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taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#11 Electric Shavers
#12 Baby carts

#13 Porta-Johns
#14 Cigarette Lighters
#15 Kitchen Stoves
#16 Salad Shooters

SRoss wrote:[

#17 Guitar Amps (Cause Lancer's Rockers was sooo 1980s.)

taalismn wrote:Lang: "I can fix this!"
Kim: "If you try any more, we're going to have to CUT it off you."
Maistroff: "Neckties aren't supposed to wrap around your armpit like that..."

Arnie100 wrote:Lang: "This is my new veri-tie! The ultimate in men's fashion! A tie that ties itself!"
Rick: "I could use that!"

taalismn wrote:Lang: "To operate it, you simply slide the tie clip here like SO-"
verrppbreep"gyahhh!!!"clang"AAAGGGHHHH!!!"dingslidddeeewerp"BLAAHHH!"zerpZIP'..urk!"
Gloval: " "
Lisa: "..I'm going to be sick...."
Claudia: "EMTs to the bridge wardroom! Bring jaws of life!"
Maistroff: "Is there a chiropractor on this ship?"
Kim: "..what is it with men and gadgets?"

SRoss wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#1: Neckties.

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#1: Neckties.

#2 Marital Aides
#3 Softdrink Machines
#4 Blenders
#5 Hair Curlers
#6 Chia Pets
#7 Golf Carts
#8 Rombas
#9 Donuts
#10 Laser Copiers

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#11 Electric Shavers
#12 Baby carts

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#11 Electric Shavers
#12 Baby carts

#13 Porta-Johns
#14 Cigarette Lighters
#15 Kitchen Stoves
#16 Salad Shooters

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#11 Electric Shavers
#12 Baby carts

#13 Porta-Johns
#14 Cigarette Lighters
#15 Kitchen Stoves
#16 Salad Shooters

#17 Guitar Amps (Cause Lancer's Rockers was sooo 1980s.)

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:[

#17 Guitar Amps (Cause Lancer's Rockers was sooo 1980s.)

#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

taalismn wrote:#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

HA HA HA!!! At last my master plan has come to fruition!

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

Opterra

Edwards: "HA HA HA!!! At last my master plan has come to fruition!"

Suddenly the accumulated crap of the SDF-1 Defolds above him...

Edwards: "Oh Crap!"

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

Opterra

Edwards: "HA HA HA!!! At last my master plan has come to fruition!"

Suddenly the accumulated crap of the SDF-1 Defolds above him...

Edwards: "Oh Crap!"

"So....all the Flower of Life needed was FERTILIZER?!"
"Indeed...the Invid are quite pleased with the results."

Arnie100 wrote:(SDF-1, Dr. Lang's lab)

Lang: "Alright, I'm gonna try out my toilet... (sound of flushing, then...) uh-oh...the toilet's disappeared!"

(SDF-1, Bridge)

Gloval: Bozhe Moi! MY CHAIR!!"
Lisa: "The SMELL!!"
Kim, Sammie and Vanessa: "EEEEEEWWWWWW!!"
Claudia: "That's it...I want a transfer."

taalismn wrote:"Seen Rick?"
"Last I saw him, he was heading for the john."
"Captain just issued a total recall of all the new toilets."
"I wonder why?"
(sudden wind and decompression alarm)

(elsewhere)
"...okay, either somebody was smoking dope in the men's room or I've just been caught with my pants down...Two moons?"

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

Opterra

Edwards: "HA HA HA!!! At last my master plan has come to fruition!"

Suddenly the accumulated crap of the SDF-1 Defolds above him...

Edwards: "Oh Crap!"

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

Opterra

Edwards: "HA HA HA!!! At last my master plan has come to fruition!"

Suddenly the accumulated crap of the SDF-1 Defolds above him...

Edwards: "Oh Crap!"

"So....all the Flower of Life needed was FERTILIZER?!"
"Indeed...the Invid are quite pleased with the results."

Arnie100 wrote:

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:#18 Flush Toilets----Because the Fold-Flush was just asking for trouble.

Opterra

Edwards: "HA HA HA!!! At last my master plan has come to fruition!"

Suddenly the accumulated crap of the SDF-1 Defolds above him...

Edwards: "Oh Crap!"

"So....all the Flower of Life needed was FERTILIZER?!"
"Indeed...the Invid are quite pleased with the results."

"I don't think Edwards...Good Lord!

taalismn wrote:"So, in this scenario, what is T.R. Edwards' greatest attribute?"
"Nitrogen."

Arnie100 wrote:Edwards: "It was in my mouth..."

taalismn wrote:Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology


#19 Hairpieces---The REAL reason Field Marshal Leonard resents the Pioneer Expedition running off

taalismn wrote:Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#21 Vendng Machines (One told Lunk he reached his spending AND eating limit)
#22 Smartphones (Remember that scene in Transformers? Where the phone went nuts?)

taalismn wrote:

taalismn wrote:Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#20 Coffee Makers---As Scott Bernard discovers that even his morning cup of joe ain't safe.....

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#21 Vendng Machines (One told Lunk he reached his spending AND eating limit)
#22 Smartphones (Remember that scene in Transformers? Where the phone went nuts?)

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:

Things Never To Enhance With ROBOTECHnology

#21 Vendng Machines (One told Lunk he reached his spending AND eating limit)
#22 Smartphones (Remember that scene in Transformers? Where the phone went nuts?)

"Random Items In Rifts' introduced the idea of the smartass phone. You can well imagine what that entails.

taalismn wrote:Ben Dixon: "Hey waiter! I think you mixed up my order with somebody else's! I didn't order a pineapple salad side with my steak!"

Arnie100 wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed"Oh, hi, Cmdr. Fokker! Wait, aren't you...crap."

taalismn wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"I just saw this picture of what baby Dana will look like when she grows up! Boy is she gonna be hot!"

taalismn wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"I'm still a virgin and I don't have a girlfriend in the script?"

"My lucky rabbit's foot ran away!"

"Okay, who canceled all my magazine subscriptions?"

"Damn, my four leaf clover shed!"

"My lucky horseshoe unbent!"

"Who's the tall guy in the dark robe? I swear he's been following me around all day!"

"My lucky t-shirt got lost in the wash!"

Arnie100 wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"Whaddya mean my cable account's been frozen!?"

"Why is this guy measuring me and what's that funny-looking box over there?"

"Hey...I don't have any lines in next week's episode!"

"Somebody made a mistake...my name's in the obituaries!"

taalismn wrote:]Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"It's polite to ask somebody BEFORE you go borrowing their stuff? Wanna mean 'I won't be needing it'?!"

"Geez...I didn't know we had so many stray black cats on this ship!"

"Wow, talk about the detail in the EVE holographic system! I could swear those look like vultures circling overhead!"

"My Magic 8-Ball rolled away!"

Arnie100 wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"I've been replaced in the squadron??"

"Who moved into my quarters?!"

"Why is everybody ignoring me?"

"Oh, hi, Cmdr. Fokker! Wait, aren't you...crap."

taalismn wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"Somebody stole my boots! WHILE I was wearing them!"

"You hear harps, guys? It's been driving me crazy!"

"Whattya mean, have I updated my resume lately?"

"Clean out my locker? Why would I want to clean out my locker?"

"Guys, there must be some mistake..my keypass doesn't work on the employee washroom any longer."

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"I just saw this picture of what baby Dana will look like when she grows up! Boy is she gonna be hot!"

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Other Signs Ben Dixon Should Have Known He Was Doomed

"I just saw this picture of what baby Dana will look like when she grows up! Boy is she gonna be hot!"

I was WONDERING how and when you were going to spin that in....

"Hmmmm...my fortune cookie sez 'make no long term plans'. What's that supposed to mean?"

taalismn wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

taalismn wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

Arnie100 wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

*Set to Barney singing "I love you, you love me" and twerking while doing it.

taalismn wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

*Set to Strobe---- Instant wanking headache.

*Offset the Field of Perception by 30 Degrees----Watch him walk into walls

*Set to Play 'Doom'---Let Edwards try to convince everybody he's seeing demons nobody else does

*Reruns---Loops 'Minmei's Greatest Laser Show Concerts'. over and over and over and over....

Arnie100 wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

*set to scene of Cmdr. Fokker with big 'ole hand cannon pointing at Edwards face.

*Set to scene of Rick and Lisa getting maried in a continuous loop.

*Permanently turned off...let Edwards think he's blind.

*Set to scene of Rick's Valkyrie's foot stomping on Edwards.

taalismn wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:
* Zoom In/Zoom Out-----randomly changes magnification setting from very far to ULTRA CLOSE.
Watch Edwards go bonkers as he suddenly finds himself looking down the pores in Benson's skin.

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

Set it to show the movie Ishtar on continuous loop.

taalismn wrote:

taalismn wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

*Out of Control Truck---Varies the type of truck to make it more plausible. Watch Tommy-boy concuss himself jumping out of the way.

Arnie100 wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

*Set to Barney singing "I love you, you love me" and twerking while doing it.

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Fun WIth T.R. Edwards' Artificial Eye:

*Set to Barney singing "I love you, you love me" and twerking while doing it.

Sadly, this would backfiore as when Edwards linked to the Invid Brain, the stupid Invid device took it as an idea to create and unleash on the pursuing REF taskforce...
...who immediately declared 'Exterminatus' on Optera and glassed the entire planet.

SRoss wrote:[

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

Ditto.

Oh OK you can use ones from the Crossover thead too.

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF BEN DIXON

Please enter your choice from among the various ways Ben's been killed in the Bloopers.

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

Ditto.

Oh OK you can use ones from the Crossover thead too.

taalismn wrote:Let's see...off the top of my head...
"NG!NG!NG!NG!NG!"---Tommy being savagely beaten head-first by his headpiece by an electromagnetic in his quarters
"Yhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwwwwwwww!!!"---Tommy being pushed down the Grand Cannon.
"Oh realURKKKKHHHH!!!" ---Tommy being Hulked on by Minmei
"I didn't order a call g*BLAM!"---Tommy being shot by the Minmeinator
"So you know kung-fUGHH!!!" ---Tommy getting his throat crushed by a lucky shot from Lynn Kyle
"Time to diIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" ---Tommy being shot in the crotch by Rick Hunter
"Yeah and who the hell are you peOghaalaaaaallalal..."----Tommy being slowly murdered by all the potential Hunter kids
"Missile tone? Where the f-"---Tommy getting shot down by Roy Fokker
"Now this is liv-larggghhhhhh..."---Tommy being poisoned by Minmei
"What the heeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll....."---Tommy's plane coming apart in midair after being sabotaged by Rick Hunter

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF BEN DIXON

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Let's see...off the top of my head...
"NG!NG!NG!NG!NG!"---Tommy being savagely beaten head-first by his headpiece by an electromagnetic in his quarters
"Yhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwwwwwwww!!!"---Tommy being pushed down the Grand Cannon.
"Oh realURKKKKHHHH!!!" ---Tommy being Hulked on by Minmei
"I didn't order a call g*BLAM!"---Tommy being shot by the Minmeinator
"So you know kung-fUGHH!!!" ---Tommy getting his throat crushed by a lucky shot from Lynn Kyle
"Time to diIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" ---Tommy being shot in the crotch by Rick Hunter
"Yeah and who the hell are you peOghaalaaaaallalal..."----Tommy being slowly murdered by all the potential Hunter kids
"Missile tone? Where the f-"---Tommy getting shot down by Roy Fokker
"Now this is liv-larggghhhhhh..."---Tommy being poisoned by Minmei
"What the heeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll....."---Tommy's plane coming apart in midair after being sabotaged by Rick Hunter

For a minute there I thought you were referring to the other Tommy.

Arnie100 wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

.

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF BEN DIXON

Please enter your choice from among the various ways Ben's been killed in the Bloopers.

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

Ditto.

Oh OK you can use ones from the Crossover thead too.

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:[

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

Ditto.

Oh OK you can use ones from the Crossover thead too.

Rick Hunter: "I've loved them all."
Lisa: "Ditto."

Arnie100 wrote:

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF BEN DIXON

Please enter your choice from among the various ways Ben's been killed in the Bloopers.

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

Ditto.

Oh OK you can use ones from the Crossover thead too.

Dixon: "You mean I died multiple times in these threads?!"
Edwards: "No kidding...I mean...who did I p1ss off so much to deserve this kind of attention?"

(Everyone stands up and raises their hand)

Edwards:

taalismn wrote:Let's see...off the top of my head...
"NG!NG!NG!NG!NG!"---Tommy being savagely beaten head-first by his headpiece by an electromagnetic in his quarters
"Yhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwwwwwwww!!!"---Tommy being pushed down the Grand Cannon.
"Oh realURKKKKHHHH!!!" ---Tommy being Hulked on by Minmei
"I didn't order a call g*BLAM!"---Tommy being shot by the Minmeinator
"So you know kung-fUGHH!!!" ---Tommy getting his throat crushed by a lucky shot from Lynn Kyle
"Time to diIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" ---Tommy being shot in the crotch by Rick Hunter
"Yeah and who the hell are you peOghaalaaaaallalal..."----Tommy being slowly murdered by all the potential Hunter kids
"Missile tone? Where the f-"---Tommy getting shot down by Roy Fokker
"Now this is liv-larggghhhhhh..."---Tommy being poisoned by Minmei
"What the heeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll....."---Tommy's plane coming apart in midair after being sabotaged by Rick Hunter

SRoss wrote:

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF BEN DIXON

Claudia splitting Ben up the middle with a chainsaw.

Naked Miyria stuffing Ben into the toilet.

SRoss wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

Anything involving Edwards meeting the Gura Invid.

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Let's see...off the top of my head...
"NG!NG!NG!NG!NG!"---Tommy being savagely beaten head-first by his headpiece by an electromagnetic in his quarters
"Yhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwwwwwwww!!!"---Tommy being pushed down the Grand Cannon.
"Oh realURKKKKHHHH!!!" ---Tommy being Hulked on by Minmei
"I didn't order a call g*BLAM!"---Tommy being shot by the Minmeinator
"So you know kung-fUGHH!!!" ---Tommy getting his throat crushed by a lucky shot from Lynn Kyle
"Time to diIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" ---Tommy being shot in the crotch by Rick Hunter
"Yeah and who the hell are you peOghaalaaaaallalal..."----Tommy being slowly murdered by all the potential Hunter kids
"Missile tone? Where the f-"---Tommy getting shot down by Roy Fokker
"Now this is liv-larggghhhhhh..."---Tommy being poisoned by Minmei
"What the heeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll....."---Tommy's plane coming apart in midair after being sabotaged by Rick Hunter

For a minute there I thought you were referring to the other Tommy.

shhhh...some critics might get the wrong idea...

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:

TOP 10 BLOOPER REEL DEATHS OF T.R. EDWARDS

.

Anything involving chainsaws.

taalismn wrote:And the time Rick and Lisa put the giant genetically engineered chameleon-skinned crocodile in Edwards' swimming pool...
'"That did NOT happen! Show me where that happened!"
Okay.
*SPLASH*GNASH"YYYAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"SPLISHCRUNCHROLLMANGLEGRINDDEVOUR
Just now.
" "