Stupid player tricks

[Captain Shiva]

What's the dumbest thing you've ever had a player do or say in one of your games? Something that displayed an utter shortage of gaming knowledge, clues, and common sense? My favorite was a player who had a VX 2020 cyborg, the one they called the Monster. This one had been tricked out: it had 20 minimissile launchers, a 40 round built in grenade launcher, chest ion blasters, FIWS on two of its four arms, and he carried two particle beam pistols, a pair of Dragonfire laser rifles, and a railgun. So what does this guy use against an IAR-3 Skull Smasher? A C-18 LASER PISTOL, thats what. 2d4 MD vs a 990 MD vehicle. According to my calculations, he would need 62 maximum damage critical hits to destroy this thing.

[Northern Ranger]

A buddy of mine played an Orc once, (actually a High Orc, but he was under a spell that prevented him remembering this), and this orc was kind of... well... dense. One of his favorite past times was fishing. How did he fish? By throwing boulders into streams and prying the fish out from beneath them. He had to catch about a hundred fish before he had enough left over for a meal!

[Dog_O_War]

I had a super-custom suit of exo-skeletal cyborg armour (was a partial conversion borg), wielding a C-29, flying around on a Jetpack.

Forgot to mention that the pack was bolted and not strapped on. I then perceeded to get hit with an area fireball that delt enough to have the straps burned off while 200ft in the air.

Good times.

[LostOne]

Had a SDC human who refused to wear a helmet on his otherwise environmental bodyarmor because he was "too pretty." He described the character as having long wavy hair, very Fabio or something.

He was killed by a trap the first night that the GM had planned out in advance before the first night of the game. Their quarry was a spec-op CS soldier, and he had a little time to prepare for their coming. There was a trap aimed specifically at head height (two logs coming down and crushing the head). GM said it might have knocked someone in an MDC helmet out and probably given them a concussion, but this guy, you couldn't have identified him if all you had to check against was dental records.

Had an unaugmented level 1 player start a bar-fight against a juicer...

We were crawling through some tunnels to a fuel factory, the GM had previously described the tunnel as smelling like gasoline. Twenty minutes later we get into a fight, the players all remember to go hand-to-hand rather than using their energy weapons and risk starting an explosion. But when one of the enemies tore off the Bursters night-vision helmet, the burster turned on flame so he could see...everyone not in environmental body armor either died in the SDC fire explosion, or like the burster, suffocated from lack of oxygen.

We were being held prisoner by a group of vampires who were transporting us to a prison they used as a cafeteria. One of the players got into a verbal argument with one of the vampires and used the words "eat me".

[LostOne]

I had a player try to start a "Gargoyle Appreciation Day" in the NGR. It was the 4th continent he was exiled from.

I request how he was exiled from the other continents as well.

[Natasha]

Had a SDC human who refused to wear a helmet on his otherwise environmental bodyarmor because he was "too pretty." He described the character as having long wavy hair, very Fabio or something.

He was killed by a trap the first night that the GM had planned out in advance before the first night of the game. Their quarry was a spec-op CS soldier, and he had a little time to prepare for their coming. There was a trap aimed specifically at head height (two logs coming down and crushing the head). GM said it might have knocked someone in an MDC helmet out and probably given them a concussion, but this guy, you couldn't have identified him if all you had to check against was dental records.

Had an unaugmented level 1 player start a bar-fight against a juicer...

We were crawling through some tunnels to a fuel factory, the GM had previously described the tunnel as smelling like gasoline. Twenty minutes later we get into a fight, the players all remember to go hand-to-hand rather than using their energy weapons and risk starting an explosion. But when one of the enemies tore off the Bursters night-vision helmet, the burster turned on flame so he could see...everyone not in environmental body armor either died in the SDC fire explosion, or like the burster, suffocated from lack of oxygen.

We were being held prisoner by a group of vampires who were transporting us to a prison they used as a cafeteria. One of the players got into a verbal argument with one of the vampires and used the words "eat me".

Stupid? Sure.

But what style!

[LostOne]

Stupid? Sure.

But what style!

I have nothing against style, but if it gets you quickly dead, it's still a bad idea.

[Natasha]

Stupid? Sure.

But what style!

I have nothing against style, but if it gets you quickly dead, it's still a bad idea.

Sure, sure. Of course.

[Dog_O_War]

Style don't mean jack in combat! ONLY if you're doin' it with a recording!

Stupid is not the word for it! Total lack of Respect is!

Seriously, well semi-seriously, the level of danger and POTENTIAL for death within the Rifts megaverse has the risk factor enhanced to a degree the average human mind is unable to comprehend.

So I am figuring that lots of character death is guarenteed.

Bah, that's all heresy.

We used to go helmet-less in Deadlands: the Wasted West all the time. And that game is atleast twice as deadly. 'Course, being poor and not capable of affording a helmet had alot to do with it (well for most people), but that's besides the point.

Hell, look at the characters for the Rifts comic Ramone Perez drew. There was like what, one helmet between the 5-6 people that actually needed one?

[Dog_O_War]

Hmm. We need to make suits in Rifts, the helmets to be made of the same material from which the cockpits of Coalition aircraft are built. Just make them perfectly globe-shaped, like a '50s spaceman.
Could even call it Spaceman Armor.
The reason? Helmets are underused in visual media because helmets obscure distinguishing features. While you could just customize the helmets (as per Heinlein's Red Planet), this still would reduce the drama by making facial expressions unavailable.

Thats a brilliant idea! I can see it now, replace all those new west body armors' helmets with big MDC glass globes. The lucky cowboys can even keep their hats on inside the glass (comically squished against the sides of course).

A revolutionary painted cover by Johnny Z and it will become the next fad in pen and paper games. Every one will run out to by a copy of the game that enables your character to show case the seriousness of his expression whilst avoiding the loss of oh-so-important cranial protection.

That's assuming the glass is anti-glare. Nothin' worse than pulling of thee Clint Eastwood gaze, only to be thwarted by that damned sun reflection.

Also, I think the name Mysterio would become a common moniker for many a PC.

[Cinos]

Group was laying low in the Chi-Town 'burbs, and as a squad of soldiers (who where later shown to be off duty, including a dog boy), the psionic of the group started a fight with them.
In another, the party had been gifted with a visit to on of Thoth's homes, one player attempted to steal from this (a rather large Diamond). Thankfully, the mage of the party noticed, using Domintion spell and order the player to "Place your fingers in your nose until told otherwise", and so the player was forced to sit and have a chat with Thoth that way.

[Spectre]

Had two PC's in a palladium Fantasy game, A mutant rabbit blacksmith and a trickster mage, running with a Gnome Priest of light and an Elven Fire warlock across a city wall. On the right side, houses about 40 feet down; on the left side, a river about 150 down. The players a are escaping from a district where they had started trouble. The trickster mage spotted a roaming guard and decided he wanted to tackle him. Anyhoo, long story short him and the gaurd start to tumble off the wall into the water side. The group manages to grab and save him. Not to be hindered, they spot two more gaurds coming at them. The bunny and the mage try the SAME THING. This time the brilliance has spread. They proceed to go flying off the wall, water side. The only thing that saved them was the Gnome's quick prayer of intervention.

[LostOne]

I have one player that firmly believe every thing is base on attributes he is so trapped by this idea that every character is a carbon copy of each other with almost every physical skill. He does fine in combat as that is all he is skilled in. The problem is that my games require that people use their skills. It makes up a great deal in my game as I believe that there are so skills that an adventuring party needs. He however, has kill himself and many other tiring to perform skills that he does not have. A prime example of this was using a fusion block in battle with no skill, killed three. I have talk to him again and again about it but he always does the same things. I would clip him but three other player are family with him and it his place that we usually game.

Run a game where you have pre-generated all the characters, they can only pick from the ones you made for this game. Pick low-power ones like rogue scholars, rogue scientists, vagabond (without the superpower option from the conversion book), a gimped (poor physical stats) cyber-knight, a glitterboy pilot whose GB was destroyed and can't afford a new one, etc.

[Lenwen]

it's a little weird that he goes from crazy anarchist scholar to beacon of knightly justice within a session)

I disagree ... I think that is role playing at its finest ..
Yeah sure one was a homicidal maniac ... an the other a beacon of knightly justice .. just shows you this guy knows how to role play

[LostOne]

I disagree ... I think that is role playing at its finest ..
Yeah sure one was a homicidal maniac ... an the other a beacon of knightly justice .. just shows you this guy knows how to role play

But it sounds like he only plays the homicidal maniac unless forced to play something else. There's no variety there.

[kirksmithicus]

I had a new guy who was playing a juicer in my game and the first time the group gets into comabat I ask him to parry an attack. He tells me his character is a juicer and that means he automatically dodges and parries everything. Well as you can imagine the game came to a screeching halt. I DON'T THINK SO!, was my answer. He told me that was what it said in the book and that in his old group he had played a juicer for years using that rule. I made him re-read the juicer portion of the main book and then explained that automatic parry and dodge meant his character had a chance to parry and dodge all attacks against him, not that he couldn't be hit by an attack. Guess who's juicer got smacked upside the head for the first time ever.

If I recall correctly I believe the Juicers name was M.C. Hammer

[LostOne]

I had a juicer argue that because of his autododge he gets a roll against all attacks...including megaton nuclear explosions (the kind that have blast radius of miles)...yeah, he ended up being extra crispy, the Colonel would be proud.

He tells me his character is a juicer and that means he automatically dodges and parries everything.

Wow...it's the munchkin's holy grail!

He told me that was what it said in the book and that in his old group he had played a juicer for years using that rule.

I call BS...someone at some point in those years would have happened to come across the rules for autoparry and autododge in the combat section...

[livewire]

I had a juicer argue that because of his autododge he gets a roll against all attacks...including megaton nuclear explosions (the kind that have blast radius of miles)...yeah, he ended up being extra crispy, the Colonel would be proud.

He tells me his character is a juicer and that means he automatically dodges and parries everything.

Wow...it's the munchkin's holy grail!

He told me that was what it said in the book and that in his old group he had played a juicer for years using that rule.

I call BS...someone at some point in those years would have happened to come across the rules for autoparry and autododge in the combat section...

i had a similar situation a guy once try to convince me that since his juicer has a chance to autododge everything that when falling he should have a chance to dodge the ground. while not allowing this is started a funny comment that survives to this day that if a juicer can dodge the ground can he fly? kinda like the cat with the buttered bread attached to its back and then dropped

[Dog_O_War]

On my first ever GMing session one of my PCs, a elf ranger named Legolas decided to throw a book at the giant dragon's nose that they just woke up and threatened. Needless to say he was turned crispy in the following fire. Elf bits, my favorite snack.

I think the copy-right police should've apprehended him before he even made it to the dragon's lair. And if not that, then the cliche mob shoulda rolled up and gunned him down on the spot.

[BillionSix]

I may have told this story before...

We were playing Rifts. One guy was playing a Glitter Boy. We were deep in the woods hiding under the trees while SAMAS armors flew overhead looking for us. They knew we were there, but couldn't see us under the trees.
We couldn't see them very clearly, though, only hear their general direction from the sound of their engines.
The Glitter Boy comes up with a Cunning Plan™. "Okay, I can't fly, but I have these retro-thruster things, right? Can I reposition them to allow me to fly?"
The GM says, "No. That's not what they were meant for. They're for stabilization for when you fire your Boom Gun."
"Yeah, yeah. I know that. I don't need to fly well or far. I just want to hover above the treeline so I can to recon and see where the SAMAS are."
"Um... okay."

Now I know there are a million logical and techinal reasons why that wouldn't work. But the GM seemed to want to reward clever thinking. So he approved it.

"Okay, you are now hovering in a very unstable way above the treeline. You see a SAMAS."
"I FIRE MY BOOM GUN AT HIM!!!!"

This led to a long argument as to whether the idiot should survive at all. It was agreed that he missed, and was send careening head over heels to crash land far away.
The GM was generous. The Glitter Boy was still functional, but had lost half its armor.
We then sat and explained in depth about how the Boom Gun will do that unless you have pylons drilled into the earth and retro thrusters stabilizing you.
The player was very embarrassed and apologetic about this.

So he says, "Well, the original plan was still good, right? I'll do it again. I'll hover above the trees and report their position."
"Um, okay. You manage to go above the trees. You see a SAMAS coming in your general direction."
"I FIRE MY BOOM GUN AT HIM!!!"

He didn't survive this time.

Brian

[Captain Shiva]

Best one so far.

[J. Lionheart]

Well, since this thread is completely ressurected here...


Many years ago, we had a not-so-bright player, running as a hob-goblin. The party was moving through the jungle, looking for the entrance to a tomb. After getting a tip, we located a deep dark hole in the ground.

Player: "I hold a torch down as far as I can, and look for the ground."
GM: "The light flickers off the pit's walls, but you can't see the bottom."
Player: "I drop a pebble in and listen for it to hit."
GM: "You listen hard, but don't hear any kind of impact."
Player: "Fine, I jump in"

[Specter]

Characters come into a room full of crates. Instead of trying to open the crates they start smashing them, and shooting them. Then they ask what's inside the crates.

Me: mostly broken things now....
Them: Why are they broken?
Me: What did you expect to happen when you shot that crate with a shotgun?
Them: Get the item inside?

[Captain Shiva]

While running a Rifts/Robotech combo game back in the early 90's, one of our players decided to take in a Glitter Boy. I'd been a nice guy GM, and allowed everyone to roll 2D4 to get their level, and he rolled a lucky 7.

So, thinking he was just the luckiest guy EVER, since he was the highest level in our party, AND a GB, he walked right up to an Invid Red Enforcer. Said he wanted to try to "make friends with it." So, of course, he stepped out of his armor, first. SPLAT!

Suffice it to say, I will never again play a RT/Rifts cross-over with folk who have never read the game books and/or seen the series again. Took two weeks to get him to quit pouting long enough to roll up a new character.

I would have made friends with it,too. "SAY HELLO TO MY BIG SHINY FRIEND!!"

[jedi078]

In my games player stupidity usually results in character death. Granted nat 1’s and Nat 20’s play their part….

[Mallak's Place]

We had one of our regular players girlfriends in the game once, she had never played a RPG before, she was playing a Mind Melter. We were deep in a Vampire layer fighting hard and fast (stake and run) to get to the bottem to save a bunch of children the vampires had kidnaped. She is always bringing up the rear but in every new enounter with the vampires she is telekinticly flinging stakes at them like there is no tomarrow. Finaly one of us asks her where she is getting all the stakes she is flinging, and what does she say "Oh, I'm pulling them out of the vampires we already killed."

[LostOne]

We had one of our regular players girlfriends in the game once, she had never played a RPG before, she was playing a Mind Melter. We were deep in a Vampire layer fighting hard and fast (stake and run) to get to the bottem to save a bunch of children the vampires had kidnaped. She is always bringing up the rear but in every new enounter with the vampires she is telekinticly flinging stakes at them like there is no tomarrow. Finaly one of us asks her where she is getting all the stakes she is flinging, and what does she say "Oh, I'm pulling them out of the vampires we already killed."

Unless the GM or other players have informed her that the vampires start moving again once a stake is removed, it's a good idea. I'd never heard of vampires as hard to kill as Rifts vampires until I started playing Rifts. She's probably seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer or some other where they die when staked no need to do all the extra steps you have to do in Rifts. It's the GM's or other player's fault for not informing her of something her character would know previously or at least be seeing the first time she removes a stake.

[Captain Shiva]

We had one of our regular players girlfriends in the game once, she had never played a RPG before, she was playing a Mind Melter. We were deep in a Vampire layer fighting hard and fast (stake and run) to get to the bottem to save a bunch of children the vampires had kidnaped. She is always bringing up the rear but in every new enounter with the vampires she is telekinticly flinging stakes at them like there is no tomarrow. Finaly one of us asks her where she is getting all the stakes she is flinging, and what does she say "Oh, I'm pulling them out of the vampires we already killed."

Which would explain the seemingly endless supply of vampires.

[Razzinold]

A group my friend played with before in university was in a campaign where they were hunting vamps. The GM told them that they were pretty sure that they were followed back to their hotel. Well long story short they are in their room when there is a knock at the door and before anyone else can say or do anything one guy shouts out "the door is open, come on in!" ofcourse it was a vamp, they were told that they were followed.

In our game of Chaos Earth we were fighting a Subjugator with laser weapons, one pc decides to engage in close combat fighting. Her clip ran out so she used it like a club and the GM told her that it shattered on the demon and did not effect it much. So she (being an SDC creature) decides to punch the demon instead. Some people just can't grasp the concept of SDC vs MDC.

One game we were playing freedom fighters from Skraypers, none of us had armour on and we were standing in a circle fighting (because we were outnumbered and surrounded by the enemy) so the one guy decides to use his one of his electricity powers (we were all mutants with one major and one minor power) instead of firing a bolt at one enemy he decides to attack them all and uses (forget the name) an attack that basicaly releases massive amounts of energy out away from him in a circular pattern. ofcourse I try to warn him but the GM cuts me off saying my PC doesn't know what he is about to do, then the GM tries to warn him by showing him the diagram again of the fight: which is the dots in a triangle shape (our 3 pc's) with a ring of bad guys around us. So he does not listen, lets loose with the blast (he is immune to it) I roll up a new PC since the electricity coursed through my body and my head exploded and the GM needed a new NPC for our team. It was our first battle with the PCS and I had an awesome PC that I didn't even get to use. I was pissed I don't know why someone who does not understand the laws of electricity wanted to play someone with those powers so badly. I was tempted to kill his PC with my new one, but that would have been wrong of me. But since my new PC knew the details of the other teammate my new PC refused to work side by side with him and he wore a suit that insulated him from electricity.

[ZorValachan]

Plane was going down. Everyone had parachutes except 2 characters. They each held one end of the 'chute and were basically trying to wrestle it away from each other.
Everyone else looks at one of the players, "What game are you playing?"
Player looks confused.
"Your character has wings"
He was playing an 8 or 9 foot tall techno-demon with wings.

Later, the party goes into a bar. Same players, "I move to the corner and try to stay inconspicuous"
Everybody else, "What game are you playing?"-again 8-9 foot tall demon with wings...

For a few years it became our groups favourite phrase.

[9voltkilowatt]

Years back in a Palladiium Fantasy game one of the players announced that his centaur assassin (yeah, marvel at how stupid that is!) was going to scale the castle wall...

when asked how, he simply said "with my grapnel and rope, what else?"

oh, and almost forgot to mention that the centaur "assassin" used a voulge as his weapon of choice.

[Captain Shiva]

Years back in a Palladiium Fantasy game one of the players announced that his centaur assassin (yeah, marvel at how stupid that is!) was going to scale the castle wall...

when asked how, he simply said "with my grapnel and rope, what else?"

oh, and almost forgot to mention that the centaur "assassin" used a voulge as his weapon of choice.

One question:did the GM actually let him get away with it?

[Lord Z]

I don't see a problem with a Centaur being an assassin. He would just use different techniques than the stereotypical ninja-clone concept for an assassin. The original Cult of Assassins didn't use invisibility and backstabbing as much as trickery and drugs or poisons. Erik Wujick's Weapons and Assassins explains it all in detail. The scaling of the wall was probably just a brain fart which involved the player forgetting that his character was a assassin. The funny part was when he was allowed to try it -- I'm hoping that is how it went down.

[Nomadic]

Ok the setup.

CS Grunt was caught and being questioned as a DB lover.

He was in a chair with his hands zipped tied behind his back to the door with Two CS Commando Guards. Inside the room Guarding him while he was being questioned.

Player: "Ok this is what I'm going to do.. I'm going to flip kick the chair back to the door and hit one of the guards and propel myself over the guy questiong me and grab his sidearm and use him as a body shield. Since the guards aren't wearing helms I'll do called shots and doge (Using partial cover rules) to thier heads."

What do I need to role? "Sence of balance?", "Backflip"? "Graple"?

GM: (ME) Do you have BullShiTzu?

[Khanibal]

Fantasy
Paladin is flying around on his bonded hippogryph. The rest of the party is on a ship. A suchi...shucka... a giant prehistoric crocagator thing attacks the ship. Paladin charges the monster. Paladin crits the monster with his lance. Paladin had previously stated that he had tethered the lance to himself, "So I don't drop it in the water, while flying." Crocagator acts as fulcrum. Lance acts as lever. Hippogryph checks contract and is dismayed that he can only abandon paladin for acts contrary to alignment or deity, not for gross stupidity. Party laughs.

Party approaches bridge. Group of heavily armored men approaches from opposite side. Party moves aside, except for ONE character. PC stands in the middle of the bridge and demands to know who the men are.
NPC: "We are paladins of the holy order. Who are you?"
PC: "I am Torald the thief."
Party: "We don't know him." "Thief! I wonder if he's stolen anything from me." "I thought there was something fishy about that guy."

Super-Hero
Speedster runs up alongside a bus filled with terrorists, while flying guy tries to land on top so he can peel the roof off.
Speedy: "I look into the window."
GM: [rolls dice] "You see about 20 terrorists. One of them notices you and starts to raise a rocket-launcher."
Speedy: "I shoot the rocket-launcher with my energy blast."
GM: "You shoot the guy with the rocket-launcher?"
Speedy: "No, I shoot the rocket-launcher."
GM: [pauses a minute, gets out calculator, rolls dice] "Okay, it explodes. You [flying guy] die. You [speedy] are one point from death. The terrorists all die. Half a dozen carloads of people near the bus on the freeway die, and another dozen or so are seriously injured in the resulting pile-up."

Team is trying to infiltrate super-villian base to steal data on mutants. Marvel super-hero game, so mutie pc's not on speaking terms with authorities. Said authorities have also surrounded the base. Team manages to sneak in thanks to one character's darkness powers. Team encircles base. Power-suit guy activates his communicator.
"I'm in position and maintaining radio silence."

Team is trying to infilitrate military base. PC's take up positions around the base. Diminutive strong-guy activates communicator.
"I'm in position and maintaining radio silence."
Different games, different character, same player.

Character on team Named Gold Eagle [Cap. A. type] constantly refers to another pc (Blackjack) as his sidekick, and never gets his name right (Black Ace, Blackman, Black Heart, et c.). Team in serious fight.
Gold Eagle: "Blackjack (first time used correct name), throw the red lever!"
Blackjack: "What did you call me?"
GM: "You're so stunned to hear your correct name, one of the villians blindsides you."

[VR Dragon]

My Favorite? And it was something I did as the player!

In a Rifts game we the group are adventuring around down in the swamps of whats left of Florida. The Four Horsemen are running around doing stuff and making the Rifts world even more like hell on earth. So we are tracking down Pestilence in florida for something and a after finding him a battle starts.

So during the Fight my character who was a super powered human goes flying at pestilence for a power punch. Rolled the dice Blamo a 1! Yay....

He parried with some polearm spear thing and I get impaled on it. Well down to only a few MDC and knowing I was going to die. The GM reminded me I am hero on a stick and pestilence has my arms pinned to my sides pulling me off. He asks me what am I going to do?

"I am going to bite him on the nose."

Talking stops, everyone looks at me deadpaned. If the GM would have been drinking I would have had a shower.

"You do what?"

"I bite him on the nose."

"You sure you want to do that?"

"I'm dead once he rips this spear out of my chest. So I am going to do the one thing I could think of."

"Umm. okay...."

I roll dice... natural 20 (where was this before sheesh)

GM" Okay roll Damage, 1d4 for a human bite and its MD since you have SNPS."

1d4 rolled comes up a 1!

GM, " Okay everyone watches as your trapped and pinned on the spear and just before Pestilence rips the spear out of your chest, you lean as far forward as you can and bit him on the nose."

Pestilence wasn't happy and I payed for it but that was my most favorite ending I have had. Explain a mortal human biting one of the four horsemen on the nose to the other horsemen.

[Khanibal]

Heh, never surrender.

[Anthar]

I had a player using a Rifts supermutant with Alter Physical Stucture: Metal and Sonic speed. Out in the New West the party encountered a T-Rex, everyone either was riding a fast vehicle or like "Speedy" could get around on their own. The T-Rex took an inital chomp after the party, which was avoided the party sped by the beast and could have mad an easy gettaway when "Speedy" said "I'm turning around and charging the T-Rex". Intested as always to see what would hapen I asked him what he was going to do. He said "I'm going to ram up it's anus and tear it apart from the inside." Let's just say after a few lucky rolls and some standard "are you sure?" warnings he managed to make himself a human suppository. What the "Speedy" didn't realize was he was not very strong(PS around 30) so once he got himself up in there he was stuck. I figured that the T-Rex would do what any creature would do if they got a foreign object in there and they couldn't reach it... it immediately started scooting of of anyting it could find handy. Now "Speedy" despite several chances at pulling himself free decided to pursue his original course of action. Eventually "Speedy" passed out from overwhelming fumes and lack of air, then reverted back to flesh form, then the T-Rex was finally able to remove the "object" in a red smear on the canyon wall.

[keir451]

I had a guy playing NEMA Peackeeper Soldier that got in to a fight with a Manhunter Bot (the on with the scythe) during combat he decides to climb up the back of the bot to try shooting it in the head, complained loudly when the bot threw him off, a few seconds later bot is fighting a Bull Dog MAstiff 'bot, Peacekeeper WALKS up to Manhunter 'bot sticks plasma rifle into hole directly against the bots power core ... and pulls the trigger. Resultant detonation killed him.

[The Beast]

In one Rifts game I had an Ancient Master, and made the mistake of pestering the GM for a padawan. He finally gave in and made one, a Crazy.

[runebeo]

Our monster hunter turned into his 40 foot tall Norse giant tattoo form and talked a tribe of Brodkill to raid a CS convoy. The convoy was late and he ran out of time and become True Atlantean again. He told the tribe he did so not be spotted, well they attacked him after he couldn't change back. Only thing that saved him was the convoy seen the tribe's lazer fire and the character was using his skunk tattoo as cover fire.

[random_username]

My Techno-Wizard PC walking along in a small party (3 total PCs). The main tank was a super ability PC with Invulnerability, Supersonic Flight, and Supernatural PS. There was one other PC possibly a low-medium power armor user (Samson or whatever).

Wandering through wilderness when out pops 7 or 8 heavy robot vehicles (Abolishers or Heavy Titans or something). The form a very spread out semi-circle in a concave arc in front of use all around 500 feet away and spaced out at least 100 feet between them. They are starting to open fire on us.

Initiative rolled... super ability tank guy wins... hits full mach one speed heading back the direction we came from and is out of sight before any of the remaining party members could say @#%!@%.

My main dilemma at that point was whether to fire at the line of heavy robot vehicles OR turn and fire on the @#%!@%# son of a @#%@!% that !@#%@ed off in the other direction. Even if only for symbolic satisfaction.

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Note: the Invulnerable player was new to Rifts and really didn't understand his character or the game mechanics. It was still shocking though.

[LostOne]

The main tank was a super ability PC with Invulnerability, Supersonic Flight, and Supernatural PS.

Initiative rolled... super ability tank guy wins... hits full mach one speed heading back the direction we came from and is out of sight before any of the remaining party members could say @#%!@%.

In one of my old groups that would have elicited a physical response out of character. As I think the other players would have beat the player, or at least slugged him hard in the shoulder.

I've never seen a character with Invulnerability run from a tech fight.

[Mallak's Place]

Ok here is one that happened a few months ago. 5 new members from the Coalition join our group, one is a Coalition Psycho-Stalker (Psi-Stalker-Juicer.) The whole group was pulled into a rift and were now in the Thorn Forest in Hades (the dimension). We had just had a big fight 2 game days ago with a few dozen Demon fly riding Lasae just after we arrived, and this guy decides he is hungry, and wants to go hunting, alone (actually he was a few hundred XP from leveling).
Now our old group is full of mages and our dragon is a Nazcan Line Maker who knows the Feast Sign design, and taught it to a few other members, and any one of them would happily make him a few score wafers for him to munch on ( he was told this by the old groups Psi-Stalker), but this guy insisted on going solo.
We have a large group of players and we all bend over backwards to make time to get together to play, and our GM hates having his planed adventure side-trekked by one players decision to fly solo. If you want a solo adventure talk to the GM and he will usually set some time up away from the usual game, But never pull this stunt with everyone at the table… you’ll regret it.

So any way he goes off hunting in Hades, alone. He ends up getting captured by a Demon priest and his group of followers, taken out by a Swinging Log Trap. He wakes up tied up and butt naked in a vulnerable position hanging from the roof of a hut (think Japanese bondage) with the demon priest and several of his other male followers enjoying the feel of his hairless smooth pale skin. Just as the demon priest is about to be the first to plunder his “Assets” the rest of the group bursts in (tipped off to his danger by a Clairvoyant member of the group) to save his butt (literally).
After the battle we find out that the demon priest and his followers had thrown all his equipment into a local lava stream, including his Drug-Harness and all his drugs. So he ended up going through Detox in Hell for the next few game sessions.

[TiekoSora]

One group I played with was a mixed bag of OCCs. I forget what I was playing, but we had one juicer in the mix. We had made a successful raid on a CS base camp, a small recon element. We easily defeated the rear element left to guard the Death's Head transport and were busy gathering up the spoils when the main recon element came back and attacked. We fought them off enough to all board the transport, and one of our party members skilled in piloting managed to get us airborne without much incident. As we flew off, the bulk of us were in the rear cargo area with the rear hatch down firing at the CS troopers. As we gained altitude, we gathered around and started discussing how to best liquidate our new treasures. Nobody noticed what the juicer was up to until he said "Oh crap!" and ran out the back of the transport.

He had been fiddling with one of his many customized fusion blocks and had failed a random check, initiating the five second detonator. Everybody onboard died, he managed to survive the plunge into a body of water below.

Playing D&D3e one time, my character was a halfling rogue/warrior/cleric. I was always using a ring of invisibility and move silently to position for a backstab, and in almost all cases very successful. We were moving through a pass in some low rolling mountains and were ambushed by a large ogre. I announced my intent, and rolled my dice quite happy with the results, until I was informed that the ogre turns and attacks me, knocking me unconcious to the ground. He had seen my footprints appear in the snow, tracking me to my own ambush point.

[Noon]

We have a large group of players and we all bend over backwards to make time to get together to play, and our GM hates having his planed adventure side-trekked by one players decision to fly solo. If you want a solo adventure talk to the GM and he will usually set some time up away from the usual game, But never pull this stunt with everyone at the table… you’ll regret it.

Why not...just openly declare a rule at the table that no one can leave the group (unless they discuss it prior to play)?

I mean, why allow an action that you could easily make a rule against, yet you instead allow the ability to leave the group, but then punish people for taking the option?

[LostOne]

I had another character who wanted to be a human from a primitive dimensions where there was no technology at all. The PC was covered in a loing cloth, carrying only a waterskin and a wooden spear. One day the PC decided to ambush a CS dead boy by throwing his spear into the face of a soldier. The wooden spear snapped and the CS soldier sent about a 100 rounds of laser into this guy.

I would imagine this kind of thing has happened occasionally, you just never hear about it because the CS squashes them like a bug and it just goes in the report file as another unnoteworthy event.

[LostOne]

That reminds me of that old website that listed stupid things Rifts characters have done. Specifically, the Crazy who jumped out of a DHT (sans parachute) with the intent of shoving the primed fusion block he held into the intake of a SAMAS flying below.

I still have to wonder what made the player think this was a good idea, or what he thought would allow him to once more reach Terra Firma intact.

He was a crazy...who knows what he was thinking.

Is that website still around? Would love to read more stories like these.

[Hound]

Oh man do I have several......

One- New player.. a bit.. dim. Rolled up a Cyber-knight. First thing he did upon meeting the rest of the group was use his psychic "Detect Evil" on us. The Dragon Hatchling happened to be slowly sliding to Miscreant, so he detected this.. calmly walked up to the dragon (IN dragon form)- Pulled out his C-19 laser pistol and shot the dragon right between the eyes. The dragon player didn't even get a chance to react, the rest of the party turned the idiot into vapor.....

His reasoning? "Well, he was Evil- I Fight Evil".

Two- another campaign, the Great Horned Dragon Hatchling (a different player) tried to impress the town we were trying to protect by doing a nape of the earth flyby down the main street. One Problem- a one horse town with a 20 foot wide street. A Dragon with a forty foot wingspan- you do the math. we spent the next 3 months game time rebuilding the whole town.

Three- One player was a Asgardian Dwarf with a Rune sword that she could throw and it would fly off and attack by itself. But she had to Throw it to activate. We were in a APC being chased by bandits, she's in the back. She states "I lean out the window and drop my sword". The GM looks at her- "you DROP your sword?" 'Yes, I drop my sword". OK.. so the bandits now stop and pick up the nice trophy they found stuck in the mud........

Four- We were playing a Four Horsemen Africa campaign, and I was playing a African Witch Doctor, with the magical walking stick they get. We managed to defeat 3 Horsemen and we are all gearing up for the fight with Death. Huge Epic Battle going on.. and somehow I found my character eye-level with Death himself. My Gm looks at me and says "quick.. what do you do?" Without missing a beat.. my reply? "I poke Death in the Eye with my Stick!!!!!" Best Character death I ever endured...

[Severus Snape]

One that happened while playing shadowrun: The group is in a house, attempting to jack into the seattle computer network and then attack a large corporation (via cyber-jacking). Now, deckers are pretty much on their own while they are doing this, and they can't really do much else. Takes all their concentration. So he's in the middle of this, and the police come knocking on the door. Apparently, he forgot to use any security measures while hacking in, the alarm went off, gave the police our location, and they show up. The rest of us run out the back door, not wanting to be caught. The police enter the room he's in to arrest him. When asked what he's doing, he responds to the gm "I'm jacked in. I continue to hack the network." In front of the cops. Who are not happy.


Another one playing shadowrun: We're running through empty warehouses trying to escape from a nasty mage and the group of Wendigos he decided to "tame" for his own evil purposes. We're running through one warehouse, and there are 2 exits: a set of doors that leads out to the docks and down to the water, where a few boats are available for...re-purposing, and a window at about waist height, directly across from another window to another warehouse, with a chain link fence in-between the two windows. 3 of us decide to run for the water, hoping to get a boat and take off. The last moron decides he wants to jump through one window, blow the other out with his remington roomsweeper, and land through the other one (window-to-window leaping, to put it shortly). The gm asks him what he's going to do about the fence. His response? "I have a roomsweeper - I'll just shoot a hole in it". Right. Chain link fences have holes in them already, and a roomsweeper is like a shotgun. The bullets went through the fence and blew out the other window. He, on the other hand, went head-first into the fence and landed very awkwardly on the ground, knocking himself out. The evil mage was more than happy to have a new "friend" to torture and play with.