Mis-Credited, Mis-Stated Quotes, Rifts Style!!!

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Sat May 28, 2005 12:24 pm

cornholioprime wrote:"With the Information I can access, I can run things 900-1200 times better than any Human..."

-A.R.C.H.I.E. Three

Perfect!

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Sat May 28, 2005 12:50 pm

D-Bee restaurant slogan:

Rift-Earth's Makes a human a beautiful thing!

(Still needs work..)

cornholioprime · Sat May 28, 2005 12:51 pm

Toc Rat wrote:
cornholioprime wrote:"With the Information I can access, I can run things 900-1200 times better than any Human..."

-A.R.C.H.I.E. Three

Perfect!

"End of line."

Comrade Corsarius · Sat May 28, 2005 7:23 pm

Rimmerdal wrote:D-Bee restaurant slogan:

Rift-Earth's Makes a human a beautiful thing!

(Still needs work..)

So, do they use a certain cookbook called "to serve man"?

cornholioprime · Sat May 28, 2005 7:28 pm

"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."

-Erin "Santayana" Tarn

"History is always written wrong, and so always needs to be rewritten."

-Emperor Karl "Santayana" Prosek

"History is a pack of lies about events that never happened told by people who weren't there."

-Victor "Santayana" Lazlo

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Sun May 29, 2005 3:15 pm

Comrade Corsarius wrote:
Rimmerdal wrote:D-Bee restaurant slogan:

Rift-Earth's Makes a human a beautiful thing!

(Still needs work..)

So, do they use a certain cookbook called "to serve man"?

Whole new meaning to the Manwhich.. :eek:

a couple more..

A d-bee mom to her child.."Now quit playing with your food..."
***

A d-bee mom to her child.."Now quit talking with your food..."

***
A demon after eating a hippie "Whoa, must of been something that human...My hands are HUGE......"
***
Morbo: "Morbo demands an answer to the following question. If you saw
a delicious candy in the hands of a small child. Would you
seize and consume it?"

Prozek: "Question is vague. You don't say what kind of candy and
whether anyone is watching. In anyway I certainly wouldn't
harm the child."
***
Borg #1: "I heard that in one single night you drank a whole keg, streaked across
campus, and crammed fifty-eight humans into a phone booth."
Borg #2: "Yeah, well, a lot of 'em were children...."
***
-Prozek on women:
There's only one surefire way back into a woman's heart and parts beyond. I speak, of course, of Karaoke.
***
-Human men are real men! (CS enlistment slogan)
***
Hippie: "The point is, you shouldn't eat things that feel pain." *BONK!* "Ow!"
D-Bee feeling generous: "Okay, we won't eat you!"

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Mon May 30, 2005 2:47 am

"By your command"
Coalition Skelebot 421

"The Coalition will compensate you if he doesn't survive"
Col. Lyboc speaking to Jobba Fett, bounty hunter

"I'm a medic, we don't save lives, we just make you more comfertable while you die."
Coalition Combat Medic

"Who? Us?"
Commander, 101st Airborne, Coalition Army, after being told his unit would be dropped on Tolkeen...first.

"But I already believe drill sgt.!"
Coalition Deadboy recruit, after being told to remove his helmet while in the teear gas chamber in order to prove that his protective equipment will save his life on the battle field

cornholioprime · Mon May 30, 2005 4:46 am

"I want that Magus Restroom so sanitary and squared-away that Erin Tarn herself would be proud to go in and take a dump. "

-Arcane Drill Sergeant Hartman, addressing a new batch of Battle Magus hopefuls in their first week at Mystic Boot Camp

Comrade Corsarius · Mon May 30, 2005 5:52 am

Juicer with MEV: I'll have five whole fried chickens,
Crazy with Power by association: Some dry white toast
Mind Melter: And a psi-coke.

Adventurers giving orders at a kingsdale bar 'n' grill

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 1:12 am

I am Coalition Sergeant Hartman, your senior Drill Instructor.
From now on, you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be sir.
Do you Nxla understand that?
--Sir, Yes Sir!
Bull****, I can't hear you. Sound off like ya got a boom-gun!
--SIR, YES SIR!
If you Splugorth leave my camp, if you survive survive recruit training, you will be a weapon.
You will be a minister of death praying for war.
But until that day you are aliens.
You are the lowest form of life on Earth.
You are not even magic using wizards.
You are nothing but unorganized grabastic pieces of d-bee sh*t.
Because I am hard you will not like me.
But the more you hate me the more you will learn.
I am hard but I am fair.
There is no social bigotry here.
I do not look down on burb-towners, organ leggers, d-bee lovers, or gamers.
Here you are all equally worthless.
And my orders are to weed out all non-hackers who do not pack the gear to serve my beloved Proseks.
Do you Nxla understand that?

In Africa:
Lord Coake: "Do you expect me to talk?"
Death: "No, Lord Coake, I expect you to die!"

"You still don't understand, Erin, you were never a girl in this place."

Emperor Prosek: "Lord Coake never told you the truth, Erin."
Erin Tarn: "He told me enough!"
Emperor Prosek: "No, Erin, I am your father!"
Erin Tarn: "No, that's impossible!"

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 1:18 am

Comrade Corsarius wrote:You know, these are supposed to be quotes, not songs...

Otherwise someone is going to dredge up "I am the very model of a coalition general" from the old Rifts: The Musical thread.

I have done quite a bit of searching, and cannot locate that. Is there any chance you can post a link to it?

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 1:18 am

RainOfSteel wrote:Emperor Prosek: "Lord Coake never told you the truth, Erin."
Erin Tarn: "He told me enough!"
Emperor Prosek: "No, Erin, I am your father!"
Erin Tarn: "No, that's impossible!"

(clap clap)

Good one!

cornholioprime · Wed Jun 01, 2005 2:01 am

"Strong am I in the Forge... *cough* ......but not that strong."

-Yho-Dah, Cosmo-Knight, on his deathbed

Comrade Corsarius · Wed Jun 01, 2005 3:48 am

RainOfSteel wrote:
Comrade Corsarius wrote:You know, these are supposed to be quotes, not songs...

Otherwise someone is going to dredge up "I am the very model of a coalition general" from the old Rifts: The Musical thread.

I have done quite a bit of searching, and cannot locate that. Is there any chance you can post a link to it?

I'll have a look, but it was posted about a year or so ago under the name of 'rifts the musical'. I THINK Zerebus had a hand in it somewhere.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 1:05 pm

Comrade Corsarius wrote:You know, these are supposed to be quotes, not songs...

Gee last I checked a quote is any reference to material that does not belong to you. Most often published.

In either case music with lyrics still count because you know what they do with the lyrics?? Yeah thats right they publish.

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 2:09 pm

Need labour? You Concubine getting to old?

go to....

SLAVES "R" US!

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 3:33 pm

Illithid13 wrote:Shop smart, shop Splynn-mart

Hey Triax Tech!! You waited too long

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 11:49 pm

General Underhill: "A grown man knows the world he lives in. For the moment, that world is the Coalition States."

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 12:01 am

Unknown Psychic: "First came the darkness, then came the Coalition."

(CS Captain interrogates captured Cyber Knight in a cell below Chi-Town.)
Cyber Knight: "When was the last time you remember doing something on your own?"
CS Captain: "What do you mean?"
Cyber Knight: "I just mean doing what you want. Freedom. When was the last time you remember living it? And I'm not talking about some distant, half-forgotten childhood memory, I mean like yesterday. Last week. Can you come up with a single memory? You can't, can you? You know something, I don't think freedom even... exists... in this place. 'Cause I've been around for years, and years, and years, and the tyranny never ends here."

Blight · Unread post by **Blight** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 12:25 am

RainOfSteel wrote:Unknown Psychic: "First came the darkness, then came the Coalition."

(CS Captain interrogates captured Cyber Knight in a cell below Chi-Town.)
Cyber Knight: "When was the last time you remember doing something on your own?"
CS Captain: "What do you mean?"
Cyber Knight: "I just mean doing what you want. Freedom. When was the last time you remember living it? And I'm not talking about some distant, half-forgotten childhood memory, I mean like yesterday. Last week. Can you come up with a single memory? You can't, can you? You know something, I don't think freedom even... exists... in this place. 'Cause I've been around for years, and years, and years, and the tyranny never ends here."

Ok i give were have i heard this

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 12:42 am

Hapless CS Grunt #1: "It's a - it's a - it's a - it's a - it's a - it's a..."
Hapless CS Grust #2: "No no no no no no. 'Cuz if it was a Mechanoids Mothership, the alarms would go off 'cuz all these planets have Mothership detectors, right?"

CS Burb Town Patrol Grunt: Are you classified as human?
Master Vampire Hiding Behind Door: Negative, I am a meat popsicle.

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 12:58 am

Col. Lyboc: Let's go back up to my office and talk about this like two reasonable beings.

Col. Lyboc: Laugh while you can, d-bee boy.

Lord Dunscon: May I pass along my congratulations for your great interdimensional breakthrough. I am sure, in the miserable annals of the Earth, you will be duly enshrined.

Karl Prosek: Where are we going?
Dead Boys: Tolkeen!
Karl Prosek: When?
Dead Boys: Real soon!

Erin Tarn: Lord Coake, you forgot your sword.
Lord Coake: Why don't you hold onto it for a while.
Erin Tarn: Any time.

CS Comm. Officer: General Underhill, the Emperor wants to know is everything ok with the alien Mechanoids craft, or should we just go ahead and destroy Tolkeen?
General Underhill: Tell him yes on one and no on two.
CS Comm. Officer: Which one was yes, go ahead and destroy Tolkeen . . . or number 2?

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 1:11 am

Unknown Hero in bad Trouble: Sh*t! I hate not being the bad guys!

Elemental Intelligence living in North America: They are an army unlike any other... crusading across North American toward a place called Tolkeen, their promised land - an expanse of terrirtory to wipe clean of a taint. Coalition Dead Bodys, they're called. And if they cannot convert you, they will kill you. Leading them, the Emperor Prosek. He alone has made a pilgrimage to the gates of Lonestar ... and returned a different being. Stronger. Stranger. Half alive and half ... something else. If we are to survive, a new balance must be found. In normal times, evil would be fought by good. But in times like these, well, it should be fought by another kind of evil.

Col. Lyboc: I've done... unbelievable things... in the name of a faith that was never my own.

cornholioprime · Thu Jun 02, 2005 1:16 am

"Listen! And understand!

That Repo-Bot is out there.

It can't be bargained with!

It can't be reasoned with!

It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear.

And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead!

...Or at least, 'til you've made your payments...."

-Kyle Reese, ex-Naruni Sales Rep, on Repo-Bots

cornholioprime · Thu Jun 02, 2005 1:28 am

And in the same vein:

"Sara Connor??

My name's Reese, ex-Naruni Sales Rep #2177099.

I've been assigned to protect you.

You've been targeted for Repossession."

-Kyle Reese, former Naruni Sales Rep, now Hartigal Combine Employee, addressing his newest potential Client

Comrade Corsarius · Thu Jun 02, 2005 3:57 am

Blight wrote:
RainOfSteel wrote:Unknown Psychic: "First came the darkness, then came the Coalition."

(CS Captain interrogates captured Cyber Knight in a cell below Chi-Town.)
Cyber Knight: "When was the last time you remember doing something on your own?"
CS Captain: "What do you mean?"
Cyber Knight: "I just mean doing what you want. Freedom. When was the last time you remember living it? And I'm not talking about some distant, half-forgotten childhood memory, I mean like yesterday. Last week. Can you come up with a single memory? You can't, can you? You know something, I don't think freedom even... exists... in this place. 'Cause I've been around for years, and years, and years, and the tyranny never ends here."

Ok i give were have i heard this

Dark City... an ultra-cool movie filmed right here in Australia! I knew people who were in it!!

CyCo · Unread post by **CyCo** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 9:55 am

Comrade Corsarius wrote:
Blight wrote:
RainOfSteel wrote:Unknown Psychic: "First came the darkness, then came the Coalition."

(CS Captain interrogates captured Cyber Knight in a cell below Chi-Town.)
Cyber Knight: "When was the last time you remember doing something on your own?"
CS Captain: "What do you mean?"
Cyber Knight: "I just mean doing what you want. Freedom. When was the last time you remember living it? And I'm not talking about some distant, half-forgotten childhood memory, I mean like yesterday. Last week. Can you come up with a single memory? You can't, can you? You know something, I don't think freedom even... exists... in this place. 'Cause I've been around for years, and years, and years, and the tyranny never ends here."

Ok i give were have i heard this :?

Dark City... an ultra-cool movie filmed right here in Australia! I knew people who were in it!!

And I was ment to work on it! I had lined up a job to be one of the assistant modellers with 2D/3D Inc, which is a small special fx company that opperated out of Linden near the Blue Mountains. But we lost contact with each other. At the time they didn't know what the project was going to be. All Loius was told was that it was going to be a dark, gritty, possibly post apocalyptic project. He didn't even know if it was going to be a tv ad, tv series, movie, telemovie or what. Then when we went to see Dark City, I kept saying that I bet this was the movie. And when it was finished, I waited until the credits got to the sfx crew. And there it was, 2D3D inc.

I missed my chance....

:(

Blight · Unread post by **Blight** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 11:38 am

Laugh it up fur ball.
CS psi-stalker to dog-boy after doing somthing stupid.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 5:04 pm

What no one with:

Look at the size of that thing.

There just impacting on the surface.

I don't care what it smells like you big hairy oaf get in there.

You came in that thing? Your braver than I thought.

It's the size of a small moon.

Let go...

Use the force.

Your my only hope.

My family is strong in the (place Rifts stuff here).

?? OK enough Star Wars. How about trying to make it tough?

Not Rifts but how many people can say they know where Klatu Verrata Nicto comes from and how many more correct people and say that it is supposed to start with Gort?

Comrade Corsarius · Thu Jun 02, 2005 5:15 pm

Zer0 Kay wrote:Not Rifts but how many people can say they know where Klatu Verrata Nicto comes from and how many more correct people and say that it is supposed to start with Gort?

I have it at home on DVD
The Day The Earth Stood Still... It had to be told to Gort else he destroy the world.

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 5:16 pm

Armies of Darkness/Evil Dead series...can't place what movie is thhough...but that inspires one...

If Tenticals could talk...

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:51 pm

"The mighty Lord Duncson asks why he must pay the sum of 50,000 credits." pause for translation
"Because he's holding a fusion block!"
Imp translator to Lord Duncson

"There is no subsitute for heavy armor"
Sgt. Major Casey, Free Quebec Army, Glitter Boy pilot

"I'm a Cyber-Knight, not a priest"
Sir Edmund of Monte Cristo

glitterboy2098 · Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:29 am

Good Morning Hagan
A.R.C.H.I.E.-3

"what are you?"
"i'm a Dogboy. Half man, half dog. i'm my own best freind."

"if theres a bright center to the megaverse, your on the planet that is farthest from."
Local talking to a lost Shifter.

"with great power comes great responsibility"
Cyber-knight mentor to apprentice.

GaredBattlespike · Fri Jun 03, 2005 12:40 pm

A Blue Oyster Cult Song Quotes & Misquotes
Can you identify the songs and albums?
1)"I...Came here willingly, and I will go down vailiantly. To give it all we have to give, to die as we have lived..." Unknown CyberKnight in the SoT
2) "I am the Black Blade, forged a million, billion years ago. My cosmic song goes on for eternity. Carving out desitiny, bringing in the Lords of Chaos,calling up the Beasts of Hades, sucking out the souls of the Heroes,laying waste to Knights and Ladies. My 'Master' is my slave! Hahahahahaha...." Diabolic RuneWeapon boasting to it's buyer at Splynn
3)"No mortal was meant to know such wonder, one look in the mirror told me so..." Secondary Vampire
4) "You see me now, a veteran of a thousand psychic wars. My energy is spent at last and my armor is destroyed. I have used up all my weapons and I'm helpless and bereaved: wounds are what I'm made of..."
Mercenary Mind Melter at the end of the Sot
5)"As their Leader swoops from the clouds, She sticks him with a Psi-Sword and She throws Him down..." Song about a Lady CyberKnight vs a group of high-tech bandits
6)"History shows again and again how Nature points out folly of Men..."
exerpt from one of Erin Tarn's notebooks

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 12:55 pm

Plato: I am to charge you with a holy crusade.
Hapless Cyberdoc: For the record, I work in a cyber clinic.
Plato: Lord Coake was a humble man. Look what he accomplished. And no one's even asking you to found the Cyber Knights. All you have to do is go to New Jersey, and visit a small megalith on a very important day.
Hapless Cyberdoc: New Jersey? That doesn't sound like much of a crusade.
Plato: Aside from the fine print, that's it.
Hapless Cyberdoc: What's the fine print?
Plato: [mumbles] Stopacoupleofdemonsfromdestroyingthemegalithandthusnegatingallexistence.
Hapless Cyberdoc: Wait, wait, wait. Repeat that.
Plato: Stop a couple of demons from destroying the megalith and thus negating all existence. I hate when people need it spelled out for them.

Spirit of Light: Leave it to the Coalition to Destroy Existence.

RainOfSteel · Unread post by **RainOfSteel** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 1:11 pm

Lord Coake: Never give up. Never surrender.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:53 pm

Rimmerdal wrote:Armies of Darkness/Evil Dead series...can't place what movie is thhough...but that inspires one...

If Tenticals could talk...

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:54 pm

Comrade Corsarius wrote:
Zer0 Kay wrote:Not Rifts but how many people can say they know where Klatu Verrata Nicto comes from and how many more correct people and say that it is supposed to start with Gort?

I have it at home on DVD
The Day The Earth Stood Still... It had to be told to Gort else he destroy the world.

Age and culture. Always a good mix. So do you have Metropolis too? The old silent film, as in the First Sci-Fi movie ever.

Necrite · Unread post by **Necrite** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:24 pm

I really hope this one hasn't been done...

In P.A. 105
War was beginning.

King Creed: What happen ?
Malik Savant: Somebody set up us the bomb.
Kueda the Grey: We get signal.
Creed: What !
Kueda: Main screen turn on.
Creed: It's you !!
Emperor Prosek: How are you gentlemen !!
Prosek: All your base are belong to us.
Prosek: You are on the way to destruction.
Creed: What you say !!
Prosek: You have no chance to survive make your time.
Prosek: Ha Ha Ha Ha ....
Kueda: Captain !!*
Creed: Take off every 'Juggernaut'!!
Creed: You know what you doing.
Creed: Move 'Juggernaut'.
Creed: For great justice.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:56 pm

Show me Heaven, show me Hell,
show me what lies beyond.

I will love you like none other
for I have died a thousand tiny deaths
and every time I died I thought of you ~

I love you. I've tasted Hell.
I hate you. I've seen Heaven.
I know you. I've found myself.

Please don't fear me ~
I know your pain, your sorrow ~
I know your dreams and nightmares ~
I know you ~
I am the Goddess that you pray to . . .

I traded a life of human riches
for a life of cosmic resplendence.

I am Aurora ~ I am Isis ~
I am Gaia ~ I am Cerridwen ~
I am yours and I will cry for you.

Just a few quotes from a cool comic book character. Couldn't really think of any mortal that could "step" into these.

glitterboy2098 · Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:27 pm

"you D-Bee Scum"
-Nameless CS Officer...

cornholioprime · Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:10 pm

glitterboy2098 wrote:"you D-Bee Scum"
-Nameless CS Officer...

That was "Star (Child) Wars: Return of the Cyber-Knights, no? Where the (Tolkeen) Rebellion got caught by the Garrison in the Shield Generator??

I think that the Actor got it on the first take.......

cornholioprime · Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:11 pm

Necrite wrote:I really hope this one hasn't been done...

In P.A. 105
War was beginning.

King Creed: What happen ?
Malik Savant: Somebody set up us the bomb.
Kueda the Grey: We get signal.
Creed: What !
Kueda: Main screen turn on.
Creed: It's you !!
Emperor Prosek: How are you gentlemen !!
Prosek: All your base are belong to us.
Prosek: You are on the way to destruction.
Creed: What you say !!
Prosek: You have no chance to survive make your time.
Prosek: Ha Ha Ha Ha ....
Kueda: Captain !!*
Creed: Take off every 'Juggernaut'!!
Creed: You know what you doing.
Creed: Move 'Juggernaut'.
Creed: For great justice.

Yeah. I think that it was done on the first page/day.

And I laughed me arse off, too.......

cornholioprime · Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:26 pm

"Give me the Map now and you may at least walk out of here on Human Feet."

-Alistair Dunscon, in a particularly 'generous' mood, addressing a group of cornered Adventurers

(anyone wanna tell me where this is from??)

Braden Campbell · Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:46 pm

"We have nothing to fear, but fear itself. And, of course, dragons. And shape-changers. And Free Quebec's renegade nuclear weapons program. And the Xiticix."

- EKP
(Emperor Karl Prosek)

Braden Campbell · Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:49 pm

"Vive Quebec. Vive Quebec Libre!"

- General Charles DeGaule

Seriously.

Blight · Unread post by **Blight** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:56 pm

cornholioprime wrote:"Give me the Map now and you may at least walk out of here on Human Feet."

-Alistair Dunscon, in a particularly 'generous' mood, addressing a group of cornered Adventurers

(anyone wanna tell me where this is from??)

Willow

cornholioprime · Sat Jun 04, 2005 12:46 am

Blight wrote:
cornholioprime wrote:"Give me the Map now and you may at least walk out of here on Human Feet."

-Alistair Dunscon, in a particularly 'generous' mood, addressing a group of cornered Adventurers

(anyone wanna tell me where this is from??)

Willow

Nope.

(Yay!! I've stumped someone!!)

MrTwist · Unread post by **MrTwist** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:12 am

cornholioprime wrote:"Give me the Map now and you may at least walk out of here on Human Feet."

-Alistair Dunscon, in a particularly 'generous' mood, addressing a group of cornered Adventurers

(anyone wanna tell me where this is from??)

Time Bandits?

cornholioprime · Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:14 am

MrTwist wrote:
cornholioprime wrote:"Give me the Map now and you may at least walk out of here on Human Feet."

-Alistair Dunscon, in a particularly 'generous' mood, addressing a group of cornered Adventurers

(anyone wanna tell me where this is from??)

Time Bandits?

Get Down, MrTwist!!!

David Warner, aka Evil himself!!!!!