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There's actually a fine art to orbital bungee jumping...not burning up on the way down, not snapping the line at the end, and not having ablated so much that you suffocate on the bounce...

LOL Cute! Is that a new zentraedi recon method?

Aramanthus wrote:LOL Cute! Is that a new zentraedi recon method?

"Can't quite make out what the micronians are doing! Bring me closer! Closer! ...closer..."
*KWANG*
"...**too close**..."

taalismn wrote:

Aramanthus wrote:LOL Cute! Is that a new zentraedi recon method?

"Can't quite make out what the micronians are doing! Bring me closer! Closer! ...closer..."
*KWANG*
"...**too close**..."

"Hello? Macross Contracting? I have what looks the giant impression of somebody's FACE punched into my roof!"

LOL Now that is a great way for them to carry out their recon. I really think that needs to be the method retconned into the series. (MOstly for the laughs it would recieve from the masses watching the poor idiot zentraedi who happily volunteers to bungee recon duty from orbit. Good thing Clones"RUS will happily replace all loses for a certain profit levels.

taalismn wrote:"Hello? Macross Contracting? I have what looks the giant impression of somebody's FACE punched into my roof!"

Kyle: "What's the matter with you guys! MInmei has to go on stage in ten minutes, and you're STILL not ready?!"
Stagehand: "But, sir! We've been hearing things backstage! Seeing movement where movement shouldn't be! The boys and girls are starting to get freaked...Some say...it's the .."
Kyle: "ARGH! THAT again! Enough of that nonsense! I can't believe you people! You're supposed to be professionals! GET WITH THE PROGRAM, YOU IDIOTS!!!"
(above Lynn Kyle a heavy spotlight rocks in its mountings...and a dark figure looks down, unseen...)
'Soon...soon, my lady, you will be safely away from these cads...and I shall teach you...teach you how to unlock your TRUE potential!"

LOL Very funny! I hope we get some more info on that one. I'd love to know who is doing what.

Dairugger XV wrote:

taalismn wrote:Kyle: "What's the matter with you guys! MInmei has to go on stage in ten minutes, and you're STILL not ready?!"
Stagehand: "But, sir! We've been hearing things backstage! Seeing movement where movement shouldn't be! The boys and girls are starting to get freaked...Some say...it's the .."
Kyle: "ARGH! THAT again! Enough of that nonsense! I can't believe you people! You're supposed to be professionals! GET WITH THE PROGRAM, YOU IDIOTS!!!"
(above Lynn Kyle a heavy spotlight rocks in its mountings...and a dark figure looks down, unseen...)
'Soon...soon, my lady, you will be safely away from these cads...and I shall teach you...teach you how to unlock your TRUE potential!"

Minmei: Are you sure I can't wear something more than this.
Producer: I'm sure. Now show these nice men how much you love them.
Minmei: But what about the rest of the movie?
Producer: Oh we'll get to that and a whole lot more.

"Okay,,,that was...different..."
"It was either the Unknown Comic doing an incredible Minmei impersonation...or one helluva makeup disaster..."
"Mommy...why was that lady wearing a paperbag over her head?"

taalismn wrote:

Dairugger XV wrote:

taalismn wrote:Kyle: "What's the matter with you guys! MInmei has to go on stage in ten minutes, and you're STILL not ready?!"
Stagehand: "But, sir! We've been hearing things backstage! Seeing movement where movement shouldn't be! The boys and girls are starting to get freaked...Some say...it's the .."
Kyle: "ARGH! THAT again! Enough of that nonsense! I can't believe you people! You're supposed to be professionals! GET WITH THE PROGRAM, YOU IDIOTS!!!"
(above Lynn Kyle a heavy spotlight rocks in its mountings...and a dark figure looks down, unseen...)
'Soon...soon, my lady, you will be safely away from these cads...and I shall teach you...teach you how to unlock your TRUE potential!"

Minmei: Are you sure I can't wear something more than this.
Producer: I'm sure. Now show these nice men how much you love them.
Minmei: But what about the rest of the movie?
Producer: Oh we'll get to that and a whole lot more.

"Okay,,,that was...different..."
"It was either the Unknown Comic doing an incredible Minmei impersonation...or one helluva makeup disaster..."
"Mommy...why was that lady wearing a paperbag over her head?"

*a Lt. Hunter walks up to the woman wearing the bag, whispering to her while taking her arm. Lt. hunter hails a cab and rides with the woman to the base and delivers her to the captain.*

CG:"Commander Hays take off that bag, You know she could sue you for liable."
CH:"That little $%^&*$% needs some ego pruning"
CG:*shaking head*"you're a bit young to understand marketing before the war. There is a saying that any publicity is good publicity. If you really want to get at her you need to do it in private and in ways that can't be traced back to you."
CH:"I didn't know you disliked her sir."
CG:"it not that I dislike her, it's just that I need You. And if you are in the brig, who will keep of those hot shots in line, Sammy?"*gives lisa a stair with a twinkle in it.*
CH: "what do you suggest sir?"
CG: "I can't make any recommendations, But in my youth I pulled a few 'pranks'. Nair in her shampoo, or itching powder in her deodorant. Try the guys down in life support, they should know some good ones.'
*Gloval leans forward*
"Here is the most important thing,"
"Don't get caught doing it"
CH: *thinks it over and salutes*
CG: "dismissed"

ROFLMAO!!! Those were great! Please keep them coming!

SDF-1 Life Support:
The techs are looking at the ventilation controls for the main housing bays(aka Macross City)
Tech1: (chortling) "What shall it be today, my friend? 'Sudden Blizzard'? 'Thunderstorm'? or ....'TORNADO'...?"

taalismn wrote:SDF-1 Life Support:
The techs are looking at the ventilation controls for the main housing bays(aka Macross City)
Tech1: (chortling) "What shall it be today, my friend? 'Sudden Blizzard'? 'Thunderstorm'? or ....'TORNADO'...?"

taalismn wrote:SDF-1 Life Support:
The techs are looking at the ventilation controls for the main housing bays(aka Macross City)
Tech1: (chortling) "What shall it be today, my friend? 'Sudden Blizzard'? 'Thunderstorm'? or .... 'TORNADO'...?"

Reminds me of the Training room in the movie Zoom.
All they would need is some skunks.

"Hot hail, milord."
"HOt hail it is indeed!"
"Will you idiots quit cackling and get us a light shower? There was a big Minmei concert last night, and Municipal Maintenance wants some water on the streets to help with cleanup!"
"-yessir!"

Max: "Next we have Arial, princess of the Invid"
*Arial T-ports onto stage and walks about, there is a silence from the audience*
Dana: "Now that is the sort of swimsuit I was afraid I'd have to wear."
Maia: "Actually Dana, I think that is a, what do you call it, 'wardrobe malfunction'"
Max: "Yes folks that is what appears to have happened, for you viewers at home who can't see, it looks like portions of Arial's once dowdy one-piece got left behind when she came on stage."
*max looks about*
Max: "I will leave the rest of the announcing to my Loving Wife, Mirria."
*max is gone in the next shot of the judges, Mirria in a Bikini showing off her still beautiful form, is now there hold the mic.*

"And next up, JANICE EM!"
"You know. technically she's naked...anything she's wearing is just a holographic projection.."
Louie: (eyes glazed over) "...yeah....I know...."

Dairugger XV wrote:Max: Welcome to the Robotech Swimsuit show. I'm here with my daughters Dana and Maia, to comment on the event.
Maia: Ya know when they first asked me to be a part of this, I was afraid they'd be making me wear some barely there swimsuit.
Dana: The flight suit they had you wearing in the Shadow Chronicles didn't exactly leave much to the imagination either.
Max: ...And here's the first showcase of the night- AUGH! MY EYES!
Exedore and the Robotech Masters walk onto the runway wearing nothing but speedos and a smile.
Dana: Where's that glass of acid when I need it.
Maia: I still have that fork from dinner, if you want to use it to gouge out your eyes. After, I'm done gouging out my own.

drewkitty ~..~ wrote:Max: "Next we have Arial, princess of the Invid"
*Arial T-ports onto stage and walks about, there is a silence from the audience*
Dana: "Now that is the sort of swimsuit I was afraid I'd have to wear."
Maia: "Actually Dana, I think that is a, what do you call it, 'wardrobe malfunction'"
Max: "Yes folks that is what appears to have happened, for you viewers at home who can't see, it looks like portions of Arial's once dowdy one-piece got left behind when she came on stage."
*max looks about*
Max: "I will leave the rest of the announcing to my Loving Wife, Mirria."
*max is gone in the next shot of the judges, Mirria in a Bikini showing off her still beautiful form, is now there hold the mic.*

taalismn wrote:"And next up, JANICE EM!"
"You know. technically she's naked...anything she's wearing is just a holographic projection.."
Louie: (eyes glazed over) "...yeah....I know...."

"Psst...Boss? Miss Em can't come out...malfunction..."
"Wardrobe malfunction?"
"No, malfunction..she froze..."
"Crowd got to her? Got cold feet?"
"I mean she FROZE...she's locked up.. can't move....stiff as a...well, a locked-up android.."
"You tried a litte WD40?"
"Yeah, and squirt it WHERE? I'm a stagehand and gaffer, not a mecha mechanic!"
"Oh dear...(turns to microphone) Excuse me, is there cyberneticist in the house?"

taalismn wrote:"Psst...Boss? Miss Em can't come out...malfunction..."
"Wardrobe malfunction?"
"No, malfunction..she froze..."
"Crowd got to her? Got cold feet?"
"I mean she FROZE...she's locked up.. can't move.... stiff as a...well, a locked-up android.."
"You tried a little WD40?"
"Yeah, and squirt it WHERE? I'm a stagehand and gaffer, not a mecha mechanic!"
"Oh dear...(turns to microphone) Excuse me, is there cyberneticist in the house?"

*just before Louie gets back there, you see a tech pressing the reboot button*
"Don't you just hate these models that use PC tech, Should of used someone from Apple to design it."

"And today, fellow Tirolian citizens, in celebration of our twentieth year of space travel to Earth, have a Cupecake-in-a-Drink. It's Festive, It's Tasty, It's Convenient, and It's Mandatory! Cupecake-jn-a-Drink! Another Fine Food Product Brought to you by your Caring Robotech Masters! Drink, be Happy, and Be Obedient!"
"Last year it was Zaphrberry Pie-jn-a-Drink!"
"You remember Roast Bovineform-in-a-Drink?"
"Vaguely, but I remember Rashaberry Salad-in-a-Drink."

taalismn wrote:"Psst...Boss? Miss Em can't come out...malfunction..."
"Wardrobe malfunction?"
"No, malfunction..she froze..."
"Crowd got to her? Got cold feet?"
"I mean she FROZE...she's locked up.. can't move....stiff as a...well, a locked-up android.."
"You tried a litte WD40?"
"Yeah, and squirt it WHERE? I'm a stagehand and gaffer, not a mecha mechanic!"
"Oh dear...(turns to microphone) Excuse me, is there cyberneticist in the house?"

drewkitty ~..~ wrote:

taalismn wrote:"Psst...Boss? Miss Em can't come out...malfunction..."
"Wardrobe malfunction?"
"No, malfunction..she froze..."
"Crowd got to her? Got cold feet?"
"I mean she FROZE...she's locked up.. can't move.... stiff as a...well, a locked-up android.."
"You tried a little WD40?"
"Yeah, and squirt it WHERE? I'm a stagehand and gaffer, not a mecha mechanic!"
"Oh dear...(turns to microphone) Excuse me, is there cyberneticist in the house?"

*just before Louie gets back there, you see a tech pressing the reboot button*
"Don't you just hate these models that use PC tech, Should of used someone from Apple to design it."

taalismn wrote:"And today, fellow Tirolian citizens, in celebration of our twentieth year of space travel to Earth, have a Cupecake-in-a-Drink. It's Festive, It's Tasty, It's Convenient, and It's Mandatory! Cupecake-jn-a-Drink! Another Fine Food Product Brought to you by your Caring Robotech Masters! Drink, be Happy, and Be Obedient!"
"Last year it was Zaphrberry Pie-jn-a-Drink!"
"You remember Roast Bovineform-in-a-Drink?"
"Vaguely, but I remember Rashaberry Salad-in-a-Drink."

(Shortly after Graduation Day, Southern Cross Military Academy)
Bowie: "Why you looking so glum, Dana? You got a great assignment, everything's gong fine, but you look bummed out! Bored?"
Dana: "Sorta...I just have this FEELING that...well, we're missing something...Something terrible, but important...but it's just not happening..."
Bowie: "I dunno...terrible AND important sound like something we're better off avoiding, if you ask me..."
Dana: "Oh well....I wonder if we're know what it was..."

(Meanwhile, somewhere off beyond the Lesser Magellenic Cloud...)
Robotech Master: "WHATTAYA MEAN, 'WE'RE -LOST-'?!!"

ROFLMAO!!! Those were great! What about some more recon bungee jumping zentraedi who happen to land on or help eliminate Edwards and his cronies.

Thanks alot, Dairugger XV. You made me squirt freaking tea out of my nose with the Exedore one.

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

Dairugger XV wrote:Curses and I had those spy cameras turned off. Now I missed the tea squirting.

Pretty spectacular...Unfortunately Rathorc was at his bridge station when he did the spit take...
You'd think on a multi-billion dollar space battlefortress, they'd waterproof the control consoles...
I mean...we have cup holders but not water sealing?
Didn't they learn ANYTHING from the Petit Cola Syndrome aboard the original SDF-1?
Pardon me while I reset the circuit breakers and replace some fuzes....
It may take the ventilators a minute or two to vent all the smoke...
Don't worry, Rathorc's unharmed, but the ensign next to him may need skin grafts and psych-con...

taalismn wrote:(Shortly after Graduation Day, Southern Cross Military Academy)
Bowie: "Why you looking so glum, Dana? You got a great assignment, everything's gong fine, but you look bummed out! Bored?"
Dana: "Sorta...I just have this FEELING that...well, we're missing something...Something terrible, but important...but it's just not happening..."
Bowie: "I dunno...terrible AND important sound like something we're better off avoiding, if you ask me..."
Dana: "Oh well....I wonder if we're know what it was..."

(Meanwhile, somewhere off beyond the Lesser Magellenic Cloud...)
Robotech Master: "WHATTAYA MEAN, 'WE'RE -LOST-'?!!"

taalismn wrote:

Dairugger XV wrote:Curses and I had those spy cameras turned off. Now I missed the tea squirting.

Pretty spectacular...Unfortunately Rathorc was at his bridge station when he did the spit take...
You'd think on a multi-billion dollar space battlefortress, they'd waterproof the control consoles...
I mean...we have cup holders but not water sealing?
Didn't they learn ANYTHING from the Petit Cola Syndrome aboard the original SDF-1?
Pardon me while I reset the circuit breakers and replace some fuzes....
It make take the ventilators a minute or two to vent all the smoke...
Don't worry, Rathorc's unharmed, but the ensign next to him may need skin grafts and psych-con...

Now you understand why we require any posters actually visiting the sets here at Robotech Bloopers to wear flame-proof underwear...Readers beyond the 4th Wall are protected from flashover, but those closer to the action have to have some sort of protection(Not that any User has actually been seriously injured, mind you, since Users have automatic User Immunity....but when that steam-powered fireball leaps out of the inundated computer console in front of you and you can feel it starting to scorch your eyebrows...well, you kinda forget it's virtual flame...)...

taalismn wrote:Now you understand why we require any posters actually visiting the sets here at Robotech Bloopers to wear flame-proof underwear...Readers beyond the 4th Wall are protected from flashover, but those closer to the action have to have some sort of protection(Not that any User has actually been seriously injured, mind you, since Users have automatic User Immunity....but when that steam-powered fireball leaps out of the inundated computer console in front of you and you can feel it starting to scorch your eyebrows...well, you kinda forget it's virtual flame...)...

LOL Great ones!

That is the reason they do take cellular sample and memory recordings too. That way we over here at Clones'RUS can restore you is an accident happens on the set.

WOW!!........This is pretty funny

Snake Eyes wrote::lol: WOW!!........This is pretty funny

Not as funny as Nova Satori's GMP Academy graduation party...I tell yah, when somebody let loose the woodchucks....

Dairugger XV wrote:That wasn't as bad as the platypus, named Spike of all things, in the fruit punch.

They had to abandon the Coast Guard Academy inspired hat toss at the official graduation...considering that they were all wearing full body armor at the time for the event....

taalismn wrote:

Dairugger XV wrote:That wasn't as bad as the platypus, named Spike of all things, in the fruit punch.

They had to abandon the Coast Guard Academy inspired hat toss at the official graduation...considering that they were all wearing full body armor at the time for the event....

Good thing that they don't know about tee peeing. Imagine a group of Zentraedi being taught how to do that. It'd cause some fun situations.

Two words...Battlepod stuffing...

taalismn wrote:Two words...Battlepod stuffing...

LOL So is that because they look like turkeys?

Aramanthus wrote:LOL So is that because they look like turkeys?

"Welcome to Iron Chef Reflex Point! We've assembled the greatest chefs of the world here to compete for the title of Iron Chef! And our secret ingredient today is...FLOWER OF LIFE!!!"

"Ohno..not that stuff...I got enough of it back in the Resistance!"
"Rand...it's like fugu...prepare it wrong and off you go on a magical little trip..."
"I know...oh, I so know..."

taalismn wrote:

Aramanthus wrote:LOL So is that because they look like turkeys?

"Welcome to Iron Chef Reflex Point! We've assembled the greatest chefs of the world here to compete for the title of Iron Chef! And our secret ingredient today is...FLOWER OF LIFE!!!"

"Ohno..not that stuff...I got enough of it back in the Resistance!"
"Rand...it's like fugu...prepare it wrong and off you go on a magical little trip..."
"I know...oh, I so know..."

Rand and Bernard getting dissed by the turncoats at the first village they came to...Of course, due to alignment restrictions, they can't gun the people down as an example to anybody collaborating with the Invid...
Annie steps up: "Well that's just GREAT! You lousy *guilty of fornication with small defenseless woodland animals* with your *suspected of improper relations with electrical equipment* oh-so-high-and-mighty sense of *inbred arrogance born of incestuous relations going back at least eight generations*, you make me sick! You *obscure Zentraedi word for the odd 'off' fellows who always seemed to hanging around the clone vats with that 'look'), you (term illegal in nine solar systems for describing those guilty of...well, I'm seeing it, and -I_ can't believe it...), you can just(Get the children and pubescents out of the room NOW!)"
AS Annie just unloads a straight line of blue language, the guy who was telling off Rand and Bernard just moments ago, has just had his head explode, and several other villagers are rolling on the ground with blood spurting from their ears and eyesockets....
Meanwhile, Rand, his hands clapped over Scott Bernard's ears after HE started to convulse, is staring at Annie in total awe...
"Man....THAT'S harsh!"

taalismn wrote:

Aramanthus wrote:LOL So is that because they look like turkeys?

"Welcome to Iron Chef Reflex Point! We've assembled the greatest chefs of the world here to compete for the title of Iron Chef! And our secret ingredient today is...FLOWER OF LIFE!!!"

"Ohno..not that stuff...I got enough of it back in the Resistance!"
"Rand...it's like fugu...prepare it wrong and off you go on a magical little trip..."
"I know...oh, I so know..."

So, which chef did Rand decide to face off against?

green.nova343 wrote:

taalismn wrote:

Aramanthus wrote:LOL So is that because they look like turkeys?

"Welcome to Iron Chef Reflex Point! We've assembled the greatest chefs of the world here to compete for the title of Iron Chef! And our secret ingredient today is...FLOWER OF LIFE!!!"

"Ohno..not that stuff...I got enough of it back in the Resistance!"
"Rand...it's like fugu...prepare it wrong and off you go on a magical little trip..."
"I know...oh, I so know..."

So, which chef did Rand decide to face off against?

Rand was watching, perhaps even judging, not participating as a chef...

Here's an idea that might be better off in the Alternate Dimensions thread, except that I wanted to see what potential for humor it might be seen to have among you folks....
Robotech Timeloop...
I've seen this idea taken up by fanfiction writers for other series, inspired by 'GRoundhog Day' and a StarGate episode where the characters get caught in a repeating timeloop...a few days, or a matter of years...Only a few individuals are aware of time looping, and they try time and again to identify what it is that's making them repeat the time...Of course, after their immediate attempts to do SERIOUS alterations fail for one reason or other, the timelooped characters(and the fanfictions) then focus on having fun while they while away the time to the next reset(in the Stargate episode, for instance, Teal'C sets out to exact a telling revenge on the guy who EVERY timeloop opens a door in his face...and in a Naruto fanfiction, the student ninja liven up their training by setting out to drive their instructor mad...).
So imagine that a few main Robotech characters...like say Vermillion Squadron, find themselves reliving the same 5-10 year(or whatever) period over and over again...
Sure, they'll try to make changes...Robotech is rather more serious in demeanor than SG-1...and they might make mistakes...First couple of loops, for instance, after trying to convince everybody that they KNOW what's going to happen, they get locked up in the psychiatric ward...Or, save Edwards from the Grand Cannon explosion, only to find him using some OTHER grudge to stab you in the back...and after the twentieth run-through, the members of Vermillion might start going a little crazy...

"Okay...this time Dolza demands we demonstrate our secrets...we go all the way, Lisa..."
"THreesome?"
"No, Ben, no threesome....But Rick, I'm on top...I decided to wear something special for this, this time around.."
"Should I be afraid?"
"Very."
"Good thing I brought a book...Just remember later to get me off flight duty during the Quebec run..."
"I'll break your leg myself..."

Worse yet, occasionally they'll get stuck in somebody ELSE'S timeloop for a few cycles..I mean, what could happen if Vermillion Squadron all found themselves twelve years old again and on the train to their first year at Hogwart's?

So, if you were Vermillion, and were reliving the same ten or so years over and over....how might you mess with people's heads?
Focus here on the humorous angle...