Page 9 of 250

Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 5:28 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL! That was good! :D

Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 5:35 pm
by taalismn
JUsenkyo Guide: "Is tragic story of having to move Cursed Springs abroad to avoid flooding by THree Gorges Dam project! Is too too epic tale of how move Cursed Springs to little valley in North America where nodbody care what crazy Americans say!"

Scott Bernard: "Anybody call me 'Sylvia Stingray' again, I'm going to kick their &*(&*!!"
Lancer and Marlene: "But you look so BEAUTIFUL!"
Scott: "I'll accept that as a compliment from Marlene, but if you, Lancer, suggest makeup tips, you're hitting some new high notes."
Lancer: "Dang, and I was hoping to start up a band called 'The Replicants'!"

Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 6:12 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: Awesome!

Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 6:20 pm
by taalismn
Annie: "Rand makes such a cute raccoon!"
Rand: "cheeeeee!!!"
Lunk: "Ook!"
Annie: "Now is Rook a marmoset or a chincilla?"
Lancer: "Actually she looks like a golden lion tamarin."
Rooks: "Mreee!!!"
Scott: "Admiral Hunter is going to have me under psych-eval SO freakin' fast if I ever include any of this in my report to the REF..."

Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 6:27 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!! :D

Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 6:39 pm
by taalismn
Scott: "Rescued from demented river-god worshippers by Amazon husband-hunters...can it get any worse?"
Old Female Voice: "Congratulations, sky-warrior, you defeated Lace, Amazon warrior woman, during your escape! That makes you her airen!"
Scott: "...oh yeah, I tried to forget about that..."

Mousse: "BELMONT!!! YOU STOLE MY SHAMPOO!!!"
Lancer: "No I didn't! You slipped on my soap."
Mousse: "AND YOU HAVE SOAP TOO?! YOU'RE ALREADY TWO-TIMING MY SHAMPOO!!!???"
Rand: "I take it this is the village idiot, who makes invisible friends out of his hygiene products?"
Rook: "Maybe he doesn't know that the luffa is sneaking around his back making out with the bidet?"
Amazon: "Don't slander kind cuddly Luffa...she have nothing to do with Mousse or Bidet."

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 5:23 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!! That was a great one! :D

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 6:31 pm
by taalismn
Rand: "SCott? You ever wonder if all our adventures, all our pain, and all our trevails...were mere entertainment for some unseen audience?"
Scott: "Go to sleep, Rand, you're starting to get all existentialist again..."

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:01 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL I can see Rand pointing out towards the audience and saying "People!"

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:27 pm
by taalismn
One wrong turn and they're flattened against the 4th wall like bugs on a windshield.

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:30 pm
by Aramanthus
And all of the characters flee from us the fans in terror! :D

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:34 pm
by taalismn
Weekly 30-minute episodes showing various background scenary shots(barracks, woods, hallways, etc....) panning around with only brief glimpses of people and mecha fleeing, ducking behind objects, banking out of sight...

"Black Lion to White Knight, here it comes again! MOve to the side!"
"I can't! ARGH!!! I'm live!"

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:35 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!! All of anime suffers from viewers!

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:40 pm
by taalismn
Actors' strike in anime...the real reason new Robotech is slow in coming out....

"I don't wanna do another tentacle flick!"
(this coming from a long-tendriled ...whatever..)

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:42 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL :lol: :lol: I can see another strike looming in the near future. Anime characters get special sections that a stunt anime characters need to do tentacled scenes for main anime characters.

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:48 pm
by taalismn
"'Fanservice'? Again, with the fanservice! Is this a war drama or a striptease?"
"COuld be worse...they moved the filming of Aika Virgin Mission to a studio in Norway to save production costs...It's winter there, and the production company doesn't have a large heating budget..."

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:52 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL Talk about trying to come in from the cold!

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:40 pm
by taalismn
"Robotech...The Importance of Not Being Seen."

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 11:02 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL :lol: Thank goodness you didn't say the "Importance of being Earnest."

Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 8:00 pm
by taalismn
"A MidSummer Night's Dream---The Robotech Version---With Zor as Bottom, the Invid Regent as Oberon, the Invid Regis as Titania, Sera as Puck, featuring also the Tirolian Players...as set in a Genesis Pit."

Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 4:25 am
by Aramanthus
LOL That was a good one!

Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:43 am
by taalismn
"As You LIke It"--With Sera as Portia, and Lancer as Mercutio...

Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 5:23 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL Very funny! Shakespear and Robotech combined! Just the classic we need! :D

Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 11:23 am
by taalismn
Marcus: "Er...nice skull on your shoulder.."
Maia: "Thank you...belonged to the last ^*^& dumbarse who made a lame remark like that."

Marcus, Alex, and Louie are listening to Janice sing...cut to Maia eating angrily with her eyes closed in frustration..
Marcus: "Is she for real?"
Maia: "NO(fork) she's not, (chew)believe me (chew) I know(stab)"*YYIIEEE*
(pauses and realizes she's missed her plate and just pinned Louie's hand to the table with her fork)
Maia: "Oops..."

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 12:28 am
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!! Poor Marcus! I like the different response you had Maia give!

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 7:08 pm
by taalismn
Janice changes into her holo-diva performance apperance, steps up to the front of the lounge, raises the microphone...
*EEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP-BOOOOPPPP*

Janice looks at all the REF personnel staggering around the lounge clutching their ears after the microphone feedback..

(nervous grin)"Er...oops?"

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 9:10 pm
by taalismn
Marcus: "Do I have to get you mad enough to want to kill me first? I'm real good at getting people agitated around me like that!"

Alex: "Yep....The rest of Skull Squadron for that shoulder patch remark...Scott Bernard for trying to shoot that Invid girl he's sweet on, to name some notables.."

Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 7:13 pm
by taalismn
Even THEY were aware of that in the series...and especially where Bowie and Musica were concerned...


Meanwhile....

Rick and Lisa on the SDF-1...in space...They're in an exterior observation lounge, the armored shutters pulled back, but the door's locked...they're alone...they're young...they're hormone-driven...clothes fly...tongues entwine...their skin grows hot...their pulses thunder...their breath grows gasped in moans or passion...*GRONK*...they pause at the strange noise, but sense nothing, then go back to dancing the Dance of Life...

Behind them, unseen, Khyron's Glaug tumbles lifelessly away, red misting out from the seams of the cockpit....

Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 10:25 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!! Those were hysterical! :lol: :lol:

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:28 pm
by taalismn
What Invid are REALLY THinking:

#...five more hours of being cooped up in here and I can get back to the hot tub...#

#...yeeesshhhh! Look at that motorcyclist go! Doesn't he know the speed limit's only 45 MPH here? What an idiot!#

#...fly here, fly there, harvest that Flower! Blast that Human! Investigate this, investigate that, stop them, let them go! Carp, carp, complain, and order! Doesn't that bestch EVER do anything HERSELF?!#

# Flower of Life? I'm ALLERGIC to Flowers!#

#Oh S****! I left the oven on back at the HIve!#

#Look at the pretty red robot! Do you think it will be my friend?#

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:44 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!! Those were great!

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:56 pm
by taalismn
Regis's 'Phoenix' rises from the Earth and soars towards space---
-when it suddenly lurches to a shuddering halt..
Regis: "#$%&*! Tried to give it the gas with the parking brake still on!"

Icarus getting whaled upon by Haydonite Wraiths when a solitary Alpha-Beta Legios shows up and opens up with 'the old-fashioned way', and dusts the alien craft...then one of the left-over missiles lurches back around and plunges right into the Icarus's bridge.
Scott: "Oops...."

Haydonite Wraiths upon Encountering Skull Squadron for the SECOND Time...
Haydonite Pilot: ^Uh-oh...why'd our power rating just change from UNBEATABLE ALIEN HORDE to CHICKENFEED CANNONFODDER?!^

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:05 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!! Some more AWESOME ones!!!

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:18 pm
by taalismn
General Reinhardt walks into Captain Grant's recovery room...
...to find Doctor Grant already there, straddling on his back, with his arms bent and pinned behind him, and in the process of bending his unbroken leg up around his head...
Jean: "What did I tell you about getting up and putting weight on that leg!!!???"
Vince:(gasping) "ARGH!!! OKay, okay!!! I promise to take it easy!!!"
Reinhardt promptly leaves, mentally making a note to have some OTHER doctor perform his routine physical....

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:27 pm
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!! :lol: :lol:

It'd make me nervous when she say turn your head and cough too!

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:40 pm
by taalismn
Bowie Grant is playing piano when Nova Satori comes in...
Nova: (leaning against piano)"Bowie...I just want to be your friend.."
(unfortunately her actions accidently causes the key cover to fall closed....on Bowie's fingers(crash)...with a muffled yelp he pulls his hands out and rests them on top of the piano...where a startled Nova accidentally yanks out the support for the piano cover, causing it to lid down on BOwie's already abused hands(crunch) eliciting another yell...rushing around to help, Nova accidentally knocks the bench into the back of Bowie's knees, slamming him forward against the piano(wunch) cracking his kneecaps...he falls backwards in pain, slamming his head against the bench on the way down...(wham!) and he's out....
The rest of the 15th runs in to investigate the commotion, to find Bowie out cold and bloodied with Nova standing over him...)
Nova: (sweatdropping) "I can explain...?"

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:56 pm
by Aramanthus
LOL Reminds me of some of Peter Sellers better moves! :lol: :D

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 11:30 am
by Rathorc Lemenger
Scene: The 15th ATACs are pulling up along the street, and start to get off their Hovercycles. When they start to hear some police sirens blaring in the distance and coming ever closer.

Dana: What the heck? *starts to look at the others in her squad* We didn't even do anything yet.

Just as she finally finishes saying that, a much older woman goes zooming by on a scooter at a high rate of speed.

Scooter Mama: GET OUT OF MY WAY, THERE'S A DEAL I MUST GET TO.

Just as she finishes saying that, she's rounding a distant corner, just as the whole Bokuto Police Department goes wizzing by, Obviosly trying to case her down.

Dente: *looking towards the corner where the woman dissappeared* Wait a minute, did she say "a deal"? I'm there. *Jumps back on his hover bike and takes off after the crowd of police cruisers*

Dana: Oy-vey.

**************

Signed,
Rathorc Lemenger.

P.S. For those not in the know, for the non-Robotech characters, just watch "Your Under Arrest".

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 2:14 pm
by taalismn
Musica and Bowir are commiserating with Dana, when Dante comes charging in...
Dante: "A bunch of GMP goons just showed up asking for Musica!"
Dana: "Oh great....Nova's here..."
Dante: "Nah, and I wouldn't worry about these guys finding her."
Dana, Bowie, Musica:"?!"
(meanwhile, Louie and Sean are confronting a pair of GMP troopers and their commanding officer...)
GMP Officer: "I am GMP INspector ClouSEAU...!"

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:02 pm
by GaredBattlespike
I have one: Scene; The climatic battle between the SDF-1 & the Zentradei Fleet, Minmae prepares to sing on her (in)famous broadcast...
*Breaking into the transmission is Bretai, wearing a Zentradei-sized swashbuckler's outfit(complete with neat sword)*
Bretai "My name is Inyego Montoya...You killed my father, prepare to die"

Capt. Goloval "I knew that shouldn't have let him borrow that movie..."*sighs*

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:13 pm
by glitterboy2098
how about:

Scene; The climatic battle between the SDF-1 & the Zentradei Fleet, the crew prepares the broadcast...
Sammy: "captain, urgent message from the sound crew. Minmei has lost her voice"
Gloval: "initiate plan B."
Vannessa: "plan B aye"

down below, a comm tech slips a tape labelled "girls gone wild" into a player.

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:49 pm
by taalismn
History Goes VERY Awry....

Azonia walks out of her cabin aboard Khyron's rebuilt monitor, belting a robe around her. She approaches two troopers.
Azonia: "Dispose of that body in the cabin for me, please? Really, I expected BETTER of the man!(walking away) ...no stamina whatsoever......all that bluster and when it comes time to execute the mission...phawf!..."

Fearfully the two guards approach the room. They look in, go pale...but dutifully start wrapping Khyron's dead body in a sheet and carrying it to the garbage disposal....

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:09 am
by batlchip
:shock: :eek: :?

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:28 am
by Aramanthus
ROFLMAO!!! Those were some AWESOME ones! Please keep them coming!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 6:05 pm
by DhAkael
taalismn wrote:History Goes VERY Awry....

Azonia walks out of her cabin aboard Khyron's rebuilt monitor, belting a robe around her. She approaches two troopers.
Azonia: "Dispose of that body in the cabin for me, please? Really, I expected BETTER of the man!(walking away) ...no stamina whatsoever......all that bluster and when it comes time to execute the mission...phawf!..."

Fearfully the two guards approach the room. They look in, go pale...but dutifully start wrapping Khyron's dead body in a sheet and carrying it to the garbage disposal....


The flower of life has many benifits... THAT not being one of them ;)
Remember kids; don't do dried alien flower-petals, cuz then you won't be able to have fun with hot alien babes. :D

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:08 pm
by taalismn
A different take on the above...

Khyron: (stepping into quarters) "Ah, I am back, Azonia! It took a month, but I'm back with the needed parts for our repairs...ayh? Have you put on weight?"
Azonia's sitting at the other end of the room....uncharacteristically....pregnant...
Azonia: "This is your fault."
Khyron: "What? When did -this- happen?!"
Azonia: "Back when we were both drunk off our arses on Garudan ale...Remember?"
Khyron: "No...."
Azonia: "Well, we obviously did something!"
Khyron: "Not possible...I'm not into micronian perversio---YIIIEEE!!!"
(He goes diving to the floor as laser fire tears into the walls around him...) "AZONIA!!!"
Azonia: (Leveling one of those big cheesewheel-tommygun laser pistols at him) "'Micronian Perversions'? THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!!"(opens fire again)
Khyron: "This is an aberration of ---"(ZAP!)(ducks again)
Azonia: "Oh, I'm an -aberration- now?! I -knew- it..you find me fat and unattractive!(sniff)"(ZAP! ZAP!)
Khyron: "What does being fat have to do with anything? You're not fat, you're---"
Azonia: "Oh no you ain't! You're not going to sweet-talk me!"(ZAP!)
Khyron: "What do you mean! You're acting craz---GAHHH!"(ZAAPPP!!!)
Azonia: "Crazy, am I?! And whose fault is THAT, I ask you!???"(ZAP!ZAP!)

RDF Communications Tech: "Sir, we're getting a strange transmission...it's short wave...we can barely make it out...Origin point somewhere in the Amazon rainforest. "
RDF Watch Officer: "Who is it?"
CommOfficer: "They're claiming to be Commander Khyron...he's claiming he;s trapped in his quarters and is demanding the 'micronians send him an expert in dealing with crazed females'. I think I can make out weapons fire in the background!"
Watch Officer: "Is Doctor Phil McGraw still alive? Can we draft him for a suicide mission?"

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:33 pm
by DhAkael
Ms. Macross Pagent;

Announcer: "And our next contestant...Ms. Lyn Minmei!"

(Various questions are asked of her. Rick Hunter has been called into the hanger bay well before the pagent opens)

Cpt. Gloval: "So, do you have a boyfriend"
Minmei: *Annoying giggle and sickening smile* "Oh no, I don't have time for boyfriends"

(sound of heavy metalic foot-falls at full sprint)

*PUNT* -Squip-

(Full-armour VF in 'Skull' markings, makes "V" with arms after field kicking Minmei out of the ampitheatre)

Fokker: "...Figure I could use the time in the stockade to relax...Rick'll forgive me after she said THAT comment! Ungrateful little (censored)!"

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 9:16 pm
by taalismn
"And our nexxxxttttt contestant! Lynnnnn Minnnmeeiiii!!!"
"Thank you! Thank you!"
"And for our first question...What's your favorite color?"
"Oh, that's east...it's blue! No, GREE-AYYIIIEEEEeeee!!!"(gets flipped off stage)
"Neexxxxxttttttt contessttaaanttttt!!!!"
(next swimsuit-clad beauty steps up, nervously looking for whatever pancake-flipped the previous girl off stage)

(Meanwhile the Three Zentraedi Spies are encountering a rather red-eyed little bunnyrabbit in a back-alley...)

Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 1:30 am
by glitterboy2098
Rick: "tyrol!"
Lisa: "tyrol"
Breetai: "tyrol"
Exedor: "it's only a model"

Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 2:57 pm
by taalismn
"That's not a destroid! You're banging two sheet-metal-wrapped bricks together!"