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taalismn wrote:Vanessa: "HE'S complaining?! I was taking a nice hot SPONGEBATH when he starts making noises about 'disgusting humans' and how he'd 'bathe us all in blood'! And you know, he saw me NAKED! I feel...unclean..."
Corg: "As well you should! I felt nothing but disgust being forced to come in contact with your uncovered human form...touching your unclothed, wet, shapes....being pushed around your ...hideous....slick....freakishly soft...."
Annie: "Vanessa-san, I'm not sure a weedwacker is designed to be used like that..."

SRoss wrote:Kim: "Don't worry! I know this Clint Eastwood wannabe" (Pointing at Ayres) "Wouldn't do, so I called in REAL help!!!"

Sister of Cleaning: (Kicking in the door) "PREPARE TO BURN CARNAL HELLSPO!!!? Wait that's a loofah!?!"

Loofah Corg: "Please I'll do anything!!! Just get me away from these insane humans!!!"

Sister of Cleaning: "Anything?"

Annie: "I think I'm going to go back to the other room now..."

taalismn wrote:(Wall smashes in...no, it's not the Kool-Aid Guy)
Immaculate Marine: "ARRRGGHHHHH!!!! Disease-shedding heretics abound! THis screams for the cleansing balm of the Soap God! AGHHH!!! What is this unspeakable abomination! YOu share a common filth-laden absorbent reservoir of corruption?! UGH!!! The vector of dark rot is made obvious! Fear not, the Time fo Cleansing is at hand! Starting with the incineration of that devil-rag! LET THE FIRES BURN HOT AND CLEAN!!!"
Sister of Cleaning: "Oh (frustration)...."
Corg-Loofah:"...i hate crossovers...."

SRoss wrote:Loofah Corg dodged, desperately trying to avoid the flames... " WHEN I FIND THE PEOPLE KEEP WRITING THIS! MY VENGEANCE WILL KNOW NO BOUNDS!!! Ow! Hot! Hot! Hot!"

In another dimension, Taalismn and SRoss high five each other...

Dairugger XV wrote:Bernard: "Anymore. It doesn't happen to Minmei anymore. Though not that you've said that, they will probably start up again."

Elsewhere....

Minmei: "Kyle, why are covered in butter and dangling over boiling water?"
Kyle: "mmrph! mmrph! mmrph!"
Minmei: "Kyle, I'm not into the whole kissing cousins thing anymore. So please, find a girlfriend."

taalismn wrote:'Shrimp' doesn't apply to Kyle based on his size...it's because of his...size...

taalismn wrote:Annie: "You know, even for my life, THAT was unusual..."
Rook: "What part do you mean? The part where the big guy in the shiny armor accidentally burnt all the clothing off that maid girl and after seeing her naked started running around screaming something about 'cooties!', or the part where the supposedly dead Macross bridge bunny in the bath towel started chasing and beating with a garden power tool the incendiary-fluid-soaked and ON FIRE bathtub sponge that, I might add, was screaming heart-felt threats to invisible beings it claims are writing its misfortune?"
Annie: "Yeah, that part."

Arnie100 wrote:Rook: "Don't worry; Annie, with these guys (points at The Fourth Wall Gang), this is all perfectly normal matetial for them..."
Annie: "And they say WE'RE disturbed!"
Rook: "No kidding. Perfectly normal people don't come up with this stuff. For Corg; on the other hand, that is normality!"

SRoss wrote:SRoss: (Typing furiously) "... And then, the Chinese National Ping-Pong team burst in ... mistaking Corg for their ball started ..."

Annie: "See what I mean. I bet this crap doesn't happen to Minmei."

Dairugger XV wrote:Bernard: "Anymore. It doesn't happen to Minmei anymore. Though not that you've said that, they will probably start up again."

Elsewhere....

Minmei: "Kyle, why are covered in butter and dangling over boiling water?"
Kyle: "mmrph! mmrph! mmrph!"
Minmei: "Kyle, I'm not into the whole kissing cousins thing anymore. So please, find a girlfriend."

taalismn wrote:

Dairugger XV wrote:Bernard: "Anymore. It doesn't happen to Minmei anymore. Though not that you've said that, they will probably start up again."

Elsewhere....

Minmei: "Kyle, why are covered in butter and dangling over boiling water?"
Kyle: "mmrph! mmrph! mmrph!"
Minmei: "Kyle, I'm not into the whole kissing cousins thing anymore. So please, find a girlfriend."

Supply Officer: "Funny...where'd the mess hall's entire supply of cocktail sauce go?"

Arnie100 wrote:Gura-Invid Princess: "Sisters? Did someone order take-out? There's a package with a note saying "Enjoy your free meal!"
Kyle "(Stuffed inside package) NNNNNOOOOOO!!"
Gura-Invid Princess: "There's also crates of something called 'cocktail sauce'!"

taalismn wrote:'Shrimp' doesn't apply to Kyle based on his size...it's because of his...size...

Arnie100 wrote:

taalismn wrote:'Shrimp' doesn't apply to Kyle based on his size...it's because of his...size...

Kyle: "Hey, cut that out!"
Gura-Invid Princess: "Okay!! (Pulling out a rather large meat cleaver)"
Kyle: "I wasn't talking to you! "

SRoss wrote:Suddenly a Psychiatrist and two Orderlies burst in.

Doctor: "Quick! Where's the guy shouting about invisible enemies!!!"

Sammy: "Right there!"

*pft*

Loofah Corg: "...ohlookattheinvids..."(phd)

Orderly #1: "What about those two?"

Doctor: "Better safe then sorry..."

*pft*

Immaculate Marine: "...Icantestecolours..."(phd)

*pft*

Sister of Cleaning: "...oopsie..."(phd)

Orderly #2: "Don't worry Ms La Bell; Happy Daze Psychiatric Home prides itself on quick discrete interventions."

taalismn wrote:"Look, guys, the girl and the guy I can understand, but bringing this filthy sponge back? That goes into the incinerator with the rest of the garbage."
Corg-Loofah: "...oh, look at the pretty flames..."

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Corg was cremated? Well, that was short. Too short....What to do next?"
Corg-in-limbo: ("...oh, reincarnation's going to be a -bastard-, isn't it?...")

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Corg was cremated? Well, that was short. Too short....What to do next?"
Corg-in-limbo: ("...oh, reincarnation's going to be a -bastard-, isn't it?...")

Fourth Wall Gang: (Getting up from lighting candles, dropping their monk habits) "Hell yeah!"

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Corg was cremated? Well, that was short. Too short....What to do next?"
Corg-in-limbo: ("...oh, reincarnation's going to be a -bastard-, isn't it?...")

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Corg was cremated? Well, that was short. Too short....What to do next?"
Corg-in-limbo: ("...oh, reincarnation's going to be a -bastard-, isn't it?...")

Fourth Wall Gang: (Getting up from lighting candles, dropping their monk habits) "Hell yeah!"

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Corg was cremated? Well, that was short. Too short....What to do next?"
Corg-in-limbo: ("...oh, reincarnation's going to be a -bastard-, isn't it?...")

Fourth Wall Gang: (Getting up from lighting candles, dropping their monk habits) "Hell yeah!"

Well, I traded my monk habit for priest; just as addictive, you just pay more for each hit.

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

Pinkie Pie: "I feel like I just dodged a very large bullet...."

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

Pinkie Pie: "I feel like I just dodged a very large bullet...."

Arnie100 wrote:

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

Pinkie Pie: "I feel like I just dodged a very large bullet...."

(Pinkie-Pie suddenly finds herself lassoed and hog-tied)

Pinky-Pie: "What the --?!"
Annie: "My Corgie-Pony needs a girlfriend!"
Pinky-Pie:

taalismn wrote:Annie: "I thought I'd go into horse breeding as a sideline to that farm Lunk and I were going to run..."
Rook: "I seriously hope you're not planning on using THEM as your breeding stock, because one, it's wrong on SO many levels, and two, have you really considered the possible offspring of a total airhead and a raving psychopath?"

taalismn wrote:Scott: "If Corg breaks his leg, can I put him down?"(sound of shotgun slide being worked)

Arnie100 wrote:

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

Pinkie Pie: "I feel like I just dodged a very large bullet...."

(Pinkie-Pie suddenly finds herself lassoed and hog-tied)

Pinky-Pie: "What the --?!"
Annie: "My Corgie-Pony needs a girlfriend!"
Pinky-Pie:

taalismn wrote:Annie: "I thought I'd go into horse breeding as a sideline to that farm Lunk and I were going to run..."
Rook: "I seriously hope you're not planning on using THEM as your breeding stock, because one, it's wrong on SO many levels, and two, have you really considered the possible offspring of a total airhead and a raving psychopath?"

SRoss wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, is there anything else you've ever wanted? "
Annie: "A pink pony!"
Corg: "Oh, no!"

Pinkie Pie: "I feel like I just dodged a very large bullet...."

(Pinkie-Pie suddenly finds herself lassoed and hog-tied)

Pinky-Pie: "What the --?!"
Annie: "My Corgie-Pony needs a girlfriend!"
Pinky-Pie:

You know, that's too cruel, even for a pony.

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Annie: "I thought I'd go into horse breeding as a sideline to that farm Lunk and I were going to run..."
Rook: "I seriously hope you're not planning on using THEM as your breeding stock, because one, it's wrong on SO many levels, and two, have you really considered the possible offspring of a total airhead and a raving psychopath?"

Possibly Her?

taalismn wrote:Scott: "If Corg breaks his leg, can I put him down?"(sound of shotgun slide being worked)

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Scott: "If Corg breaks his leg, can I put him down?"(sound of shotgun slide being worked)

Lancer: "Scott... That's too crude, here use this..." (Hands him a baseball bat)

Arnie100 wrote:Corgie-Pony: "I HATE humans."
Pinkie-Pie: "I'm starting to feel the same way."
Corgie-Pony: "At LAST! A kindred spirit!"

Arnie100 wrote:Corgie-Pony: "I HATE humans."
Pinkie-Pie: "I'm starting to feel the same way."
Corgie-Pony: "At LAST! A kindred spirit!"

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Corgie-Pony: "I HATE humans."
Pinkie-Pie: "I'm starting to feel the same way."
Corgie-Pony: "At LAST! A kindred spirit!"

Annie: "See? It's love!"
Sera: "It's more like mutual dislike."
Annie: "It can grow into love. And no more talk about about Corg having to be put down because of a broken leg! Why would he break his leg?"
Scott: "Gopher holes."
Annie: "Scott, you were born in space! What would you know about gophers?"
Scott: "Please, I WAS paying attention to Rand's lectures on survival in the wild AND to what was on the daily menu."
Lancer: "Still have fond memories of that one we really had to work for. Achievement added a certain spice to that meal."
Scott: "The one we had to disarm first after going through several boobytrapped burrows? The one that blew up Rand at least once until we ran it over with that golfcart? Yes, revenge was sweet."
Annie: "Anyways we don't have gophers around here for Corg to break his leg in their holes!"
Rand: "It was a lot of work, but I finally managed to re-introduce gophers to the area...What? It's all part of the Earth Restoration Project!"
Scott: "Good. Just a matter of time now.."
Corg-Pony: "Fools! You plan will come to naught now that I know of your despicable pla-#SNAP#ARRRRGGGHHH!!! I WAS PUSHED!!!"
Lancer: "Looks broken to me."
Scott: "Indeed..."

Arnie100 wrote:Pinkie-Pie: "Don't look at me, Corgie-Pony. I didn't see anything."
Corgie-Pony: "Betrayed, yet again!"

taalismn wrote:Annie: "Okay, I'll grant you the gopher holes and the broken leg. Just try not to get blood spray on the fence. We just painted it."
Scott: "Rand, you heard the lady, put the chainsaw away."

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, what do you want next? Apparently the loofah and the pony didn't work for you."
Annie: "A barbie doll!"
Corg: "Come on! Don't I get a say in any of this?!"
Regis and Annie: "No."

SRoss wrote:"He's not anatomically correct? No wonder he's pissed off all the time."

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, what do you want next? Apparently the loofah and the pony didn't work for you."
Annie: "A barbie doll!"
Corg: "Come on! Don't I get a say in any of this?!"
Regis and Annie: "No."

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Regis: "So; Annie, what do you want next? Apparently the loofah and the pony didn't work for you."
Annie: "A barbie doll!"
Corg: "Come on! Don't I get a say in any of this?!"
Regis and Annie: "No."

"Actually all you have to do is take a little away from the chin and push the chest out a little; other than that, he's already got the correct proportions...."
"HEY!"

SRoss wrote:"He's not anatomically correct? No wonder he's pissed off all the time."

taalismn wrote:

SRoss wrote:"He's not anatomically correct? No wonder he's pissed off all the time."

This was from before the Regis thought of using ACTUAL humans as the basis of her evolution of her children.
Fortunately she hadn't discovered any 'Gumby' dolls.

Arnie100 wrote:Corg: "I am NOT a child's TOY!! I am CORG! PRINCE OF THE INVID!! Destroyer of Hu --"
Annie: "Barbie Doll..."
Corg: "I AM NOT A -- it's not fair..."

taalismn wrote:Rand: "You know, I'm really rather frightened of Annie's ability to 'morph somebody like that..."
Rook: "Oh, don't worry, Rand! It's only usable on Corg!"
Rand: "Whew! For a moment I was worried. I mean a power like that in irresponsible hands like Ann-"
Annie: "Lemur."
Rand: "....preeeee?"
Rook: "Okay, who the %&#@ told me that was 'only usable on Corg'?!"

Arnie100 wrote:Corg: "BWAHAHAHAHAHA! (Pointing at Rand) At last! Some justice!"

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Rand: "You know, I'm really rather frightened of Annie's ability to 'morph somebody like that..."
Rook: "Oh, don't worry, Rand! It's only usable on Corg!"
Rand: "Whew! For a moment I was worried. I mean a power like that in irresponsible hands like Ann-"
Annie: "Lemur."
Rand: "....preeeee?"
Rook: "Okay, who the %&#@ told me that was 'only usable on Corg'?!"

Sross: (Pointing at Taalismn) "He did!"

taalismn wrote:Rand: "You know, I'm really rather frightened of Annie's ability to 'morph somebody like that..."
Rook: "Oh, don't worry, Rand! It's only usable on Corg!"
Rand: "Whew! For a moment I was worried. I mean a power like that in irresponsible hands like Ann-"
Annie: "Lemur."
Rand: "....preeeee?"
Rook: "Okay, who the %&#@ told me that was 'only usable on Corg'?!"

Arnie100 wrote:Corg: "BWAHAHAHAHAHA! (Pointing at Rand) At last! Some justice!"

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:Corg: "BWAHAHAHAHAHA! (Pointing at Rand) At last! Some justice!"

At which point Rand demonstrates the difference between a plastic doll and a living highly agile arboreal animal with opposable thumbs...
Corg: "...get me down from here...!"

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Hnnnn...'doll' was the right concept, but I used the wrong model...Ah! Perfect!"

Rand: "Annie! Where'd you get the vintage 'Mister Bill' doll."
Annie: "Rand, you know better than to ask things like that! Of COURSE it's not a vintage pre-Rifts novelty doll, it's..."
Mr. Corg: "...oh no...."

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Hnnnn...'doll' was the right concept, but I used the wrong model...Ah! Perfect!"

Rand: "Annie! Where'd you get the vintage 'Mister Bill' doll."
Annie: "Rand, you know better than to ask things like that! Of COURSE it's not a vintage pre-Rifts novelty doll, it's..."
Mr. Corg: "...oh no...."

SRoss wrote:

taalismn wrote:Regis: "Hnnnn...'doll' was the right concept, but I used the wrong model...Ah! Perfect!"

Rand: "Annie! Where'd you get the vintage 'Mister Bill' doll."
Annie: "Rand, you know better than to ask things like that! Of COURSE it's not a vintage pre-Rifts novelty doll, it's..."
Mr. Corg: "...oh no...."

Lancer: "I'll get the hammers."

Scott: "I'll get the pliers."

Lunk: "I've got the steamroller!"

Mr. Corg:

Arnie100 wrote:"Mr. Sluggo?! Time for a salt bath..."

taalismn wrote:

Arnie100 wrote:"Mr. Sluggo?! Time for a salt bath..."

Rand: "Come on, guys, we're not THAT desperate for puns around here..."