Robotech Blooper Reels

[Arnie100]

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

[taalismn]

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

That's straight from the 'Living Dead'...Zombie: "Send more policemen."

Well, the BSS have SEEN that movie, and they've LIVED through similar, and they know all the tricks.
"Sure, we're coming! Just hold position there! Over!....Okay, that was a dead man on the other end...carpet bomb with Zomb-Ex, then we send in the Golems with the plasma guns and the septex-sprayers."

Monsters in the vents? That's what the Iron Weasels are for....

[Arnie100]

- "Hello, BioSanitation Squad? No, wait! Don't hang up! Seriously, this IS an emer --, I'm sorry, baby-poo, you'll have to wait for your snack! I'll try the GMP next, pumpkin, I'm sure we'll find something for you to eat!"

[SRoss]

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

That's straight from the 'Living Dead'...Zombie: "Send more policemen."

Well, the BSS have SEEN that movie, and they've LIVED through similar, and they know all the tricks.
"Sure, we're coming! Just hold position there! Over!....Okay, that was a dead man on the other end...carpet bomb with Zomb-Ex, then we send in the Golems with the plasma guns and the septex-sprayers."

Monsters in the vents? That's what the Iron Weasels are for....

I thought that was what Kyle was for?

[Arnie100]

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

That's straight from the 'Living Dead'...Zombie: "Send more policemen."

Well, the BSS have SEEN that movie, and they've LIVED through similar, and they know all the tricks.
"Sure, we're coming! Just hold position there! Over!....Okay, that was a dead man on the other end...carpet bomb with Zomb-Ex, then we send in the Golems with the plasma guns and the septex-sprayers."

Monsters in the vents? That's what the Iron Weasels are for....

I thought that was what Kyle was for?

BioSanitation Squad Commander: "Nonono...we use Edwards in the vents and Kyle goes in the sewers; since Kyle's mind is always in the gutter, anyways. The right person for the right job! Ain't that right, boys?"

[taalismn]

- "Hello, BioSanitation Squad? No, wait! Don't hang up! Seriously, this IS an emer --, I'm sorry, baby-poo, you'll have to wait for your snack! I'll try the GMP next, pumpkin, I'm sure we'll find something for you to eat!"

"Hello, GMP? I'd like to report a dire emergency! My baby's stuck in the ventilation system and-"
#"We saw that movie too."#Klick!
"Oh pits! I know, I'll call the Civil Defense uni-"
ring-ring!
"Hello?"
#"Civil Defense Unit here, ma'am. Just thought we'd let you know we've thrown a 'Cloverfield'--grade containment cordon around your house. Have a nice day."#
"Pumpkin, I think they have information sharing...."

[Alpha 11]

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

That's straight from the 'Living Dead'...Zombie: "Send more policemen."

Well, the BSS have SEEN that movie, and they've LIVED through similar, and they know all the tricks.
"Sure, we're coming! Just hold position there! Over!....Okay, that was a dead man on the other end...carpet bomb with Zomb-Ex, then we send in the Golems with the plasma guns and the septex-sprayers."

Monsters in the vents? That's what the Iron Weasels are for....

- "Hello, BioSanitation Squad? No, wait! Don't hang up! Seriously, this IS an emer --, I'm sorry, baby-poo, you'll have to wait for your snack! I'll try the GMP next, pumpkin, I'm sure we'll find something for you to eat!"

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

That's straight from the 'Living Dead'...Zombie: "Send more policemen."

Well, the BSS have SEEN that movie, and they've LIVED through similar, and they know all the tricks.
"Sure, we're coming! Just hold position there! Over!....Okay, that was a dead man on the other end...carpet bomb with Zomb-Ex, then we send in the Golems with the plasma guns and the septex-sprayers."

Monsters in the vents? That's what the Iron Weasels are for....

I thought that was what Kyle was for?

Oh ya!

- "Aaaawww...is the wittle baby-poo hungry again? Hello? BioSanitation Squad? There's some THING; not you pumpkin, running around in the ventilation...can you send a platoon over? Thank you! There, there, hon...dinner'll be ready soon!"

That's straight from the 'Living Dead'...Zombie: "Send more policemen."

Well, the BSS have SEEN that movie, and they've LIVED through similar, and they know all the tricks.
"Sure, we're coming! Just hold position there! Over!....Okay, that was a dead man on the other end...carpet bomb with Zomb-Ex, then we send in the Golems with the plasma guns and the septex-sprayers."

Monsters in the vents? That's what the Iron Weasels are for....

I thought that was what Kyle was for?

BioSanitation Squad Commander: "Nonono...we use Edwards in the vents and Kyle goes in the sewers; since Kyle's mind is always in the gutter, anyways. The right person for the right job! Ain't that right, boys?"

Perfect!

- "Hello, BioSanitation Squad? No, wait! Don't hang up! Seriously, this IS an emer --, I'm sorry, baby-poo, you'll have to wait for your snack! I'll try the GMP next, pumpkin, I'm sure we'll find something for you to eat!"

"Hello, GMP? I'd like to report a dire emergency! My baby's stuck in the ventilation system and-"
#"We saw that movie too."#Klick!
"Oh pits! I know, I'll call the Civil Defense uni-"
ring-ring!
"Hello?"
#"Civil Defense Unit here, ma'am. Just thought we'd let you know we've thrown a 'Cloverfield'--grade containment cordon around your house. Have a nice day."#
"Pumpkin, I think they have information sharing...."

[Arnie100]

- "Hello; yes this BSS HQ! Your mother's missing in the vents!? That's terrible! We'll send someone over right away! Kyle! Edwards! Get to this address right away!"

[taalismn]

"So, they've cordoned us off? Guess we'll just have to order out. Yes, pumpkin, I know pizza delivery boys tend to be raw, stringy, and greasy, but they're protein, right? And we can't be too picky. #beep-boop-beep-beep# Hello? Monument Pizza? I'd like to order a Manly Pizza to be delivered? With everything. Extra breadsticks and heavy on the sauce. Well, as soon as possible, of course. I'll pay extra for fast delivery. Okay, we'll be waiting. (#boip#) Well, pumpkin, they're coming over."

"Mondo Control to Mondo Five; be advised that your delivery location is a CU Code Clover, over?"
"Mondo Five to Mondo Control, acknowledge. Recieving navigation download."
"CDFC Air Control to Mondo Five, we'll be looking over your shoulder. You have a corridor cleared for your mission at the following coordinates."
"Mondo Five to CDFC Air Control. We acknowledge and thank you."
(POV cuts back to show a Logan Veritech with what looks like a slot-shaped opening where the nose gun should be. The Logan is in bright colors and sports 'MONUMENT PIZZA' on its wings and fins and the insignia of a pizza held up by a stone statue(or maybe it's sitting atop an Easter Island statue). The Logan is currently zipping along at treetop level)
(Cut to: Pilot HUD...Star Wars 'X-Wing Trench View'-style)
"Activating payload rotation."
(Cut to what looks like a record turntable or radome under the Logan's nose, spinning up)
"Payload rotation optimal. Entering approach corridor.....lining up, steady, steady, steady."
(HUD goes red framed just like in 'Star Wars')
"Payload away! Break! Break!"
The Logan goes peeling up and over the heads of the cordon of Civil Defense Unit soldiers, mecha, and vehicles as a disk goes frisbeeing overhead and through a window...

*CRASH*
"What?! Oh...oh pits.....Pumpkin? You're going to have learn to like pepperoni..."

[SRoss]

"CDU FiveNiner to BSS SierraTango, we've got movement in the sewers."

"Copy FiveNiner. SierraTango to BSS GolfHotelQuebec, Edwards and Kyle are tied up right now."

"Roger, deploying Khyron."

"Who keeps recruiting these guys for us?"

Cut to Grell sitting behind a desk smoking a cigar and counting cash.

[SailorCallie]

"CDU FiveNiner to BSS SierraTango, we've got movement in the sewers."

"Copy FiveNiner. SierraTango to BSS GolfHotelQuebec, Edwards and Kyle are tied up right now."

"Roger, deploying Khyron."

"Who keeps recruiting these guys for us?"

Cut to Grell sitting behind a desk smoking a cigar and counting cash.

Grell: Heh-heh-heh. All these years of Khyron treating me like, as the micronians called it, crap, I finally got even with that jerk.

[taalismn]

Grell: Heh-heh-heh. All these years of Khyron treating me like, as the micronians called it, crap, I finally got even with that jerk.

Interesting to note that in the Zentraedi TOE, red uniforms actually denote HIGHER ranks. The bottom rung mooks wear khaki.
Doesn't stop them from getting smoked like a serious nicotine habit.

Of course, 'redshirt syndrome' breaks back down in their opposition in the UEDF, thanks to the VF-1As being a nice shade of tan/brown...and they get wasted all the time.

Invid Scouts are, of course, RED, meaning skeet-shooting applies to them with a vengeance.

[Arnie100]

Grell: "Hmmm...that's strange...I hear something in the vents...let's go see...YEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!"
Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmm...nomnomnomnomnom!"
Mother: "Thank you, Mr. Khyron for finding my pumpkin something to eat. It's been rather difficult the last few days!"
Khyron: "Believe me, the pleasure was all mine!"

[taalismn]

Grell: "Hmmm...that's strange...I hear something in the vents...let's go see...YEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!"
Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmm...nomnomnomnomnom!"
Mother: "Thank you, Mr. Khyron for finding my pumpkin something to eat. It's been rather difficult the last few days!"
Khyron: "Believe me, the pleasure was all mine!"

Khyron: "Is that your pizza, ma'am?"
Mother: "Why yes! Care to share?"
Khyron: "Why certainly! Ah...why is it smoking?"
Mother: "Monument Pizza hot and fresh airborne delivery with everything, including pineapples!"
(On the side of the box where they can't see it, the boxes for 'napalm', 'plastique', 'white phosphorus' and 'fragmentation grenades' are checked off)
Mother: "Have a slice?"
Khyron: "Of cou-"
#BLAM#

[Arnie100]

Mother: "Well, pumpkin...it looks like you'll have desert with your pizza! How about that?"

[taalismn]

Mother: "Well, pumpkin...it looks like you'll have desert with your pizza! How about that?"

You DO know that a Monument Pineapple Surprise Pizza with everything serves a FAMILY? And an entire city block for that matter(a CONDEMNED city block, naturally). Area of effect, so EVERYBODY in the blast radius gets that pepperoni tingle of nitrated meats blasted through their bodies(it's all in the shaped charge crust).

[Arnie100]

Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmmm...BBBBBBBUUUUUUUUURRRPPPPP!! Like pizza want MORE!"
Mother: "My, that was a BIG one!!"

(Meanwhile, in the sewers)

Edwards: "Did you hear that? By the way, you figure out the motion tracker yet?"
Kyle: "I've got movement! Tracker's off scale, man! I've got multiple signals all over the place, man!"
Edwards: "Where, Kyle!? I don't see sh1t!"
Kyle: "It's over, man! Game over, man! What the fvck are we gonna, do, man!? What the fvck are we gonna, do!?"
Edwards: "You watched that movie, again. Didn't you, Kyle?"
Kyle: (Sheepishly): "Yeah..."
Edwards: "You seriously need some help, dude."

(Motion tracker gets louder and louder and louder)

[Alpha 11]

- "Hello; yes this BSS HQ! Your mother's missing in the vents!? That's terrible! We'll send someone over right away! Kyle! Edwards! Get to this address right away!"

"So, they've cordoned us off? Guess we'll just have to order out. Yes, pumpkin, I know pizza delivery boys tend to be raw, stringy, and greasy, but they're protein, right? And we can't be too picky. #beep-boop-beep-beep# Hello? Monument Pizza? I'd like to order a Manly Pizza to be delivered? With everything. Extra breadsticks and heavy on the sauce. Well, as soon as possible, of course. I'll pay extra for fast delivery. Okay, we'll be waiting. (#boip#) Well, pumpkin, they're coming over."

"Mondo Control to Mondo Five; be advised that your delivery location is a CU Code Clover, over?"
"Mondo Five to Mondo Control, acknowledge. Recieving navigation download."
"CDFC Air Control to Mondo Five, we'll be looking over your shoulder. You have a corridor cleared for your mission at the following coordinates."
"Mondo Five to CDFC Air Control. We acknowledge and thank you."
(POV cuts back to show a Logan Veritech with what looks like a slot-shaped opening where the nose gun should be. The Logan is in bright colors and sports 'MONUMENT PIZZA' on its wings and fins and the insignia of a pizza held up by a stone statue(or maybe it's sitting atop an Easter Island statue). The Logan is currently zipping along at treetop level)
(Cut to: Pilot HUD...Star Wars 'X-Wing Trench View'-style)
"Activating payload rotation."
(Cut to what looks like a record turntable or radome under the Logan's nose, spinning up)
"Payload rotation optimal. Entering approach corridor.....lining up, steady, steady, steady."
(HUD goes red framed just like in 'Star Wars')
"Payload away! Break! Break!"
The Logan goes peeling up and over the heads of the cordon of Civil Defense Unit soldiers, mecha, and vehicles as a disk goes frisbeeing overhead and through a window...

*CRASH*
"What?! Oh...oh pits.....Pumpkin? You're going to have learn to like pepperoni..."

"CDU FiveNiner to BSS SierraTango, we've got movement in the sewers."

"Copy FiveNiner. SierraTango to BSS GolfHotelQuebec, Edwards and Kyle are tied up right now."

"Roger, deploying Khyron."

"Who keeps recruiting these guys for us?"

Cut to Grell sitting behind a desk smoking a cigar and counting cash.

In the background we see clone camber.

"CDU FiveNiner to BSS SierraTango, we've got movement in the sewers."

"Copy FiveNiner. SierraTango to BSS GolfHotelQuebec, Edwards and Kyle are tied up right now."

"Roger, deploying Khyron."

"Who keeps recruiting these guys for us?"

Cut to Grell sitting behind a desk smoking a cigar and counting cash.

Grell: Heh-heh-heh. All these years of Khyron treating me like, as the micronians called it, crap, I finally got even with that jerk.

Grell: Heh-heh-heh. All these years of Khyron treating me like, as the micronians called it, crap, I finally got even with that jerk.

Interesting to note that in the Zentraedi TOE, red uniforms actually denote HIGHER ranks. The bottom rung mooks wear khaki.
Doesn't stop them from getting smoked like a serious nicotine habit.

Of course, 'redshirt syndrome' breaks back down in their opposition in the UEDF, thanks to the VF-1As being a nice shade of tan/brown...and they get wasted all the time.

Invid Scouts are, of course, RED, meaning skeet-shooting applies to them with a vengeance.

True.

Grell: "Hmmm...that's strange...I hear something in the vents...let's go see...YEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!"
Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmm...nomnomnomnomnom!"
Mother: "Thank you, Mr. Khyron for finding my pumpkin something to eat. It's been rather difficult the last few days!"
Khyron: "Believe me, the pleasure was all mine!"

Grell: "Hmmm...that's strange...I hear something in the vents...let's go see...YEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!"
Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmm...nomnomnomnomnom!"
Mother: "Thank you, Mr. Khyron for finding my pumpkin something to eat. It's been rather difficult the last few days!"
Khyron: "Believe me, the pleasure was all mine!"

Khyron: "Is that your pizza, ma'am?"
Mother: "Why yes! Care to share?"
Khyron: "Why certainly! Ah...why is it smoking?"
Mother: "Monument Pizza hot and fresh airborne delivery with everything, including pineapples!"
(On the side of the box where they can't see it, the boxes for 'napalm', 'plastique', 'white phosphorus' and 'fragmentation grenades' are checked off)
Mother: "Have a slice?"
Khyron: "Of cou-"
#BLAM#

Mother: "Well, pumpkin...it looks like you'll have desert with your pizza! How about that?"

Mother: "Well, pumpkin...it looks like you'll have desert with your pizza! How about that?"

You DO know that a Monument Pineapple Surprise Pizza with everything serves a FAMILY? And an entire city block for that matter(a CONDEMNED city block, naturally). Area of effect, so EVERYBODY in the blast radius gets that pepperoni tingle of nitrated meats blasted through their bodies(it's all in the shaped charge crust).

Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmmm...BBBBBBBUUUUUUUUURRRPPPPP!! Like pizza want MORE!"
Mother: "My, that was a BIG one!!"

(Meanwhile, in the sewers)

Edwards: "Did you hear that? By the way, you figure out the motion tracker yet?"
Kyle: "I've got movement! Tracker's off scale, man! I've got multiple signals all over the place, man!"
Edwards: "Where, Kyle!? I don't see sh1t!"
Kyle: "It's over, man! Game over, man! What the fvck are we gonna, do, man!? What the fvck are we gonna, do!?"
Edwards: "You watched that movie, again. Didn't you, Kyle?"
Kyle: (Sheepishly): "Yeah..."
Edwards: "You seriously need some help, dude."

(Motion tracker gets louder and louder and louder)

[SRoss]

Grell: "Hmmm...that's strange...I hear something in the vents...let's go see...YEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!"
Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmm...nomnomnomnomnom!"
Mother: "Thank you, Mr. Khyron for finding my pumpkin something to eat. It's been rather difficult the last few days!"
Khyron: "Believe me, the pleasure was all mine!"

Grell: (Studying the mess at his office vent via remote camera.) "Hmmm... I'm glad I loaned Gero my office, and cloak."

[SRoss]

Mother: "Well pumpkin, how do you feel about Chinese?"

-#RING!#-

Uncle Max: "White Dragon restaurant. Yes, one family special, no problem mam. MINMEI! Be a dear and make this delivery for me."

Minmei: "No problem Uncle Max."

Later,

"Ummm... This is CDU TwoFourteen, I've got a Type 99 tank coming through the perimeter."

[Arnie100]

Mother: "Oh; look, pumpkin! They even gave you a toy with your meal! How thoughtful of them!"

[Alpha 11]

Grell: "Hmmm...that's strange...I hear something in the vents...let's go see...YEEEEAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!"
Baby 'Thing': "Mmmmm...nomnomnomnomnom!"
Mother: "Thank you, Mr. Khyron for finding my pumpkin something to eat. It's been rather difficult the last few days!"
Khyron: "Believe me, the pleasure was all mine!"

Grell: (Studying the mess at his office vent via remote camera.) "Hmmm... I'm glad I loaned Gero my office, and cloak."

Mother: "Well pumpkin, how do you feel about Chinese?"

-#RING!#-

Uncle Max: "White Dragon restaurant. Yes, one family special, no problem mam. MINMEI! Be a dear and make this delivery for me."

Minmei: "No problem Uncle Max."

Later,

"Ummm... This is CDU TwoFourteen, I've got a Type 99 tank coming through the perimeter."

Mother: "Oh; look, pumpkin! They even gave you a toy with your meal! How thoughtful of them!"

[SRoss]

The Tank stops in front of the door.

Minmei: "Ok, first! Single round from coaxial gun."

#BLAM!# #Ding Dong#

Mother: "The doorbell? So soon?"

Minmei: (Opening the breach to bore sight the main gun.) "Now the delivery."

#BOOOOMMM!#

Minmei: (On loudspeaker) "ALL RIGHT YOU! THE NEXT ROUND ISN'T FOOD! STUFF $63.[sup]95[/sup] IN THE STICKY BALL PROVIDED AND THROW IT AT THE TANK! Oh and enjoy the meal."

Mother: "Oh dear Pumpkin, she's too smart for us, I hope you like Chow Main?"

Meanwhile, in the Monument Pizza Logan on final approach.

"CRAP!!! I FORGOT TO GET THE MONEY!!!"

[taalismn]

Meanwhile, in the Monument Pizza Logan on final approach.

"CRAP!!! I FORGOT TO GET THE MONEY!!!"

Monument Pizza only takes online credit or debit card/electronic fund transfer transactions for delivery runs. Especially when CDU/CDC cordons are concerned.

The mother should be glad she didn't order the Chili Con Carnage.

[Arnie100]

Mother: "So; pumpkin, what should we try next? Hmmm? Mexican sounds like a good idea! Should we try for take out?"

(Outside the house)

CDU Officer: "Holy cr@p! All units, on the alert! Subjects are attempting a breach of the perimeter!"

[taalismn]

CDU Officer: "Holy cr@p! All units, on the alert! Subjects are attempting a breach of the perimeter!"

CDU Officer: "Corporal Mather? You bought take-out?"
Cpl Mather: "Yes sir, I did. Why?"
CDU Officer: "Is that Chili Con Carnage I see? Have you opened it yet?"
Cpl: Mather: "...is the block still standing? Are we still alive?"
CDU Officer: "I'm not going to ask what you're doing with the stuff. Just give it here!"

[SRoss]

CDU Commander: "Alright! This is it prepare for battle!"

BSS Commander: "Cue battle music!"

Where Kyle and Edwards are trying to hide, the motion tracker suddenly grows a speaker.

Edwards and Kyle: (Together) "OH CRAP!"

ASC Standard Battle Mood Muisic

[Arnie100]

CDU Commander: "Alright! I need a volunteer to deliver the Chili Con Carnage to that house over where the subjects are attempting to breach the perimeter! Where's Edwards and Kyle? Still in the sewers? Khyron! Excellent of you to volunteer for this mission!"
Khyron: "I hate this job...when I get my hands on Gerao or Grell...I was one of the most feared warlords in the Zentraedi military...now I'm doing these crappy jobs..."

[SRoss]

CDU Commander: "Alright! I need a volunteer to deliver the Chili Con Carnage to that house over where the subjects are attempting to breach the perimeter! Where's Edwards and Kyle? Still in the sewers? Khyron! Excellent of you to volunteer for this mission!"
Khyron: "I hate this job...when I get my hands on Gerao or Grell...I was one of the most feared warlords in the Zentraedi military...now I'm doing these crappy jobs..."

Meanwhile, Grell and Azonia sit back and watch the CCT Camera footage on the big screen while drinking.

[taalismn]

Chili Con Carnage---aka 'Aztecs' Revenge', 'Bean Bomb'. the first bean-based dish ever to be granted WMD status. Early recipes were said to have been developed in Mexico during the reign of Santa "Take No Prisoners" Anna, but even HE dared not deploy it against those Texans. The recipes disappeared into history, but rumors of experiments using the advancing hotter peppers being bred circulated, including reports of atrocities in various corners of Mexico.
Chili Con Carnage roared unto the world stage after the Rain of Death when it ironically surfaced in the hands of Zentraedi Malcontents who used it against the nascent Southern Cross. An entire division of ASC starved to death after having their tastebuds flayed by CCC slipped into their rations. The particular potency of this incarnation of the dish has been traced to the development by Zentraedi farmers of the feared 'Dolza's Rage' chili pepper, said by some to be a crossbreed with Flower of Life. All known seeds and plantings of the Zentraedi chili pepper were subsequently seized by the UEDF and Chili Con Carnage was declared a controlled substance by the UEG(some wanted to ban it altogether), but again rumors tell of clandestine gardens growing the pepper and black market kitchens preparing the dish. It wasn't until after the Third Robotech War that the UEG admitted to licensing the dish to mercenary freelancer diners and special ops KP units, after it became known that a Tirolian battleship squadron that assaulted Mexico City was annihilated after seizing food supplies in the area. Later accounts tell of an Invid Hive being MELTED when South American guerillas delivered a 'special' using unsuspecting Invid collaborators as the delivery system.

[SailorCallie]

Chili Con Carnage---aka 'Aztecs' Revenge', 'Bean Bomb'. the first bean-based dish ever to be granted WMD status. Early recipes were said to have been developed in Mexico during the reign of Santa "Take No Prisoners" Anna, but even HE dared not deploy it against those Texans. The recipes disappeared into history, but rumors of experiments using the advancing hotter peppers being bred circulated, including reports of atrocities in various corners of Mexico.
Chili Con Carnage roared unto the world stage after the Rain of Death when it ironically surfaced in the hands of Zentraedi Malcontents who used it against the nascent Southern Cross. An entire division of ASC starved to death after having their tastebuds flayed by CCC slipped into their rations. The particular potency of this incarnation of the dish has been traced to the development by Zentraedi farmers of the feared 'Dolza's Rage' chili pepper, said by some to be a crossbreed with Flower of Life. All known seeds and plantings of the Zentraedi chili pepper were subsequently seized by the UEDF and Chili Con Carnage was declared a controlled substance by the UEG(some wanted to ban it altogether), but again rumors tell of clandestine gardens growing the pepper and black market kitchens preparing the dish. It wasn't until after the Third Robotech War that the UEG admitted to licensing the dish to mercenary freelancer diners and special ops KP units, after it became known that a Tirolian battleship squadron that assaulted Mexico City was annihilated after seizing food supplies in the area. Later accounts tell of an Invid Hive being MELTED when South American guerillas delivered a 'special' using unsuspecting Invid collaborators as the delivery system.

I'm a Texan, and I APPROVE of this message.

[Arnie100]

Chili Con Carnage---aka 'Aztecs' Revenge', 'Bean Bomb'. the first bean-based dish ever to be granted WMD status. Early recipes were said to have been developed in Mexico during the reign of Santa "Take No Prisoners" Anna, but even HE dared not deploy it against those Texans. The recipes disappeared into history, but rumors of experiments using the advancing hotter peppers being bred circulated, including reports of atrocities in various corners of Mexico.
Chili Con Carnage roared unto the world stage after the Rain of Death when it ironically surfaced in the hands of Zentraedi Malcontents who used it against the nascent Southern Cross. An entire division of ASC starved to death after having their tastebuds flayed by CCC slipped into their rations. The particular potency of this incarnation of the dish has been traced to the development by Zentraedi farmers of the feared 'Dolza's Rage' chili pepper, said by some to be a crossbreed with Flower of Life. All known seeds and plantings of the Zentraedi chili pepper were subsequently seized by the UEDF and Chili Con Carnage was declared a controlled substance by the UEG(some wanted to ban it altogether), but again rumors tell of clandestine gardens growing the pepper and black market kitchens preparing the dish. It wasn't until after the Third Robotech War that the UEG admitted to licensing the dish to mercenary freelancer diners and special ops KP units, after it became known that a Tirolian battleship squadron that assaulted Mexico City was annihilated after seizing food supplies in the area. Later accounts tell of an Invid Hive being MELTED when South American guerillas delivered a 'special' using unsuspecting Invid collaborators as the delivery system.

CDU Commander: "Thus ends the briefing on the WMD known as Chili Con Carnage! Any other questions? No; Khyron, you're still delivering the package!"
Khyron: "I really hate this job..."
CDU Commander: "Thank you, Khyron, for volunteering to be our delivery system for future packages of Chili Con Carnage!"
Khyron: "Who do I hate more? Edwards and Kyle for ditching me with this shift ? Or Grell and Gerao?"

(At Gerao and Grell's quarters)

Gerao: "Grell...did you order some food?"
Grell: "No. Why?"
Gerao: "Somebody left something called Chilli Con Carnage...Sounds tasty."
Grell: "I think you'd better send that back!"
Gerao: "Why? Can't be all that bad..."

[taalismn]

[

I'm a Texan, and I APPROVE of this message.

Well....even tyrants have SOME standards, and one of the major considerations to take into account when deploying bean-based weaponry is wind direction.
Although the ingredients of the time were limited to the 'Aztec Fire' chili pepper and the 'Black Powder' bean, the decidedly limited technology of delivery systems made deployment of the early versions of '3c' chancy at best. Texans would have been suspicious of the Mexican Army suddenly pulling back several miles, even under the best of circumstances, while some Mexican government wagoneer stayed behind and approached them to make a delivery 'with the compliments of the Generalismo'. There were enough statesmen-soldiers among the Texans and the American volunteers who'd read classic Homer to smell a trojan horse....

[Alpha 11]

The Tank stops in front of the door.

Minmei: "Ok, first! Single round from coaxial gun."

#BLAM!# #Ding Dong#

Mother: "The doorbell? So soon?"

Minmei: (Opening the breach to bore sight the main gun.) "Now the delivery."

#BOOOOMMM!#

Minmei: (On loudspeaker) "ALL RIGHT YOU! THE NEXT ROUND ISN'T FOOD! STUFF $63.[sup]95[/sup] IN THE STICKY BALL PROVIDED AND THROW IT AT THE TANK! Oh and enjoy the meal."

Mother: "Oh dear Pumpkin, she's too smart for us, I hope you like Chow Main?"

Meanwhile, in the Monument Pizza Logan on final approach.

"CRAP!!! I FORGOT TO GET THE MONEY!!!"

Meanwhile, in the Monument Pizza Logan on final approach.

"CRAP!!! I FORGOT TO GET THE MONEY!!!"

Monument Pizza only takes online credit or debit card/electronic fund transfer transactions for delivery runs. Especially when CDU/CDC cordons are concerned.

The mother should be glad she didn't order the Chili Con Carnage.

Mother: "So; pumpkin, what should we try next? Hmmm? Mexican sounds like a good idea! Should we try for take out?"

(Outside the house)

CDU Officer: "Holy cr@p! All units, on the alert! Subjects are attempting a breach of the perimeter!"

CDU Officer: "Holy cr@p! All units, on the alert! Subjects are attempting a breach of the perimeter!"

CDU Officer: "Corporal Mather? You bought take-out?"
Cpl Mather: "Yes sir, I did. Why?"
CDU Officer: "Is that Chili Con Carnage I see? Have you opened it yet?"
Cpl: Mather: "...is the block still standing? Are we still alive?"
CDU Officer: "I'm not going to ask what you're doing with the stuff. Just give it here!"

CDU Commander: "Alright! This is it prepare for battle!"

BSS Commander: "Cue battle music!"

Where Kyle and Edwards are trying to hide, the motion tracker suddenly grows a speaker.

Edwards and Kyle: (Together) "OH CRAP!"

ASC Standard Battle Mood Muisic

Interesting song.

CDU Commander: "Alright! I need a volunteer to deliver the Chili Con Carnage to that house over where the subjects are attempting to breach the perimeter! Where's Edwards and Kyle? Still in the sewers? Khyron! Excellent of you to volunteer for this mission!"
Khyron: "I hate this job...when I get my hands on Gerao or Grell...I was one of the most feared warlords in the Zentraedi military...now I'm doing these crappy jobs..."

CDU Commander: "Alright! I need a volunteer to deliver the Chili Con Carnage to that house over where the subjects are attempting to breach the perimeter! Where's Edwards and Kyle? Still in the sewers? Khyron! Excellent of you to volunteer for this mission!"
Khyron: "I hate this job...when I get my hands on Gerao or Grell...I was one of the most feared warlords in the Zentraedi military...now I'm doing these crappy jobs..."

Meanwhile, Grell and Azonia sit back and watch the CCT Camera footage on the big screen while drinking.

Chili Con Carnage---aka 'Aztecs' Revenge', 'Bean Bomb'. the first bean-based dish ever to be granted WMD status. Early recipes were said to have been developed in Mexico during the reign of Santa "Take No Prisoners" Anna, but even HE dared not deploy it against those Texans. The recipes disappeared into history, but rumors of experiments using the advancing hotter peppers being bred circulated, including reports of atrocities in various corners of Mexico.
Chili Con Carnage roared unto the world stage after the Rain of Death when it ironically surfaced in the hands of Zentraedi Malcontents who used it against the nascent Southern Cross. An entire division of ASC starved to death after having their tastebuds flayed by CCC slipped into their rations. The particular potency of this incarnation of the dish has been traced to the development by Zentraedi farmers of the feared 'Dolza's Rage' chili pepper, said by some to be a crossbreed with Flower of Life. All known seeds and plantings of the Zentraedi chili pepper were subsequently seized by the UEDF and Chili Con Carnage was declared a controlled substance by the UEG(some wanted to ban it altogether), but again rumors tell of clandestine gardens growing the pepper and black market kitchens preparing the dish. It wasn't until after the Third Robotech War that the UEG admitted to licensing the dish to mercenary freelancer diners and special ops KP units, after it became known that a Tirolian battleship squadron that assaulted Mexico City was annihilated after seizing food supplies in the area. Later accounts tell of an Invid Hive being MELTED when South American guerillas delivered a 'special' using unsuspecting Invid collaborators as the delivery system.

Chili Con Carnage---aka 'Aztecs' Revenge', 'Bean Bomb'. the first bean-based dish ever to be granted WMD status. Early recipes were said to have been developed in Mexico during the reign of Santa "Take No Prisoners" Anna, but even HE dared not deploy it against those Texans. The recipes disappeared into history, but rumors of experiments using the advancing hotter peppers being bred circulated, including reports of atrocities in various corners of Mexico.
Chili Con Carnage roared unto the world stage after the Rain of Death when it ironically surfaced in the hands of Zentraedi Malcontents who used it against the nascent Southern Cross. An entire division of ASC starved to death after having their tastebuds flayed by CCC slipped into their rations. The particular potency of this incarnation of the dish has been traced to the development by Zentraedi farmers of the feared 'Dolza's Rage' chili pepper, said by some to be a crossbreed with Flower of Life. All known seeds and plantings of the Zentraedi chili pepper were subsequently seized by the UEDF and Chili Con Carnage was declared a controlled substance by the UEG(some wanted to ban it altogether), but again rumors tell of clandestine gardens growing the pepper and black market kitchens preparing the dish. It wasn't until after the Third Robotech War that the UEG admitted to licensing the dish to mercenary freelancer diners and special ops KP units, after it became known that a Tirolian battleship squadron that assaulted Mexico City was annihilated after seizing food supplies in the area. Later accounts tell of an Invid Hive being MELTED when South American guerillas delivered a 'special' using unsuspecting Invid collaborators as the delivery system.

I'm a Texan, and I APPROVE of this message.

Chili Con Carnage---aka 'Aztecs' Revenge', 'Bean Bomb'. the first bean-based dish ever to be granted WMD status. Early recipes were said to have been developed in Mexico during the reign of Santa "Take No Prisoners" Anna, but even HE dared not deploy it against those Texans. The recipes disappeared into history, but rumors of experiments using the advancing hotter peppers being bred circulated, including reports of atrocities in various corners of Mexico.
Chili Con Carnage roared unto the world stage after the Rain of Death when it ironically surfaced in the hands of Zentraedi Malcontents who used it against the nascent Southern Cross. An entire division of ASC starved to death after having their tastebuds flayed by CCC slipped into their rations. The particular potency of this incarnation of the dish has been traced to the development by Zentraedi farmers of the feared 'Dolza's Rage' chili pepper, said by some to be a crossbreed with Flower of Life. All known seeds and plantings of the Zentraedi chili pepper were subsequently seized by the UEDF and Chili Con Carnage was declared a controlled substance by the UEG(some wanted to ban it altogether), but again rumors tell of clandestine gardens growing the pepper and black market kitchens preparing the dish. It wasn't until after the Third Robotech War that the UEG admitted to licensing the dish to mercenary freelancer diners and special ops KP units, after it became known that a Tirolian battleship squadron that assaulted Mexico City was annihilated after seizing food supplies in the area. Later accounts tell of an Invid Hive being MELTED when South American guerillas delivered a 'special' using unsuspecting Invid collaborators as the delivery system.

CDU Commander: "Thus ends the briefing on the WMD known as Chili Con Carnage! Any other questions? No; Khyron, you're still delivering the package!"
Khyron: "I really hate this job..."
CDU Commander: "Thank you, Khyron, for volunteering to be our delivery system for future packages of Chili Con Carnage!"
Khyron: "Who do I hate more? Edwards and Kyle for ditching me with this shift ? Or Grell and Gerao?"

(At Gerao and Grell's quarters)

Gerao: "Grell...did you order some food?"
Grell: "No. Why?"
Gerao: "Somebody left something called Chilli Con Carnage...Sounds tasty."
Grell: "I think you'd better send that back!"
Gerao: "Why? Can't be all that bad..."

[

I'm a Texan, and I APPROVE of this message.

Well....even tyrants have SOME standards, and one of the major considerations to take into account when deploying bean-based weaponry is wind direction.
Although the ingredients of the time were limited to the 'Aztec Fire' chili pepper and the 'Black Powder' bean, the decidedly limited technology of delivery systems made deployment of the early versions of '3c' chancy at best. Texans would have been suspicious of the Mexican Army suddenly pulling back several miles, even under the best of circumstances, while some Mexican government wagoneer stayed behind and approached them to make a delivery 'with the compliments of the Generalismo'. There were enough statesmen-soldiers among the Texans and the American volunteers who'd read classic Homer to smell a trojan horse....

[SRoss]

The Tank stops in front of the door.

Minmei: "Ok, first! Single round from coaxial gun."

#BLAM!# #Ding Dong#

Mother: "The doorbell? So soon?"

Minmei: (Opening the breach to bore sight the main gun.) "Now the delivery."

#BOOOOMMM!#

Minmei: (On loudspeaker) "ALL RIGHT YOU! THE NEXT ROUND ISN'T FOOD! STUFF $63.[sup]95[/sup] IN THE STICKY BALL PROVIDED AND THROW IT AT THE TANK! Oh and enjoy the meal."

Mother: "Oh dear Pumpkin, she's too smart for us, I hope you like Chow Main?"

Meanwhile, in the Monument Pizza Logan on final approach.

"CRAP!!! I FORGOT TO GET THE MONEY!!!"

Kevin: "People forget she was Sensha-dō champion of her school four years running."

CDU Commander: "Alright! This is it prepare for battle!"

BSS Commander: "Cue battle music!"

Where Kyle and Edwards are trying to hide, the motion tracker suddenly grows a speaker.

Edwards and Kyle: (Together) "OH CRAP!"

ASC Standard Battle Mood Muisic

Interesting song.

Yes, it was rejected by a narrow margin to replace Danger Zone as the theme for the Tactical Air Force and Mars division.

[Arnie100]

BSS Commander: "Yeah, well, the Defense Force flyboys played the merry hell outta that damn 'Danger Zone' song that we just had to get our own. Excuse me (Picks up handset), You want the napalm to go where? In front of the house? Then drop some bunker busters into the sewers? Roger that! I'll see what the TAF can do!"

[taalismn]

Bunker Busters, THEN AP-bomblets, THEN napalm. Bunker busters open the sewer, bomblets sink into the sludge and get carried with the flow, and the hydro-shock from their explosions depth charges anything under the liquid. The napalm floats on top of the liquid and consumes available oxygen, turning the pipes into a tubular forced draft furnace(plus whatever methane that's accumulated gets set off).
The BSS are SERIOUS about their cook-offs and sanitation fires.

[SRoss]

Bunker Busters, THEN AP-bomblets, THEN napalm. Bunker busters open the sewer, bomblets sink into the sludge and get carried with the flow, and the hyro-shock from their explosions depth charges anything under the liquid. The naplm floats on top of the liquid and consumes available oxygen, turning the pipes into a tubular forced draft furnace(plus whatever methane that's accumulated gets set off).
The BSS are SERIOUS about their cook-offs and sanitation fires.

The Tactical Air Force hammered the sewer losing only four squadrons in the process. Edwards, Kyle and Wheatley float to the surface.

[Alpha 11]

The Tank stops in front of the door.

Minmei: "Ok, first! Single round from coaxial gun."

#BLAM!# #Ding Dong#

Mother: "The doorbell? So soon?"

Minmei: (Opening the breach to bore sight the main gun.) "Now the delivery."

#BOOOOMMM!#

Minmei: (On loudspeaker) "ALL RIGHT YOU! THE NEXT ROUND ISN'T FOOD! STUFF $63.[sup]95[/sup] IN THE STICKY BALL PROVIDED AND THROW IT AT THE TANK! Oh and enjoy the meal."

Mother: "Oh dear Pumpkin, she's too smart for us, I hope you like Chow Main?"

Meanwhile, in the Monument Pizza Logan on final approach.

"CRAP!!! I FORGOT TO GET THE MONEY!!!"

Kevin: "People forget she was Sensha-dō champion of her school four years running."

CDU Commander: "Alright! This is it prepare for battle!"

BSS Commander: "Cue battle music!"

Where Kyle and Edwards are trying to hide, the motion tracker suddenly grows a speaker.

Edwards and Kyle: (Together) "OH CRAP!"

ASC Standard Battle Mood Muisic

Interesting song.

Yes, it was rejected by a narrow margin to replace Danger Zone as the theme for the Tactical Air Force and Mars division.

BSS Commander: "Yeah, well, the Defense Force flyboys played the merry hell outta that damn 'Danger Zone' song that we just had to get our own. Excuse me (Picks up handset), You want the napalm to go where? In front of the house? Then drop some bunker busters into the sewers? Roger that! I'll see what the TAF can do!"

Bunker Busters, THEN AP-bomblets, THEN napalm. Bunker busters open the sewer, bomblets sink into the sludge and get carried with the flow, and the hyro-shock from their explosions depth charges anything under the liquid. The naplm floats on top of the liquid and consumes available oxygen, turning the pipes into a tubular forced draft furnace(plus whatever methane that's accumulated gets set off).
The BSS are SERIOUS about their cook-offs and sanitation fires.

Bunker Busters, THEN AP-bomblets, THEN napalm. Bunker busters open the sewer, bomblets sink into the sludge and get carried with the flow, and the hyro-shock from their explosions depth charges anything under the liquid. The naplm floats on top of the liquid and consumes available oxygen, turning the pipes into a tubular forced draft furnace(plus whatever methane that's accumulated gets set off).
The BSS are SERIOUS about their cook-offs and sanitation fires.

The Tactical Air Force hammered the sewer losing only four squadrons in the process. Edwards, Kyle and Wheatley float to the surface.

[Arnie100]

Edwards: (Being placed into a stretcher) "I hate you, Kyle..."
Kyle: (Also being put into stretcher) "This wasn't my fault!"
Whately: (Being put into straight jacket) "Well, back to my nice padded room!"
Edwards: "Where did HE come from!?"

[taalismn]

Edwards: (Being placed into a stretcher) "I hate you, Kyle..."
Kyle: (Also being put into stretcher) "This wasn't my fault!"
Whately: (Being put into straight jacket) "Well, back to my nice padded room!"
Edwards: "Where did HE come from!?"

Whately: "You should know that already, COUSIN."
Edwards: "What the hell are you talking about?!"
Whately: "Your name. Thomas RY'LEH Edwards."
Edwards: "You are SO messed up..."


Minmei: "I have this sudden urge to kill a Great Old One so hard his many times removed spawn will feel it...."

And somewhere, sleeping Cthulu gets a sudden nightmare.....

[Arnie100]

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

[taalismn]

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Cthulu: "...I really don't have clear recollections of what happened during that Ireland tour...."

[SRoss]

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Cthulu: "...I really don't have clear recollections of what happened during that Ireland tour...."

Cthulu: "Though apparently I spent several weeks performing with Michael Flatley."

[taalismn]

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Cthulu: "...I really don't have clear recollections of what happened during that Ireland tour...."

Cthulu: "Though apparently I spent several weeks performing with Michael Flatley."

This would explain the period of collective amnesia, hard drinking, and rampant dementia that afflicted the island at the time....

[SRoss]

Geez, you act like it's as bad as when Minmei and William Shatner performed together at the Grammies.

[taalismn]

Geez, you act like it's as bad as when Minmei and William Shatner performed together at the Grammies.

The Monument City Suicide Prevention Hotline STILL hasn't recovered from that one.....

[SRoss]

As Kyle Edwards and Whately are loaded into a medivac coptor, Khyron is loaded into another ambulance.

Khyron: "What the deuce!?! Why am I not being flown out with the others?"

Sammie: (In a nurse outfit) "Just you relax sweetums, we'll be at my place in no time."

Khyron's screams are silenced by the closing door.

[SRoss]

Why the Regess shouldn't Drink

No One Wants This Pet Back.

[Alpha 11]

Edwards: (Being placed into a stretcher) "I hate you, Kyle..."
Kyle: (Also being put into stretcher) "This wasn't my fault!"
Whately: (Being put into straight jacket) "Well, back to my nice padded room!"
Edwards: "Where did HE come from!?"

Edwards: (Being placed into a stretcher) "I hate you, Kyle..."
Kyle: (Also being put into stretcher) "This wasn't my fault!"
Whately: (Being put into straight jacket) "Well, back to my nice padded room!"
Edwards: "Where did HE come from!?"

Whately: "You should know that already, COUSIN."
Edwards: "What the hell are you talking about?!"
Whately: "Your name. Thomas RY'LEH Edwards."
Edwards: "You are SO messed up..."


Minmei: "I have this sudden urge to kill a Great Old One so hard his many times removed spawn will feel it...."

And somewhere, sleeping Cthulu gets a sudden nightmare.....

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Cthulu: "...I really don't have clear recollections of what happened during that Ireland tour...."

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Cthulu: "...I really don't have clear recollections of what happened during that Ireland tour...."

Cthulu: "Though apparently I spent several weeks performing with Michael Flatley."

Edwards: "That isn't my middle name, you idiot! Its Riley! Never mind...you're insane, anyways.
Whately: "Aw, thank you for the compliment, cousin!"
Edwards: "We are NOT cousins!!"

Cthulu: "...I really don't have clear recollections of what happened during that Ireland tour...."

Cthulu: "Though apparently I spent several weeks performing with Michael Flatley."

This would explain the period of collective amnesia, hard drinking, and rampant dementia that afflicted the island at the time....

Geez, you act like it's as bad as when Minmei and William Shatner performed together at the Grammies.

Shatner really needs to stick to acting. Minmei is ok.

Geez, you act like it's as bad as when Minmei and William Shatner performed together at the Grammies.

The Monument City Suicide Prevention Hotline STILL hasn't recovered from that one.....

As Kyle Edwards and Whately are loaded into a medivac coptor, Khyron is loaded into another ambulance.

Khyron: "What the deuce!?! Why am I not being flown out with the others?"

Sammie: (In a nurse outfit) "Just you relax sweetums, we'll be at my place in no time."

Khyron's screams are silenced by the closing door.