Robotech Blooper Reels

[taalismn]

Night Court fan?

Oh, did they have an episode like that?

I've only seen ONE episode of Night Court, and that was when they visited Bull's apartment and discovered how well adjusted he is at home(concrete furniture, an upper door extension that Captain Gloval would have appreciated, and apparently an Olympic-sized bathtub judging from the comment "Bull, that life preserver's for visitors, right?").

[taalismn]

At the edge of town, a GMP Robot walks up to replace it's partner on guard duty:

First Robot: "Anything to report?"

Second Robot: "There was a 'Squirrel incident' at the sub-station. A lone human was found doing 'Gangnam Style' out front. I shot him and turned him over to the authorities as a precaution."

And I was wondering when 'Gangnam Style' was going to appear here...
I've already seen a brief clip(probably available on youtube) of a 'Gundam Style' using stop-motion Gundam models.

[SRoss]

Night Court fan?

Oh, did they have an episode like that?

I've only seen ONE episode of Night Court, and that was when they visited Bull's apartment and discovered how well adjusted he is at home(concrete furniture, an upper door extension that Captain Gloval would have appreciated, and apparently an Olympic-sized bathtub judging from the comment "Bull, that life preserver's for visitors, right?").

In one of the episodes John Laroquette's character, Dan Fielding, gets some type of test requiring him to abstain from sex, despite numerous temptations. He gets the results in the cafeteria, and gets this funny look. Christine yells "RUN FOR IT GIRLS!" and all the women flee, he continues to look about, the judge yells "LETS NOT TAKE ANY CHANCES GUYS!" and all the men flee.

[taalismn]

[

In one of the episodes John Laroquette's character, Dan Fielding, gets some type of test requiring him to abstain from sex, despite numerous temptations. He gets the results in the cafeteria, and gets this funny look. Christine yells "RUN FOR IT GIRLS!" and all the women flee, he continues to look about, the judge yells "LETS NOT TAKE ANY CHANCES GUYS!" and all the men flee.

Ouch...and in the Ranma 1/2 fanfiction "Girl Days" there's a character who's described as so charismatically challenged that not even dead animals want anything to do with him...

[Alpha 11]

Go back to Pg. 83 of this thread to see where the Edwards lists start...

Meanwhile:

Lynn Kyle grumps into a bar, storms up to the counter, and without asking, grabs the first full glass he sees off it, and downs it in one gulp, before taking up position on one of the barstools.
“!”
...and then immediately begins convulsing.
“!”
Sera, who has been contemplating her now-empty glass, stares at Kyle.
“That was MY drink!”
“!-?”
“It’s straight Flower of Life sap extract. And yes, it’s only safe for Invid to consume as such. On human males, it has decidedly profound effects.”
”?!?”
“Unless the appropriate cure is supplied, within twenty-four hours, your blood may boil, your heart may explode, your kidneys may elect to go on strike. Your liver may spacefold to the other side of the galaxy without the rest of you. You will go profoundly painfully mad, and then you will die, and not easily either.”
“!!”
“The only known cure is twenty-four hours of straight hot sweaty consensual sex to burn off the excess energy.”
”!!!-!!!”
“I’m married.”
“!!!-!!!!”
Every female in the bar is suddenly looking in some other direction, or suddenly snuggling up to a nearby male(some of whom look VERY surprised at the sudden attention).
“!-!-!”
Every MALE in the bar is suddenly looking in some other direction, studiously returning the attentions of their female companions, or are just leaving the establishment.
“!!!!!”
”No, you can’t do it to yourself either.”
”!!!!!!!!!!??!!!!”
”Possibly. Very well probably.”
“!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“You brought it on yourself.”
“!!??!!!??!!!!”
“Well...massive electrical shocks MIGHT slow the effects, hold off critical mass as it were...Maybe even extremely sudden and high adrenaline surges. Those might help.”
“!!!!!@~!!!!!”
With a last baleful look at everybody in the bar(ruined by the fact that his eyes keep rolling into the back of his head), Kyle staggers and lurches out of the bar.
Sera turns to the bartender who’s set out a fresh drink for her.
“You have your own generator here?”
“Ever since the First Robotech War. Why?”
“There’s a sub-station about a mile down the street. You willing to bet there’s going to be a ‘squirrel incident’ that knocks out power?”
Not surprisingly, nobody in the bar took the bet.

Oh, that one's good!

At the edge of town, a GMP Robot walks up to replace it's partner on guard duty:

First Robot: "Anything to report?"

Second Robot: "There was a 'Squirrel incident' at the sub-station. A lone human was found doing 'Gangnam Style' out front. I shot him and turned him over to the authorities as a precaution."

Night Court fan?

Oh, did they have an episode like that?

I've only seen ONE episode of Night Court, and that was when they visited Bull's apartment and discovered how well adjusted he is at home(concrete furniture, an upper door extension that Captain Gloval would have appreciated, and apparently an Olympic-sized bathtub judging from the comment "Bull, that life preserver's for visitors, right?").

Been a long time since I've seen that show.

Night Court fan?

Oh, did they have an episode like that?

I've only seen ONE episode of Night Court, and that was when they visited Bull's apartment and discovered how well adjusted he is at home(concrete furniture, an upper door extension that Captain Gloval would have appreciated, and apparently an Olympic-sized bathtub judging from the comment "Bull, that life preserver's for visitors, right?").

In one of the episodes John Laroquette's character, Dan Fielding, gets some type of test requiring him to abstain from sex, despite numerous temptations. He gets the results in the cafeteria, and gets this funny look. Christine yells "RUN FOR IT GIRLS!" and all the women flee, he continues to look about, the judge yells "LETS NOT TAKE ANY CHANCES GUYS!" and all the men flee.

[

In one of the episodes John Laroquette's character, Dan Fielding, gets some type of test requiring him to abstain from sex, despite numerous temptations. He gets the results in the cafeteria, and gets this funny look. Christine yells "RUN FOR IT GIRLS!" and all the women flee, he continues to look about, the judge yells "LETS NOT TAKE ANY CHANCES GUYS!" and all the men flee.

Ouch...and in the Ranma 1/2 fanfiction "Girl Days" there's a character who's described as so charismatically challenged that not even dead animals want anything to do with him...

Poor guy.

[taalismn]

"Lisa, not that I'm complaining, but why did a crispy-looking Lynn Kyle just try to throw himself in front of our car?"
"Probably something very strange that makes sense only to him. Drive on, Rick, just drive on."

[SRoss]

Crispy Kyle staggers into a darkened bar and slumps onto a stool.

Khyron: (Offering him a drink) "Here, you'll need this."

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

[taalismn]

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

[SRoss]

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

Actually, he runs full tilt at the wall, not realizing its made from Horizon cargo modules.

[taalismn]

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

Actually, he runs full tilt at the wall, not realizing its made from Horizon cargo modules.

No. '200' on Rick Hunter's list is "Telekinetically beat Edwards into a wall until dead."
Or it could be delayed action spell that's set off whenever Edwards hears the number of whatever dire fate has been decreed him. Or a post-hypnotic command that causes him to do himself in. So, say, hearing '300' causes Edwards to run as fast as he can (uncovered) head first into immovable objects. Get to the point where even hearing phrases like "THIS IS SPARTA!' result in him cracking his skull.

[Alpha 11]

"Lisa, not that I'm complaining, but why did a crispy-looking Lynn Kyle just try to throw himself in front of our car?"
"Probably something very strange that makes sense only to him. Drive on, Rick, just drive on."

Crispy Kyle staggers into a darkened bar and slumps onto a stool.

Khyron: (Offering him a drink) "Here, you'll need this."

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

Actually, he runs full tilt at the wall, not realizing its made from Horizon cargo modules.

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

Actually, he runs full tilt at the wall, not realizing its made from Horizon cargo modules.

No. '200' on Rick Hunter's list is "Telekinetically beat Edwards into a wall until dead."
Or it could be delayed action spell that's set off whenever Edwards hears the number of whatever dire fate has been decreed him. Or a post-hypnotic command that causes him to do himself in. So, say, hearing '300' causes Edwards to run as fast as he can (uncovered) head first into immovable objects. Get to the point where even hearing phrases like "THIS IS SPARTA!' result in him cracking his skull.

It's that No. 199?

[Arnie100]

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

(Hunter's Quarters, SDF-3)

Rick: "Lisa, I don't know where you got this little doll of Edwards, but it's pretty good for taking out my frustrations." (Throwing doll at the ceiling)

[SRoss]

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

(Hunter's Quarters, SDF-3)

Rick: "Lisa, I don't know where you got this little doll of Edwards, but it's pretty good for taking out my frustrations." (Throwing doll at the ceiling)

Lisa: (Flipping open a butterfly knife one handed) "You should try this." *THUNK!* (She stabs the doll in the back)

Edwards: (Collapsing in pain and grasping for his back) "Ohhhhh Godddd!!!"

[taalismn]

Rick: "Joney, what's with the cordless drill?"
Lisa: "Just making this doll a new -"

Edwards: (spinning around along his long axis in a blurr)
"GGGGGGGGGYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Rick: "Might want to clamp the doll in place first...see, it's spinning around and you're not going very deep."
Lisa: "Don;t worry, I got it."

[Arnie100]

Edwards: "WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!?"
Corg: "I think I'll be Mr. Snuggles for a while, excuse me..." (Runs out of the door)
Krispy Kyle: "I'll, uh, get some help, yeah that's it!"
Edwards: "Don't leave me!"

(Hunter's quarters, SDF-3)
Rick: "Lisa, do they make a Lynn Kyle one?"
Lisa: "As a matter of fact..." (Pulls out a little Lynn Kyle doll)
Rick: "This'll be fun!"

[taalismn]

Edwards: "WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!?"
Corg: "I think I'll be Mr. Snuggles for a while, excuse me..." (Runs out of the door)
Krispy Kyle: "I'll, uh, get some help, yeah that's it!"
Edwards: "Don't leave me!"

(Hunter's quarters, SDF-3)
Rick: "Lisa, do they make a Lynn Kyle one?"
Lisa: "As a matter of fact..." (Pulls out a little Lynn Kyle doll)
Rick: "This'll be fun!"

...Except that Minmei got hers first...
"Okay, let's see how you like this, Mister "I-can-drive-safely-while-intoxicated!". Oh yes!" (As she dunks the doll in alcohol)

Kyle: (trips, falls, and smashes headfirst through the window of a liquor store)"Oh noooooo......"

(Minmei then takes out an electric ignitor)

Police Dispatcher:# "Charlie-Nineteen, we have a report in your area of a break-in at a liquor store, followed by several reports of an adult male running screaming down the middle of the road trailing blue fire. Please investigate..."#

[Arnie100]

Double the fun!

(On Earth)
Lunk: "What have you got there, Scott?"
Scott: "Something I had specially made for Annie, ever since Mr. Snuggles got away."
Lunk: "Looks like a doll of...Corg?"
Scott: "Yep. I'm sure Annie will have lots of fun with this! Just check out the instruction manual!"
Lunk: "Holy crap! I want one of these!"

[Alpha 11]

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

(Hunter's Quarters, SDF-3)

Rick: "Lisa, I don't know where you got this little doll of Edwards, but it's pretty good for taking out my frustrations." (Throwing doll at the ceiling)

Corg: (Sitting down beside him) "Yeah, they're trying for 200."

Edwards: (Standing up at his booth in the back) "Nnnnooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

At which point some mysterious force begins repeatedly beating Edwards into the ceiling of his booth.

(Hunter's Quarters, SDF-3)

Rick: "Lisa, I don't know where you got this little doll of Edwards, but it's pretty good for taking out my frustrations." (Throwing doll at the ceiling)

Lisa: (Flipping open a butterfly knife one handed) "You should try this." *THUNK!* (She stabs the doll in the back)

Edwards: (Collapsing in pain and grasping for his back) "Ohhhhh Godddd!!!"

Rick: "Joney, what's with the cordless drill?"
Lisa: "Just making this doll a new -"

Edwards: (spinning around along his long axis in a blurr)
"GGGGGGGGGYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Rick: "Might want to clamp the doll in place first...see, it's spinning around and you're not going very deep."
Lisa: "Don;t worry, I got it."

Edwards: "WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!?"
Corg: "I think I'll be Mr. Snuggles for a while, excuse me..." (Runs out of the door)
Krispy Kyle: "I'll, uh, get some help, yeah that's it!"
Edwards: "Don't leave me!"

(Hunter's quarters, SDF-3)
Rick: "Lisa, do they make a Lynn Kyle one?"
Lisa: "As a matter of fact..." (Pulls out a little Lynn Kyle doll)
Rick: "This'll be fun!"

Edwards: "WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME!?"
Corg: "I think I'll be Mr. Snuggles for a while, excuse me..." (Runs out of the door)
Krispy Kyle: "I'll, uh, get some help, yeah that's it!"
Edwards: "Don't leave me!"

(Hunter's quarters, SDF-3)
Rick: "Lisa, do they make a Lynn Kyle one?"
Lisa: "As a matter of fact..." (Pulls out a little Lynn Kyle doll)
Rick: "This'll be fun!"

...Except that Minmei got hers first...
"Okay, let's see how you like this, Mister "I-can-drive-safely-while-intoxicated!". Oh yes!" (As she dunks the doll in alcohol)

Kyle: (trips, falls, and smashes headfirst through the window of a liquor store)"Oh noooooo......"

(Minmei then takes out an electric ignitor)

Police Dispatcher:# "Charlie-Nineteen, we have a report in your area of a break-in at a liquor store, followed by several reports of an adult male running screaming down the middle of the road trailing blue fire. Please investigate..."#

Double the fun!

(On Earth)
Lunk: "What have you got there, Scott?"
Scott: "Something I had specially made for Annie, ever since Mr. Snuggles got away."
Lunk: "Looks like a doll of...Corg?"
Scott: "Yep. I'm sure Annie will have lots of fun with this! Just check out the instruction manual!"
Lunk: "Holy crap! I want one of these!"

[taalismn]

Double the fun!

(On Earth)
Lunk: "What have you got there, Scott?"
Scott: "Something I had specially made for Annie, ever since Mr. Snuggles got away."
Lunk: "Looks like a doll of...Corg?"
Scott: "Yep. I'm sure Annie will have lots of fun with this! Just check out the instruction manual!"
Lunk: "Holy crap! I want one of these!"

Invid Brain: @"The problem, as this node perceives it, Prince Corg, is that somehow your undergarments have been pulled in a manner exceeeding comfortable fit parameters but not structural integrity parameters such that your lower colon is currently trying to merge with your upper respiratory tract. Please repeat that? Your verbalizations are incomprehensible, though excessive in volume."@

Invid Scout: %"Somebody gave him one hell of a wedgie."%

If Corg could focus on anything other than the abject PAIN he was currently in, he'd wonder how a Scout knew something the Brain didn't.

[SRoss]

Back at the bar...

Khyron, Kyle, Corg & Edwards: "I don't know how much more of this I can take..."

Meanwhile in the Hunter's quarters...

Rick: "Lisa what's that?"

Lisa: "Oh that, the mail finally caught up with us. It's some of my dads stuff from home."

Rick: "Your father collected Flame Throwers?"

Lisa: "Yep! This one even work!." (Blasts the Edwards doll)

Back at the bar...

Edwards: (Running in circles) "OHMYGODIAMONFIRE!!!OHMYGODIAMONFIRE!!!OHMYGODIAMONFIRE!!!"

Kyle grabs the jar of clear liquid of the bar splashes it on Edwards.

*FROOSH!!!*

Corg: "Dousing a burning human in Moonshine! I like the way you think human..."

Khyron: "Indeed, it has just enough of that Rat Bastardness to it to almost make me forget THAT WAS MY DRINK!"

[taalismn]

Kyle staggers home...stops at the local corner Convenee-Mart to pick up something to eat...he grabs a can of soup on the shelves, ignoring the gap-mouthed pimple-faced young clerk gaping at him, slams the payment on the counter, leaves, drags himself back to his flat, stomps in, turns on the kitchen burner, pulls the tab on the soup can, pours the cold soup into the sauce pan, impatiently waits for it to boil, all th4e while absently scrubbing burn soot off his face, then when the soup is steaming, he ladles a mouthful direct...
And feels an all-too-familiar tingle...
"!"
Trembling, he grabs the can, really LOOKS at it for the first time.
"Campbell's Cream of Flower of Life"
"CAUTION: CONTAINS GENUINE FLOWER OF LIFE AND FLOWER OF LIFE BY-PRODUCTS. MAY BE TOXIC TO TERRESTRIAL HUMANS. CONSULT A PHYSICIAN BEFORE CONSUMING."


Kyle, as best as he's able, stares at the can, mentally cursing the Tolerance Laws, the General Amnesty, and food corporations trying to suck up to new market segments, fling-tosses the can away, then lurches back out the door.
It's a long walk back to the power substation.....

[Alpha 11]

Double the fun!

(On Earth)
Lunk: "What have you got there, Scott?"
Scott: "Something I had specially made for Annie, ever since Mr. Snuggles got away."
Lunk: "Looks like a doll of...Corg?"
Scott: "Yep. I'm sure Annie will have lots of fun with this! Just check out the instruction manual!"
Lunk: "Holy crap! I want one of these!"

Invid Brain: @"The problem, as this node perceives it, Prince Corg, is that somehow your undergarments have been pulled in a manner exceeeding comfortable fit parameters but not structural integrity parameters such that your lower colon is currently trying to merge with your upper respiratory tract. Please repeat that? Your verbalizations are incomprehensible, though excessive in volume."@

Invid Scout: %"Somebody gave him one hell of a wedgie."%

If Corg could focus on anything other than the abject PAIN he was currently in, he'd wonder how a Scout knew something the Brain didn't.

Back at the bar...

Khyron, Kyle, Corg & Edwards: "I don't know how much more of this I can take..."

Meanwhile in the Hunter's quarters...

Rick: "Lisa what's that?"

Lisa: "Oh that, the mail finally caught up with us. It's some of my dads stuff from home."

Rick: "Your father collected Flame Throwers?"

Lisa: "Yep! This one even work!." (Blasts the Edwards doll)

Back at the bar...

Edwards: (Running in circles) "OHMYGODIAMONFIRE!!!OHMYGODIAMONFIRE!!!OHMYGODIAMONFIRE!!!"

Kyle grabs the jar of clear liquid of the bar splashes it on Edwards.

*FROOSH!!!*

Corg: "Dousing a burning human in Moonshine! I like the way you think human..."

Khyron: "Indeed, it has just enough of that Rat Bastardness to it to almost make me forget THAT WAS MY DRINK!"

Kyle staggers home...stops at the local corner Convenee-Mart to pick up something to eat...he grabs a can of soup on the shelves, ignoring the gap-mouthed pimple-faced young clerk gaping at him, slams the payment on the counter, leaves, drags himself back to his flat, stomps in, turns on the kitchen burner, pulls the tab on the soup can, pours the cold soup into the sauce pan, impatiently waits for it to boil, all th4e while absently scrubbing burn soot off his face, then when the soup is steaming, he ladles a mouthful direct...
And feels an all-too-familiar tingle...
"!"
Trembling, he grabs the can, really LOOKS at it for the first time.
"Campbell's Cream of Flower of Life"
"CAUTION: CONTAINS GENUINE FLOWER OF LIFE AND FLOWER OF LIFE BY-PRODUCTS. MAY BE TOXIC TO TERRESTRIAL HUMANS. CONSULT A PHYSICIAN BEFORE CONSUMING."


Kyle, as best as he's able, stares at the can, mentally cursing the Tolerance Laws, the General Amnesty, and food corporations trying to suck up to new market segments, fling-tosses the can away, then lurches back out the door.
It's a long walk back to the power substation.....

Should I feel sorry for any of these guys....... NNNNAAAAAAA

[taalismn]

Yep..."Cooking With Flower of Life"...it's the book that Scott Bernard and Lancer secretly fear in their wives' library....

[Alpha 11]

Yep..."Cooking With Flower of Life"...it's the book that Scott Bernard and Lancer secretly fear in their wives' library....

[taalismn]

"Hmmmm.....Flower of Life stems marinated in white wine sauce? Sounds good..."

"Lancer? You okay? You went pale all of a sudden."
"Lemme guess, tingling feeling up and down the spine? Feeling like somebody dripped ice water on your brain and tazered you behind the groin?"
"Yep. That's it exactly."
"Okay, Rand, Lunk? Odds are, Lancer's not going to make poker night next week..."
"Scott, this is another one of those 'Invid spouse' things, isn't it?"

[SRoss]

Store Clerk: "So, where are you getting the Flower of Life? I thought the Regis took all the Protoculture?"

Store Owner: "Oh, I've got my sources..."

After closing the owner opens the loading door for a shadowed figure.

Store Owner: "So, you got it?"

The figure nods and slides the crate of Flowers of Life on to the stockroom floor.

The owner then gives a brown paper bag containing adult manga and anime to the Invid Scout who skulks off.

[taalismn]

That, and the Dole Foods Corporation, canners of fine pineapple, has a few plantations in various corners of the Earth...

[Alpha 11]

"Hmmmm.....Flower of Life stems marinated in white wine sauce? Sounds good..."

"Lancer? You okay? You went pale all of a sudden."
"Lemme guess, tingling feeling up and down the spine? Feeling like somebody dripped ice water on your brain and tazered you behind the groin?"
"Yep. That's it exactly."
"Okay, Rand, Lunk? Odds are, Lancer's not going to make poker night next week..."
"Scott, this is another one of those 'Invid spouse' things, isn't it?"

Only when their spouses get "needy". And for some reason, it's happen more often.

Store Clerk: "So, where are you getting the Flower of Life? I thought the Regis took all the Protoculture?"

Store Owner: "Oh, I've got my sources..."

After closing the owner opens the loading door for a shadowed figure.

Store Owner: "So, you got it?"

The figure nods and slides the crate of Flowers of Life on to the stockroom floor.

The owner then gives a brown paper bag containing adult manga and anime to the Invid Scout who skulks off.

That, and the Dole Foods Corporation, canners of fine pineapple, has a few plantations in various corners of the Earth...

[taalismn]

Rick: "Okay, Lisa, what's with that doll and the air compressor?"
Lisa: "Pumping things up a notch."


"I say, Eddie old boy, have you put on weight?"
Edwards: "...oh...gawd....bloated feeling....urgk..."

[Alpha 11]

Rick: "Okay, Lisa, what's with that doll and the air compressor?"
Lisa: "Pumping things up a notch."


"I say, Eddie old boy, have you put on weight?"
Edwards: "...oh...gawd....bloated feeling....urgk..."

[taalismn]

Karno: (watching the above)"Micronians...pathetic barbarians..."

Musica: "Octavia, what is THAT you have?"
Octavia: "It's something one of Bowie Grant's friends got me...She called it a 'stress reduction tool'.
Musica: "It looks like a miniature of the Guard Triumvirate's Karno!"
Octavia: "Apparently if I become frustrated, I can vent my anger harmlessly on it."
Musica: "Does it work?"
Octavia: "Don't know, Haven't tried it yet."
Allegra: "Octavia, Musica! Sisters! The Guard Triumvirate just impounded our hovercar!"
Octavia: "Why that vicious little petty bastard! Just because we refuse to give him and his siblings the time of day!"*CRUNCH*

Karno: #FGRFCV #SPURGGKKKKK!!#"ACKH!"

[SRoss]

Regis: "THIS STRESS REDUCTION DOLL IS DEFECTIVE!!!"

Sera: "Umm ... Mother Regis, that's not a doll. It's Magruder."

[taalismn]

Regis: "THIS STRESS REDUCTION DOLL IS DEFECTIVE!!!"

Sera: "Umm ... Mother Regis, that's not a doll. It's Magruder."

In retrospect, dressing up in that old discarded outfit of Zor's that the Regis still kept around for some reason was NOT one of Magruder's brighter ideas....

[Alpha 11]

Karno: (watching the above)"Micronians...pathetic barbarians..."

Musica: "Octavia, what is THAT you have?"
Octavia: "It's something one of Bowie Grant's friends got me...She called it a 'stress reduction tool'.
Musica: "It looks like a miniature of the Guard Triumvirate's Karno!"
Octavia: "Apparently if I become frustrated, I can vent my anger harmlessly on it."
Musica: "Does it work?"
Octavia: "Don't know, Haven't tried it yet."
Allegra: "Octavia, Musica! Sisters! The Guard Triumvirate just impounded our hovercar!"
Octavia: "Why that vicious little petty bastard! Just because we refuse to give him and his siblings the time of day!"*CRUNCH*

Karno: #FGRFCV #SPURGGKKKKK!!#"ACKH!"

Regis: "THIS STRESS REDUCTION DOLL IS DEFECTIVE!!!"

Sera: "Umm ... Mother Regis, that's not a doll. It's Magruder."

Regis: "THIS STRESS REDUCTION DOLL IS DEFECTIVE!!!"

Sera: "Umm ... Mother Regis, that's not a doll. It's Magruder."

In retrospect, dressing up in that old discarded outfit of Zor's that the Regis still kept around for some reason was NOT one of Magruder's brighter ideas....

[taalismn]

Karno: "...nggghkkkghhkkurgklenukmmmuuuoooowwwnnnnnn...."
Bartender: "That's it, no more for you!"
Knyton: "That's one UGLY drunk."
Grel: "I'll say...what with his left arm wrapped around his head like that, and his posterior bent up to touch the back of his head, and his legs pulled up under his right armpit and his tongue pulled through his left nostril, and-"

[Alpha 11]

Karno: "...nggghkkkghhkkurgklenukmmmuuuoooowwwnnnnnn...."
Bartender: "That's it, no more for you!"
Knyton: "That's one UGLY drunk."
Grel: "I'll say...what with his left arm wrapped around his head like that, and his posterior pent up to touch the bag of his head, and his legs pulled up under his right armpit and his tongue pulled through his left nostril, and-"

[taalismn]

Khyron: "Hey Grel, wanna see something?"
(gets up, goes over to pretzel-fied Karno, begins tickling him under the chin)
Khyron: "Feel that? Bet it itches! Bet it feels strange, really strange, makes you feel like you have to breath.,.or sneeze...yes, you really want to sneeze, right now...don't you?"
Karno: "...henkkk!....nerpppkkk!....glingnk!....narffgghhhhh!!!..."
Khyron: "How about a little powdered sugar?"(puff-blow-shake)
Karno: "..nggghh!...nggghhh!!!....igggggg!!!igggg! igggggg!!!"
(Khyton quickly grabs Grel and hauls him behind a table turned on its side)
Karno: "..IGGGGGGNEEEFFFFFFFFFFF*KER-BLAM!**SPLORCH**
Bartender: "That's coming out of your tab, Khyron! AND you're cleaning it up!"

[SRoss]

Sammy: "There you are!!! I've been looking all over for you! What a horrible mess, I can't leave you alone for a second!"

Sammy hooks a leash on Khyron's collar and starts pulling him towards the door.

Khyron: "Oh by the Protoculture no!!! Grel, save me! NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Grel laughs as Khyron is dragged out of the bar. Then the bartender hands him a mop and bucket.

[taalismn]

Karno's two brothers enter the bar.
Sokol: "Hello, has anybody seen our brother? He looks kinda like us."
Grel hands them the bucket.
Bartender: "Not anymore, he doesn't."
Darsis: "BY the Protoculture! How much did he drink?! He's boneless!"
Grel: "He sneezed. It wasn't pretty."

[Alpha 11]

Khyron: "Hey Grel, wanna see something?"
(gets up, goes over to pretzel-fied Karno, begins tickling him under the chin)
Khyron: "Feel that? Bet it itches! Bet it feels strange, really strange, makes you feel like you have to breath.,.or sneeze...yes, you really want to sneeze, right now...don't you?"
Karno: "...henkkk!....nerpppkkk!....glingnk!....narffgghhhhh!!!..."
Khyron: "How about a little powdered sugar?"(puff-blow-shake)
Karno: "..nggghh!...nggghhh!!!....igggggg!!!igggg! igggggg!!!"
(Khyton quickly grabs Grel and hauls him behind a table turned on its side)
Karno: "..IGGGGGGNEEEFFFFFFFFFFF*KER-BLAM!**SPLORCH**
Bartender: "That's coming out of your tab, Khyron! AND you're cleaning it up!"

Sammy: "There you are!!! I've been looking all over for you! What a horrible mess, I can't leave you alone for a second!"

Sammy hooks a leash on Khyron's collar and starts pulling him towards the door.

Khyron: "Oh by the Protoculture no!!! Grel, save me! NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Grel laughs as Khyron is dragged out of the bar. Then the bartender hands him a mop and bucket.

Karno's two brothers enter the bar.
Sokol: "Hello, has anybody seen our brother? He looks kinda like us."
Grel hands them the bucket.
Bartender: "Not anymore, he doesn't."
Darsis: "BY the Protoculture! How much did he drink?! He's boneless!"
Grel: "He sneezed. It wasn't pretty."

[SRoss]

Corg laughed, *foolish Tirolians, weaking Zentraedi* he thought. At least HE, a Prince of the Invid, would never succumb to such lame tactics. Suddenly, he felt a sharp pain in his neck. He had enough time to see the dart he pulled out, before he fell limply to the floor.

Grel and bartender looked on as a figure humming a jaunty tune, started to drag Corg out. All they could see over the bar was the top of her E.T. [sup]tm[/sup] cap.

Annie: "Aren't these new paralysis drugs just the cat's meow Corgykins?"

Of course Corg's only response was the trail of drool heading out the door.

[taalismn]

Field Marshal Leonard wanders into the bar, bellies up to it, and loudly demandsL "Give me the strongest drink you got!"
A moment later he's wondering why everybody else in the bar seems to have vanished behind large heavy objects, and why the bartender is curiously absent...
*CLINK*
Then looks down at the counter, and at the large glass full of spirits in front of him, a live hand grenade just settling to its bottom.
He immediately sweeps his arm up and across, setting the glass sailing on its coaster down the length of the counter.
#BOOM#
The robed figure at the aforementioned end collapses in a cloud of settling shrapnel, glass fragments, and shrapnel.
@BZZ-R!@"It'S...(*spark*)N-n-N-OT--Fh-AIR!"#BRITZZZZ#
Leonard turns his attention back to the counter, where the bartender has now appeared.
"I'll have another!"

[Arnie100]

(At the bar)

Annie: "Time to come home, Corgypoo!!"
Haydonite: <<Ffffzzztttt...help...me...POP...please...ffzzztttt...I've fallen...POP...and...SPARK...I...>>
Leonard: "Shut up...at least that little kid doesn't think you're Mr. Snuggles!"
Grel: "Mr. Snuggles???"
Leonard: (Tosses Grel a pair of cat's ears) "If anyone ever causes problems, knock 'em out and put these on 'em. Then call that little kid...here's her number! Have fun!"

[Alpha 11]

Corg laughed, *foolish Tirolians, weaking Zentraedi* he thought. At least HE, a Prince of the Invid, would never succumb to such lame tactics. Suddenly, he felt a sharp pain in his neck. He had enough time to see the dart he pulled out, before he fell limply to the floor.

Grel and bartender looked on as a figure humming a jaunty tune, started to drag Corg out. All they could see over the bar was the top of her E.T. [sup]tm[/sup] cap.

Annie: "Aren't these new paralysis drugs just the cat's meow Corgykins?"

Of course Corg's only response was the trail of drool heading out the door.

Field Marshal Leonard wanders into the bar, bellies up to it, and loudly demandsL "Give me the strongest drink you got!"
A moment later he's wondering why everybody else in the bar seems to have vanished behind large heavy objects, and why the bartender is curiously absent...
*CLINK*
Then looks down at the counter, and at the large glass full of spirits in front of him, a live hand grenade just settling to its bottom.
He immediately sweeps his arm up and across, setting the glass sailing on its coaster down the length of the counter.
#BOOM#
The robed figure at the aforementioned end collapses in a cloud of settling shrapnel, glass fragments, and shrapnel.
@BZZ-R!@"It'S...(*spark*)N-n-N-OT--Fh-AIR!"#BRITZZZZ#
Leonard turns his attention back to the counter, where the bartender has now appeared.
"I'll have another!"

(At the bar)

Annie: "Time to come home, Corgypoo!!"
Haydonite: <<Ffffzzztttt...help...me...POP...please...ffzzztttt...I've fallen...POP...and...SPARK...I...>>
Leonard: "Shut up...at least that little kid doesn't think you're Mr. Snuggles!"
Grel: "Mr. Snuggles???"
Leonard: (Tosses Grel a pair of cat's ears) "If anyone ever causes problems, knock 'em out and put these on 'em. Then call that little kid...here's her number! Have fun!"

[taalismn]

(At the bar)

Annie: "Time to come home, Corgypoo!!"
Haydonite: <<Ffffzzztttt...help...me...POP...please...ffzzztttt...I've fallen...POP...and...SPARK...I...>>
Leonard: "Shut up...at least that little kid doesn't think you're Mr. Snuggles!"
Grel: "Mr. Snuggles???"
Leonard: (Tosses Grel a pair of cat's ears) "If anyone ever causes problems, knock 'em out and put these on 'em. Then call that little kid...here's her number! Have fun!"

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

[Arnie100]

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

Haydonite: <<NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!>>
Grel: "What's with him?"
Leonard: (Shrugs) "Fella can't hold his liquor..."

[taalismn]

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

Haydonite: <<NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!>>
Grel: "What's with him?"
Leonard: (Shrugs) "Fella can't hold his liquor..."

This has absolutely nothing to do with the Invid Malar holding him down while another stuffs a hose from a tanker truck just outside, stenciled "FUEL METHANOL" into the Haydonite's access ports.
Or the third Invid standing nearby holding a Zippo lighter and working its flint.
Nossireee...

[Alpha 11]

(At the bar)

Annie: "Time to come home, Corgypoo!!"
Haydonite: <<Ffffzzztttt...help...me...POP...please...ffzzztttt...I've fallen...POP...and...SPARK...I...>>
Leonard: "Shut up...at least that little kid doesn't think you're Mr. Snuggles!"
Grel: "Mr. Snuggles???"
Leonard: (Tosses Grel a pair of cat's ears) "If anyone ever causes problems, knock 'em out and put these on 'em. Then call that little kid...here's her number! Have fun!"

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

Haydonite: <<NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!>>
Grel: "What's with him?"
Leonard: (Shrugs) "Fella can't hold his liquor..."

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

Haydonite: <<NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!>>
Grel: "What's with him?"
Leonard: (Shrugs) "Fella can't hold his liquor..."

This has absolutely nothing to do with the Invid Malar holding him down while another stuffs a hose from a tanker truck just outside, stenciled "FUEL METHANOL" into the Haydonite's access ports.
Or the third Invid standing nearby holding a Zippo lighter and working its flint.
Nossireee...

[SRoss]

Bartender: "You're a mean drunk. Mister Leonard."
Leonard: "Not nearly mean OR drunk enough! Gimme another of those 'Depth Charge' thingies."

Haydonite: <<NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!>>
Grel: "What's with him?"
Leonard: (Shrugs) "Fella can't hold his liquor..."

This has absolutely nothing to do with the Invid Malar holding him down while another stuffs a hose from a tanker truck just outside, stenciled "FUEL METHANOL" into the Haydonite's access ports.
Or the third Invid standing nearby holding a Zippo lighter and working its flint.
Nossireee...

Sera: (Taking the lighter) "Give me that! You need fingers to use one of these." (Lighting the fumes) "Now everyone leap with your arms spread out." (Teleports away as the bar explodes)

[taalismn]

Sera: "And THAT is why we call it a 'Haydonite Cocktail'!"
Bartender: "You know, that's coming out of your tab."
Leonard: "That's like, what, the eighth time you're rebuilding the bar?"
Grel: "Ninth. There was Lord Breetai's brawl with Lord Reno last month."
Leonard: "Oh right! Took out the entire city block, right?"
Grel: "NEVER insult Lord Breetai's woman. NEVER."
Bartender: "Gloval's worse. Insult his bridge crew or HIS woman."
Leonard: "Why? What's the worst that old guy can do?"
Grel: "That would be the reasons behind rebuilds five and six, correct?"
Bartender:(shivering) "Yep."