical passage that will allow anyone that passes through to appear on the surface of the moon. While on the surface of the moon you also find a set of #74.
#76

A pair of runners. Adds +1d4 to your Speed Attribute while worn.
#77: A corpse. If DNA and carbon dating are performed it will be descovered to be your own body ...only its 200 years old!
#78:A warehouse filled to brim with hundreds of pre-rifts guns and equipment. Curiously, everthing has a a label on it that says "Property of Paramount Studios".

#79 Your traveling through Arkansas when you find a corpse DNA testing shows that it's you... but the corpse has an ID with a picture of you but with your fathers name showing that he is under the age of 21 and what must be a fake ID with your grandfathers name. You always wondered why your dad said you were a chip off the old block... guess you need to go find that Rift now and get your grandma and mom :ewww: pregnant with you... and you... so what is your son going to be like... never mind. Hey isn't the universe supposed to implode if you do stuff like that?
#80 A hard copy record of the last few pages of this thread. Save vs. coma or be forced to look at the pages. After "reading" it (even the illiterate can somehow do so) the character is utterly confused and will forget what s/he is doing. To make matters worse that character will ask other to see if they can understand it. It is the thread that never ends it goes on and on my friend somebody started posting on it not knowing what it was and they'll continue posting on it just because... (rinse and repeat until brain is clean)
#81- A Mysterious box. It has an interrogation sign on it, because it's mysterious. If someone tries to open it, it will explode making 6D6 MD to a 3x3 area of efect.

Nobody can leave a mysterious box closed
#82 A 10' pole. If someone holding the pole attempts to touch something with the pole they can't. Benefit??? Nothing can touch someone holding the 10' pole... including the ground they walkED on.
#83.

A can of Spam. When opened, it reveals a mass of compacted, pink, jellified 'meat' like substance. Though it bears little taste, it makes for a great 'filler' in salads & omelettes. When added to a meal in this way, it cures either 1d4x10 SDC, HP or MDC. Served thusly, it will serve/cure 4 people. Eaten straight from the can, it will cure 1d6x10, but only for one person, who will eat all the contents within the can. However, the individual in question will feel slightly ill, with a -1/-10 to all dice rolls.
84.2001 A Space Odessy

85. Coalition Recruitment poster
86. NEMA Recruitment poster
#87

A Palladium recruitment poster.
#88. a signed copy of Rifts
#89 ... a cursed version of SPAM (no, not a can of Stuff Posing As Meat). once this mysterious item is found the character is constantly bombarded by advertisements. whenever the character is near a billboard or a poster or any other sort of advertisement, the advertisement comes to life and verbally assaults the character with a barrage of rantings that are related to the advertisement itself. only the cursed character can hear these constant and nattering verbal barrages making them look quite unstable should they be seen having a conversation with a billboard.
#90 An invitation for dinner for you from XYZ. The person who finds this can show it to anyone and that person will understand that, that household has invited the player(s) to dinner. The dinner will be friendly and hospitable (even topics of religion or government will not upset either side... even if disgusted by certain viewpoints) even if both sides normally despise each other (the character(s) can use this to garner information which would be talked about at a table among friends but will not be able to draw out classified or higher information. Either side will also not be able to attack.) At the end all dinner guests will remember who was there and what was said but will wake up in there own beds (nifty way to teleport back home too... could be lame for some people.)
#91. A early 21st century laptop still connect to a website posting board called Forums of the Megaverse.
#92. a case of plastic Robots who can change into cars, trucks, airplane , handguns , and dinosuars
#93. a trailer of box of small blocks of different sizes and colors in various themes, themes include a space opera, space explorer, underwater, city ,farming , sports and animals.
#94: A green plush doll of some D-bee with multiple tentacles over its mouth wearing a rhinestoe encrusted high collared jumpsuit.
#95. The Complete First Season of The Biggest Loser
#96 ... a complete list (if not a little disorganized) of all the random things that you might come across.
#97 A snide comment on a piece of paper that mentions how many times random lists appear in a random list making it not quite so random.
#98 A copy of the Rifts coloring book... you suddenly notice that you are just a line drawing with no color... and so is the world around you.
#99 A murder wraith that continuously recites the part in Hamlet with Horatio's skull.
#100 Some moron sitting and a long dead computer clapping gleefully while chanting I finally got 100... I finally got 100. If he is touched you suddenly get Zer0 K@y'ed and forget everything. EVERYTHING, what you were doing there, why your touching this guy, who you are, what that thing is at the end of that other thing that is touching that thing and most of all to breath.

And the last one.

#1 the Entire DVD collection of anything Bruce Cambel appeared in, A book entitled "If Chins could talk" and a case Old Spice.

#2. a cup of coins with some mutant mouse face on the coins.

#3: Electric Razor and several attachments, Bikini and a bottle taquilla.

#4 a "lucky" rabbit foot(hope it bring more luck to you then it did the rabbit)

#5 ... a little box about the size of a small childs toy. when turned upside down it says "Oh God, Please Make This Stop" in a slow weezy, mechanical whine. when turned over the other way it says "Why Won't This End"

#6: A small plastic sign that reads "How do you keep an idiot busy? see other side"

Number Seven at last: A Talking Wombat Named Steve with a backpack mounted Wilks Laser Pistol.

#8 The other side of the sign that says "How do you keep an idiot busy? see other side"

#9 a simular sign to 8 and 6 with the addition of bullet holes... you also hear dueling banjos in the distance.

#10 - Wiffle ball bat....

#11 - A DVD of Monty Python's Holy Grail being guarded by a Rabbit.

#12.a rabbit gurded by a monty python

#13 A soild suit of armor lying infront of a rabbit.

#14 The wiffle ball to number ten is found... several miles away from the bat.
#15: A bag of alien pretzels. Interestingly enough they are formed into shapes that the Megaverse has decreed are impossible ...roll to save V.S. Insanity at a -3.

If you fail you gain a permanent +1 to save V.S. Insanity as your mind has already seen and explained away a true conundrum.

If you succeed you gain a permanent fear of *true shapes*, sorry, even Elder Beings aren't supposed to comprehend a level of existence as fundamental as *true shapes*.

*true shapes* = I leave it up to your own imagination as to what "true shapes" are.

# 16.

1d6+5 packets of Magic Gumtm (the kind that pops when you place it in your mouth).

When chewed and placed on a wound, heals, 3d6 SDC, 2d6 HP, or 1d4 MDC. If placed on a piece of damaged armour (body armour, PA, vehicle armour...), restores 1d3+3 MDC, or 1d6x10 SDC.

If the total is more than the maximum allowed, it's retained for 1d6x20 minutes, before dissipating.

If chewed and placed on a pierced spacesuit or spaceship hull, it will remain intact and repressurized for 2d6x10 minutes.

If placed in a fluid straight from the packet, it will render any poison neutral.

If sprinkled onto food, it will make it taste like a banquet, no matter how poor the food actually is.

There are reputed to be many more uses for this Magic Gum, more then even the unknown inventor had planned.

# 17 New Lazlo Barbie

# 18: A rare and powerful runic statue known as the "Golden Goblin of the fourth Age". Amongst its many powers are the abilities to mesmerize "weavers of the black arts" and can "cut a shine" like nobodies business.

#19 Cursed Battle furty blade that causes you to strike yourself on the second attack, cannot be controlled. When you strike someone, it automatically comes back and strikes you.

GM's can have fun with this one....

#20 A compendium of "Yo Mama" insults

#21 Talisman that looks just like the Altarian Blind Womens force field one, but instead a genie that looks like 50 cent comes out and starts rapping.

22 - Old Cheeeseburger....

#23 A print of Scream, except it looks like Cherico.

#24 The complete DVD collection of Carrot Top. Any member of the party who watches it must roll vs H.F. 18. A failed roll results in said PC destroying the video player and must make a save vs. insanity at -7. A failed save results in a psychosis, 50% probability of permenance, in which the PC will be sent into a violent rage at the sight of red hair and/or gag props.....

#25 A set of kitchen knives in mint condition and a DVD set of Emeril Live. Characters watching the vid gain the basic Cook skill at +10%, characters who already have the Cook skill gain +20% and are able to cook on a professional level.

Watchers of the vid, however, must save vs insanity at +2 or develop a permenant nerosis, causing them to exclaim "BAM!" any time spices or alcohol is used in any dish. In the wild, such an exclamation isn't a great idea.....

26 The missing giant two pronged fork from the set in #25... and a video of the "Ewwweee, I guarantee" cajun chef guy.

# 27 My sanity and money. I know i put 'em some where!? Chuck

#28 yOu FinD yOuR MiND... and Now EVeRy WaNTs a PIEce of iT.
If anyone picks this up it causes everyone else to desire it, they become agressive. Crazies can't help but pick it up

#29 - Talking skull, yells random sayings/insanities every 5 minutes....

"watch out"

"you're a great companion"

"you suck"

"I love you"

ect ect...

Once and hour, will pretend to tell the future
"the path you're on is dark......might want to turn back"

"I know what you're thinking.............and I think you should do it"
ect ect....

#30 - Pouch filled with needles and a clear glass bottle with clear liquid labeled "Horse Steroids" on the bottle.

#31: http://img490.imageshack.us/img490/9979 ... fh7bv5.jpg

32%-New Kids on the block single cassette tape (all those who listen to it must roll for a random insanity immediately!)

33% an Oscar.

34% a DVD labeled "Spice Girls Go To Hue Henfer's" in NTSC format...so no DVD player in NA will play it, sorry!

#35- A set of ten sided dice that when rolled will convert any percent signs to number signs, within a 20' area.

36% a map to the nearest hostess factory

#37- A leather map tube is found on the ground. On it you read
On the ground
on a wall
On your chest
Does not matter
you will dig
and dig without rest.

Inside the tube is a map which has an aged map of the area with a dashed line that goes from where you happened to pick it up through accurate landmarks to an X. As you move the line will shorten and the map will become more detailed. The map will lead to the nearest X which is marking "the spot." If the character follows the map and finds the X they will be overcome with the urge to command everyone to dig. People on the X have a 5% chance of resisting the command +1%/foot beyond 5', so at 95' it has no effect. Where the X is doesn't matter the tube is supposed to read On the ground; On the wall; On the chest; Does not matter; you will dig; and dig without rest. How to avoid... don't open the tube or don't follow the map to the end.

#38

A heavily chewed stick. Closer inspection reveals that the stick has been chewed upon by something with sharp teeth, like some sort of carnivore. Did I mention that the stick is about the size of a large tree trunk? In fact, it is a large tree trunk, and is the favourate chew toy of a Rhino Buffalo that has undergone a M.O.M conversion by some demented cyber-scientist (who also became a short lived chew toy...).

The Rhino-Buffalo (aka Buffy), has lost his favourate chew toy and will by mighty angry when he finds someone else playing with his 'stick'.

39 - The Cosmic Forge on vacation...Any reaction except completely ignoring it will result in the character being instantly and permanently removed from the Universe, dropped onto Dyvaal with a 30 metre tall glowing arrow floating above and behind the character, and an overwhelming need to spend the rest of his/her (now) immortal life tossing "Yo Mama" comments at everything that moves. (And promptly forgetting the fatal beating then received upon regaining consciousness.)

And you thought the Forge's sense of humour ended with the "kick me" sign on the back of the robe of the TGE Emperor...

40 - An I.O.U. from Splyncryth for several billion Galactic Credits...in the finder's name. Payable on demand. (Forged, but, hey...only Splyncryth and the GM know that niggly little detail).

41---Knuckle Sandwich
A massively built Juicer with a mohawk, and enough gold trim and jewelry on his arms and harness rig/body armor to qualify as a Glitterboy runs out of nowhere, screaming 'Fool!", punches/slaps 1d4 random PCs, then goes running back to where-ever he came from...

42: A random nuke.

43. A small William Shatner doll, that when picked up, turns into the real thing, only is now MDC. And he. Wont. Shut. Up. Ever. No. Matter. What. And he decided to stay with the person who touched him. Forever.

#44.

A Turncoat. This is a high fashion longcoat, that has been made out of the top of the line MDC materials to give protection to the wearer. MDC to be determined by the GM.

However, this coat makes the wearer turn on his friends & family. At first, it's just minor things, like waking up the next morning and thinking 'this guys a jerk', when they've been life long mates. Over a period of 6 months, it goes from a minor dislike, to complete hatred. So much in fact, that after 6 months to the day, the very next argument will make the wearer go completely ballistic.

When this happens, the coat grants 2000 MDC, a force field that had 500 MDC which regenerates at 20MDC a round. It also grants the abilities to See the Invisible, Fly, Impervious to Energy and Invisibility (Superior), as well as an aura of Fear, all at 10th level of effect if applicable.

The coat can only be discarded if destroyed, or some other method determined by the GM.

45. Another mans shoes.

The first being to place them on their feet is forced to walk a mile (direction determined by the GM) to see how it feels. At the end of this walk the player gets to make another roll on this table.

# 46.

A bottle of Jolt Cola is found on the ground. Although 300+ years old, it is still fizzy and the bottle sealed. Labeling on the body is slightly faded but in good condition.

Anyone opening the bottle lets out a violent arc of lightning. Everyone within 60 feet take 6d6 md, everyone from 61 feet to 80 feet take 2d6 md.

Anyone who survives has a bonus of + 4 to initiative, + 2 to dodge/auto dodge/parry/auto parry, and a +6 to perception checks. They also have a cola taste in their mouths. All bonuses last for 24 hours.

If anyone drinks the cola after the lighting strikes, they'll receive an additional bonus of + 2d6 to both PP and SPD. This also lasts 24 hours. They'll also find that the cola is chilled. Only the first person drinking from the bottle gains the benefits to attributes.

If a Shocker survives the lightning &/or drinks from the bottle, he gains double the effects.

#47 Base ball cap that says "Russ lives"

#48 A dirty and dingy shoebox that contains the entire internet up to the day the Rifts came. Of course, if you open it, you have to roll a 16+ on initiative to close it quickly enough or else you lose the internet, which will, after some time, become mutated by the Rifts and the magic, and will become an unstopable monster that has all the information and power of the internet at it's disposal. Soon you will see people curse by this thing to have magical billboards appear over their heads whenever you speak to them. And so on.

49 An advertisement for cheap Canadian prescription drugs

50 a gallon of compressor oil.SAE 30W

51 - A human eyeball preserved in a jar of formaldehyde.

52, your standard, run of the mill capuchin monkey with 6,500 MDC.
53 an airwolf arm patch.
54 let us not for get a box of hammers.

55 Ornate dagger and 4 crestal and pewter goblets.
G.Ms have fun with this one

56 A magical little toy that has a bear on a unicycle smoking a cigarette and juggling balls. It will do this indefinitely. CURSED Will cause the owner to giggle continuously.

57 Working P.K.E. meter from ghost busters.
In game mashers P.P.E. and I.S.P.

#58.

A bath sponge. No matter where it's found, it's always wet. Can be sucked on to provide .5 days of water to a single human a day. But if sucked on, it tastes like soap, but at least it will help you stay alive just a little longer...

#59 Box of rocks all blue 12 total that
grant breath with out air lev 3
You must first swallow said rock

#60 Ancient torture device. Nose hair tweezers.

# 61 deck of nude female (jokers are males) playing cards in original wrapper.

#62 A box of rocks found with #59. This one will inevitabley be opened after the contents of the other box are tested.

If the players consume these they will 'increase' their I.Q. to that of a box of rocks... yeah there stupid now.

63: An odd E-Clip with a stylized, two-headed eagle on it. Fits North American laser weapons, has the same capacity as a standard E-clip, but recharges to full power within a few hours of being exposed to some manner of an ambient energy source. If thrown in a fire, it will recharge to full capacity in about thirty minutes.

64: A box of Bavarian Wild Berry tea - edible condition

65: a super soaker - can hold half a gallon of water.

66: An Aperture Science Laboratories Portable Portal Device - operating like a gun, the user can create two connected portals on any large, flat, and solid surface. Momentum is preserved during transit - in laymans terms, fast things go in, fast things go out. On it include these warnings: Do not look directly at the opertional end of the device; Do not touch the operational end of the device; Do not submerge the device in liquid.

67: You've found the Third Nipple of Vecna!

68: A picture in an MDC picture frame of a bald man with a heavy stubble and a paternal, joyful smile, who is holding a paper bag with a baby in it sucking on a pacifier. Behind the child is a caged parakeet.

69 (dude!)

A severed head is found on the ground. When the party walk around to the front, it speaks to them. It tells them it is a genie, and if reunited with it's body, it will grant 3 wishes.

If it really belongs to a genie, or some form of devil, is up to the GM. Same with the wishes.

70. A pair of Rose Colored Glasses. If you don't know the story of these glasses, the wearer sees everything as "Rosey". All is fine, no danger, everything is peaceful, humorous, etc.

71 - A DVD boxset collection of some random anime, complete with little mascot toy attached to the side.

72. A glass slipper.

73: a working copy of Metalocalypse(sp?) special edition.

74: A glowing golden key that is labeled as "Key to ultimate power, wealth, immortality, and all you desire. The locker number is..." Unfortunately the part with the locker number has been torn off. Also, you have no idea WHERE the locker is as well...

75

A block and tackle. Can be used to lift engines out of a car, and the usual heavy lifting one uses a block & tackle for.

Also, gives a %10 bonus on seduction roles.

76 A crystal set radio playing some music that seems to use fast paced music with a lot of instruments. (Big band swing music)

#77 An HD-DVD player/recorder still in the box... unfortunately you can't find any disks to play in it.

79 Find your pants in somone elses hands... oh and they're the ones you were wearing.

80 Complete kit for tying fishing flies.

81 Secret contract between several makers of a pre-rifts musical style called " techno", and several companies who manufacture the medications acetaminophen and/or Ibuprofen.

82 Tombstone that reads :

Hear lies king Arr'thuu, good riddance.

83

You encounter a group of trappers who say: " What would you do for a few gecko pelts? I've been in this woods a long time, if you know what I mean."

84 A complete package of material promoting some kind of pyramid scheme or ponzi scheme. Characters with an IQ of 12 or less must roll to save vs their IQ score not to get sucked right in.
78 You find someone elses hair stuck in your significant others zipper!

85 A black cat rubs against your leg and has taken a liking to you. She is now following you.

#86 A black large dog has taken a liking to you. He is now following you.

87.

A kit car, like the Stirling (US variant of my Eureka, see link in sig), which is complete!

Well, you still need the donor car though...

Doh!

88

A 1970 VW Beetle. Complete, in fair condition. The body can be removed and the kit from #87 fitted in it's place.

89 A Lambo diablo with everthing except motor and one door.

#90 A Lambo door too bad even lambos don't use lambo doors

91

A Cursed Rune Circlet, powered by the soul of an Abberration who is really, really hoping to make a new friend. Once placed on the head, it affixes itself there permanently, cursing the owner with listening to the complaining and whining until the end of his days. Provides a bonus of +30% save vs coma and death, +4 roll with impact, and will instantly heal it's owner of 4d6+12 HP or MDC if they ever drop to zero or below, usable up to 4 times per day, and can regenerate necessary organs, but not limbs. Makes the owners head completely indestructible, just like the circlet...
Roll for a random insanity every 6 months, 45% chance.

The circlet is found on a partial skeleton with a perfectly preserved head. The skeletons hands are holding onto the sides of the head, and the face has a permanent look of horror. It has tattoo on it's forehead that says: "GM's revenge" Close by is a 10-15 foot crater, about 20 feet deep. Roll on demolitions skill to recognize that it was made by the simultaneous detonation of several fusion blocks

92 : A black bottle marked with "XXX" on it. Filled with some liquid substance.

93: The "liquid substance" from number 92 tearing through the countryside looking desperately for someone to drink it.

94) Big freakin hand gun SDC/MDC optional with engraved wording "Big Momma"

95) the complete musical collection of Judy Garland and Micky Rooney in perfect condition :O

96:

Can of purple paint. It has enough paint to paint one small vehicle or PA suit, or 5 body suits. When the item is finished in it's new purple colour scheme, the painters skin will turn purple. Duration of the colour change is upto the GM

97 Two big automatic pistols apparently they are "Cutlass" brand pistols... even though there is no one around, you dread the idea of touching one as an image of Lucifer's daughter coming to get her pistols back and giving you a very messy death keeps popping into your head.

98 An automatic pistol which is apparently of the "DAGGER" brand. When you hold it, it feels... happy?

99.A rubics cube that looks like waldo

00 Rubix Ultra - 6 sides with 6x6 squares in each side, sides can change color at random for added challenge. The ultimate challenge in 2095, all the rage with novelty guys even today. The right buyer would pay 10,000 credits for this rare prerifts artifact (including one Joseph Prosek II).

#64: Shady Slug's hands in a jar.

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Sun Mar 01, 2009 5:39 am

Rockwolfmandude, that's cool for compiling those lists. You...rock.

8]

Hystrix · Unread post by **Hystrix** » Sat May 23, 2009 9:29 am

68. A 12-sided die. Upon finding it, the character angrigly tosses it, but it ricochets back and hits the PC for...*gasp* 1D12 damage (SDC or MDC it dosn't matter, either way it's annoying)! Fickin' 12-siders!

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Sun May 24, 2009 1:59 pm

70.A working McDonald's kitchen!
71.A live alligator handbag!

Ziggurat the Eternal · Mon Jun 15, 2009 1:02 am

72 an interior crocodile alligator!

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Tue Jun 16, 2009 6:34 pm

73.the teapot samuri!

Ziggurat the Eternal · Wed Jun 17, 2009 8:30 pm

74. A clockwork orange.

Ziggurat the Eternal · Fri Jun 19, 2009 8:37 pm

75. A Transformers Beast Wars collectable

Rockwolf66 · Unread post by **Rockwolf66** » Sat Jul 18, 2009 1:41 am

Unfortunantly I have lost my lists of random Items and I had about twenty of them all told. It's rather anoying as I had customised mine and had stats for all the good stuff.

Ziggurat the Eternal · Sun Jul 19, 2009 12:49 am

Rockwolf66 wrote:Unfortunantly I have lost my lists of random Items and I had about twenty of them all told. It's rather anoying as I had customised mine and had stats for all the good stuff.

That sucks hard.....

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Fri Sep 25, 2009 10:04 am

#83.

A chia cat. When grass seeds are placed on it and watered, it will animate. For the person who keeps it watered and 'trimmed' it will sleep beside that person and gently snore. For that one person, they'll always have a good nights sleep.

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Fri Sep 25, 2009 2:40 pm

#84.a chia fudd-like the chia cat except that it will also protect the user from evil rabbits!

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Sat Sep 26, 2009 10:46 am

abe wrote:#84.a chia fudd-like the chia cat except that it will also protect the user from evil rabbits!

Awesome!! I love it. 8]

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Sat Sep 26, 2009 10:49 am

#85.

A d13. Yes, a 13 sided dice. When picked up, it looks something like a d12. But when you check the faces, you'll find there's 1 through 13 on the dice. It works as a normal dice for those who use it, but if you try to comprehend it's non euclidean shape, you'll have a roll on the insanity table.

Jefffar · Unread post by **Jefffar** » Sat Sep 26, 2009 2:35 pm

abe wrote:#84.a chia fudd-like the chia cat except that it will also protect the user from evil rabbits!

and is vewy-vewy kwai-et.

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Sun Oct 04, 2009 9:19 am

#86

A large wrapped gift. The gift is some 11 feet tall, and wrapped up in rune paper. Tied together with rune ribbons and tied off in a rune bow, this large object is found sitting on the ground.

One the rune ribbon is found a card, the inscription reads;

From Russia with love.

One could say that the gift is somewhat 'borgish' in shape, but who knows what temperament the 'gift' will be when it's unwrapped.

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Sun Nov 22, 2009 5:22 pm

a samuri rabbit!see the teenage mutant ninja turtle cartoon(the first series)

Kagashi · Unread post by **Kagashi** » Sun Dec 13, 2009 10:48 am

#89 Golden Age reproduction (2069 AD) of 1862 Hardee's Rifle and Light Infantry Tactics

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Mon Dec 14, 2009 7:08 pm

#90-a bunch of pre-rifts cookbooks!
#91-a bunch of pre-rifts blueprints!

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:39 pm

abe wrote:a samuri rabbit!see the teenage mutant ninja turtle cartoon(the first series)

The Rabbit's name is Yo Sagi Yo Jimbo and was originally from the comics and has a comic series of his own.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:43 pm

CoalitionMerc wrote:88# a Boom gun converted into a planter (completely unfixable) that currently has 1d12 roses 1d12 alien flowers and 1 Sapling growing in it

Should have been or 1d6x10 terran flowers, 1d6x10 alien flowers, and 1d6x10 something or others. That way the Boom gun still does 3d6x10

Jefffar · Unread post by **Jefffar** » Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:04 pm

Wouldn't that be a Bloom Gun?

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 9:42 am

#93 A fully functional Ford Model T car made in 1909.

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 9:47 am

#94 Body of a Predator with massive acidic head wound.

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 9:52 am

#95 Body of an Alien (like in the AvP movies) with massive blast wounds and cuts. Evidence of acidic burns aronund body.

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 9:57 am

#96 A cd entitled "Black Eyed Peas Greatest Hits".

bigbobsr6000 · Sat Dec 19, 2009 10:02 am

#97 A 1 foot cube box pleasently wraped......and.........ticking.

bigbobsr6000 · Sat Dec 19, 2009 10:05 am

#98 A 1 foot cube box pleasently wraped. If opened roll again on any random item table to see what it is. Regardless of size item it appears and box disappears permentantly.

bigbobsr6000 · Sat Dec 19, 2009 10:08 am

#99 An English to German language book printed 1999.

bigbobsr6000 · Sat Dec 19, 2009 10:10 am

#00 Complete set of gaming dice and dice bag.

Danger · Unread post by **Danger** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 11:01 am

#68

A pair of vintage sneakers. Gives a +10% to prowl in an urban enviroment.

Danger · Unread post by **Danger** » Sat Dec 19, 2009 11:02 am

CyCo wrote:#86

A large wrapped gift. The gift is some 11 feet tall, and wrapped up in rune paper. Tied together with rune ribbons and tied off in a rune bow, this large object is found sitting on the ground.

One the rune ribbon is found a card, the inscription reads;

From Russia with love.

One could say that the gift is somewhat 'borgish' in shape, but who knows what temperament the 'gift' will be when it's unwrapped.

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Mon Dec 21, 2009 7:54 pm

#01-a monkey-bird!
#02-a bird-monkey!

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Tue Dec 22, 2009 5:51 am

# 03

Fake monkey poo.

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Tue Dec 22, 2009 9:57 am

#4 A poo flining monkey.

Jefffar · Unread post by **Jefffar** » Tue Dec 22, 2009 11:32 pm

#5 A monkey flinging fake poo
#6 a fake monkey flinging poo
#7 a fake monkey flinging fake poo

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:54 am

# 8

A Zombie Monkey Clown flinging rotting entrails.

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Wed Dec 23, 2009 1:10 pm

#9 A giant animated mound of poo flinging monkeys.

Rockwolf66 · Unread post by **Rockwolf66** » Wed Dec 23, 2009 11:50 pm

Could I get the complete random item tables from someone please?

10.) A large set of Revolvers themed after a deck of cards. You have four suits (Diamonds, Clubs, Swords, and hearts) with a set of revolvers patterned after it's suit( Swords are all gunblades and clubs are made to pistol whip people for example). The kings are all chambered in .500 S&W, Queens are chambered in .454 Casull, Jacks are chambered in .44 Remingtom Magnum and the number cards are all chambered in .357 magnum.

There is a Joker in the deck and it is a 40mm Grenade launcher.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Sun Dec 27, 2009 2:26 am

11. A pair of revolvers with stylized monkey emblems on the grips (.45 mag)

12. A pair of revolvers with stylized poo throwing monkey emblems on the grips (.45 poo)

Good luck with that rockwolf66 I thought I was bad asking for doing the individual lists.

Just go and copy and paste them. Every so often through the thread someone has compiled them.

13. A fully auto pistol that has an odd button on the barrel that makes hardened prongs pop out near the clip port. It is like it is a weapon for some sort of gun toting monk. Gun-do, Gun-ryu, Gun-something.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Sun Dec 27, 2009 2:30 am

Jefffar wrote:Wouldn't that be a Bloom Gun?

ROFLCOPTER that is funny and when it goes off you can't smell for (however long the boom gun makes you deaf) :lol:

abe · Unread post by **abe** » Sun Dec 27, 2009 8:55 pm

13.a chia golem!
14.chia hair!plant it on your bald scalp & in 2-4 months you will have a loushos lock of green hair!

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Tue Mar 16, 2010 9:06 am

This thread, it needs saving from going too far back into the depths of the board, and thus obliteration.

Thus;

#15,

A shiny new hubcap from a 1958 Volkswagon 'Combi' van with the 'split' front windows. If worn on the head, will offer a +5 on saving throws vs magic & psionic mind control. But the wearer will also have a (5%) chance of attracting 1d4 long haired hippies a day for 1d4 days. These hippies will follow the wearer of the hubcap like a lost puppy. These hippies are vulnerable, and if killed, the wearer will find he's lost the hubcap somewhere. The hippies will also make a camp fire and sing 'hippie music' whenever the party stop for longer than 10 minutes.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Thu Mar 18, 2010 11:16 pm

21 Has been done already owl

I think 18 has been done too.

Thats cool though because after thinking about it, it just makes those items more common.

#23 A box of TP after going through half the box do you realize... it's already used :puke:

#24 Finger sandwiches (yes they are fingers but that is toe jam, who would eat th... roll initiative)

#25 One case of vortex grenades (40K reference, don't throw unless you want some things to go away... maybe even you)

#26 The number 42... now you have your answer go away.

#27 A wedgie board (yes I spelled it the way I want it instead of ouija) it has the instructions for a ouija board but when asked any questions its answer is always an atomic wedgie, pray to your deities that you have some underwear on. :eek:

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Sun Mar 28, 2010 10:10 am

#28

A bottle of Coke, full of urine. Found on the side of the road.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Mon Mar 29, 2010 3:35 am

CyCo wrote:#28

A bottle of Coke, full of urine. Found on the side of the road.

and the rogue scientist or other PC that would have Lore: Golden Age or Lore: 19xx-20xx tries to figure out first why anyone would snort this urine smelling stuff and then how the hell they cut it with a razor.

bigbobsr6000 · Unread post by **bigbobsr6000** » Mon Mar 29, 2010 7:55 am

#29 A package of Hot Wheels cars.